Best. State. Ever.

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Author :
Publisher : Penguin
ISBN 13 : 1101982616
Total Pages : 242 pages
Book Rating : 4.1/5 (19 download)

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Book Synopsis Best. State. Ever. by : Dave Barry

Download or read book Best. State. Ever. written by Dave Barry and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2017-09-05 with total page 242 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A New York Times bestseller—a brilliantly funny exploration of the Sunshine State from the man who knows it best: Pulitzer Prize winner Dave Barry. We never know what will happen next in Florida. We know only that, any minute now, something will. Every few months, Dave Barry gets a call from some media person wanting to know, “What the hell is wrong with Florida?” Somehow, the state's acquired an image as a subtropical festival of stupid, and as a loyal Floridian, Dave begs to differ. Join him as he goes in hunt of the legendary Skunk Ape; hobnobs with the mermaids of Weeki Wachee Springs; and visits Cassadaga, the psychic capital of the world, to have his dog's aura read (apparently, she's "very spiritual"). Hitch a ride for the non-stop thrills of alligator-wrestling ("the gators display the same fighting spirit as a Barcalounger"), the hair-raising spectacle of a clothing-optional bar in Key West, and the manly manliness of the Machine Gun Experience in Miami. It's the most hilarious book yet from “the funniest damn writer in the whole country” (Carl Hiaasen, and he should know). By the end, you'll have to admit that whatever else you might think about Florida—you can never say it's boring.

Summary of Dave Barry's Best. State. Ever.

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Author :
Publisher : Everest Media LLC
ISBN 13 :
Total Pages : 19 pages
Book Rating : 4.8/5 (225 download)

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Book Synopsis Summary of Dave Barry's Best. State. Ever. by : Everest Media,

Download or read book Summary of Dave Barry's Best. State. Ever. written by Everest Media, and published by Everest Media LLC. This book was released on 2022-07-21T22:59:00Z with total page 19 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Please note: This is a companion version & not the original book. Sample Book Insights: #1 For millions of years, Florida was uninhabited, because it was geographically remote and several hundred feet beneath the surface of the Atlantic. It was not until Global Rising that Florida emerged from the ocean and began to grow. #2 Florida’s economy was mainly agricultural until 1865, when the Civil War broke out. In that year, a farmer decided to prank shipment some grapefruit. Northerners ate it, and the Florida economy was changed forever. #3 Florida was a quiet backwater in the 1950s, but it grew rapidly in the 1960s and 1970s because of its good climate, low taxes, and an energetic economy based on tourism and narcotics importation. #4 Florida is the third most-populous state. It is also in second place if you count dead people. More than 1,000 people move to Florida every day.

Insane City

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Author :
Publisher : Penguin
ISBN 13 : 1101609192
Total Pages : 357 pages
Book Rating : 4.1/5 (16 download)

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Book Synopsis Insane City by : Dave Barry

Download or read book Insane City written by Dave Barry and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2013-01-29 with total page 357 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Seth Weinstein always knew Tina was way, way, way out of his league. Which is why he’s still astonished that he’s on a plane heading for their wedding in Florida. The Groom Posse has already pulled an airport prank on him—and he’s survived! It should be easy going from now on. But Seth has absolutely no idea what he’s about to get into. A simple drink or two with the boys sparks a series of events that will pit Seth and his friends against everything and everyone imaginable, from his very powerful, very disapproving soon-to-be father-in-law to the federal government to a love-struck orangutan. Seth’s hope for smooth sailing is turning into a trip on the Titanic. And the water is getting deeper by the minute…

Dave Barry Slept Here

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Author :
Publisher : Ballantine Books
ISBN 13 : 0307758710
Total Pages : 192 pages
Book Rating : 4.3/5 (77 download)

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Book Synopsis Dave Barry Slept Here by : Dave Barry

Download or read book Dave Barry Slept Here written by Dave Barry and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 2010-07-28 with total page 192 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “What caused the American Revolution? This is indeed a rhetorical question that for many years historians have begun chapters with. As well they should. For the American Revolution is without a doubt the single most important historical event to occur in this nation except of course for Super Bowl III (Jets 16. Colts 7. This historian won $35).” So goes the skewed sensibility, the muddied mind, the bent pen of one of America's funniest writers, Dave Barry. This time his subject is U.S. history, the way it's never been told before. Every single momentous event and crucial moment is covered, including . . . • The Birthing Contractions of a Nation • Kicking Some British Butt • Barging Westward • The Forging of a Large, Wasteful Bureaucracy • Deep Economic Doo-doo • The Fifties: Peace, Prosperity, Brain Death . . . and right up through the scintillating Reagan-Bush years, during which, Mr. Barry notes, America is steadfastly Napping Toward Glory. If you love to laugh, if you love your country, if you are unaware that “the Sixth Amendment states that if you are accused of a crime, you have a right to a trial before a jury of people too stupid to get out of jury duty,” Dave Barry Slept Here is the book you've been waiting for since 1776. Or at least since Super Bowl III. Praise for Dave Barry Slept Here “A dazzling performance . . . Barry is brilliant.”—The Washington Post Book World “[Dave] Barry turns his formidable wit to the subject of American history, with a result reminiscent of the Reduced Shakespeare Company: The better you know the original, the funnier it gets.”—Los Angeles Times “I fear that Mr. Barry's dream of making millions of dollars through mass sales of his book to a captive audience of innocent schoolchildren will not be realized, and he will have to be content with making readers laugh a lot, as this one did.”—The New York Times Book Review

Dave Barry's Complete Guide to Guys

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Author :
Publisher : Ballantine Books
ISBN 13 : 0307758745
Total Pages : 270 pages
Book Rating : 4.3/5 (77 download)

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Book Synopsis Dave Barry's Complete Guide to Guys by : Dave Barry

Download or read book Dave Barry's Complete Guide to Guys written by Dave Barry and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 2010-07-28 with total page 270 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Dave Barry is one funny human." --San Francisco Examiner For thousands of years, women have asked themselves: What is the deal with guys, anyway? What are they thinking? The answer, of course, is: virtually nothing. Deep down inside, guys are extremely shallow. But that has not stopped Dave Barry from writing an entire book about them. If you're a guy--or if you're attempting to share a remote control with one--you need this book, because it deals frankly and semi-thoroughly with such important guy issues as: Scratching The role of guys in world history, including the heretofore-unknown relationship between the discovery of North America and golf Why the average guy can remember who won the 1960 World Series, but not necessarily the names of all his children The Noogie Gene Why guys cannot simultaneously think and look at breasts Secret guy orgasm-delaying techniques, including the Margaret Thatcher Method Why guys prefer to believe that there is no such thing as a prostate And much, much more "Whether you're a guy--or attempting to share a bathroom with one--Barry has some wacky words of wisdom for you." --USA Today

Dave Barry's Greatest Hits

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Author :
Publisher : Ballantine Books
ISBN 13 : 0345419995
Total Pages : 306 pages
Book Rating : 4.3/5 (454 download)

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Book Synopsis Dave Barry's Greatest Hits by : Dave Barry

Download or read book Dave Barry's Greatest Hits written by Dave Barry and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 1997-04-28 with total page 306 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When Dave Barry is on the loose, no one is safe! What Dave Barry did for the men’s movement in his Complete Guide to Guys and for foreign relations when he did Japan he now does for . . . everything in America. The rapacious observer of Tupperware ladies and leisure concept salesmen sounds off on: Football—Football is more than just a game. It is a potential opportunity to see a live person lying on the ground with a bone sticking out of his leg, while the fans, to show their appreciation, perform “the wave.” Sailing—There’s nothing quite like getting out on the open sea, where you can forget about the hassles and worries of life on land, and concentrate on the hassles and worries of life on the sea, such as death by squid. Gambling—Off-Track Betting parlors are the kinds of places where you never see signs that say, “Thank You for Not Smoking.” The best you can hope for is, “Thank You for Not Spitting Pieces of Your Cigar on My Neck.” “The good news: he’s funny as ever. The bad news: the book is only 304 pages.”—Los Angeles Daily News

Homes and Other Black Holes

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Author :
Publisher : Ballantine Books
ISBN 13 : 0307758826
Total Pages : 153 pages
Book Rating : 4.3/5 (77 download)

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Book Synopsis Homes and Other Black Holes by : Dave Barry

Download or read book Homes and Other Black Holes written by Dave Barry and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 2010-07-28 with total page 153 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Mr. Barry is the funniest man in America and we should encourage him." --The New York Times Book Review THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME--EXCEPT IN A SELLER'S MARKET At long last, Dave Barry, the dean of everything, lets you in on the deepest, darkest mysteries of life and answers your hysterical home purchase questions like they've never been answered before: What's the best way to determine a realistic price range? Take your total family income, including coins that have fallen behind the bureau, and any projected future revenue you have been notified about via personalized letters from Mr. Ed McMahon stating that you may already have won 14 million dollars. Then, multiply by something other than six. Can you recommend a good mortgage? There are several kinds: Fixed Rate, Variable Rate, and the bank's secret weapons, the Party Hat Mortgage and the Mortgage of the Living Dead. How can I avoid spending money on do-it-yourself homeowner's projects? Find a contractor. Their silent motto is "We Never Show Up." The Romans lived among the ruins. You must too. Is there a secret to having a beautiful lawn? Yes and no. If you fail to feed, fertilize, and water your lawn, it will die. However, if you feed, fertilize, and water your lawn, it will die.

Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need

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Author :
Publisher : Ballantine Books
ISBN 13 : 0345431138
Total Pages : 194 pages
Book Rating : 4.3/5 (454 download)

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Book Synopsis Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need by : Dave Barry

Download or read book Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need written by Dave Barry and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 1999-03-01 with total page 194 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: TAKE YOUR TRAVEL TIPS FROM DAVE BARRY, A GUY WHO IS REALLY GONE! Complete with maps, histories, quaint local facts (France's National Underwear Changing Day is March 12), song lyrics, helpful hints on how to get through Customs (all insects must be spayed), and tidbits from Dave Barry's own fond vacation nightmares, DAVE BARRY'S ONLY TRAVEL GUIDE YOU'LL EVER NEED is just that. You'll find everything you need to know in this incredibly comprehensive reference, including: - Air Travel (Or: Why Birds Never Look Truly Relaxed) - Traveling as a Family (Or: No, We Are NOT There Yet) - Traveling in Europe ("Excuse me! Where is the Big Mona Lisa?") - Camping: Nature's Way of Promoting the Motel Industry

Dave Barry Talks Back

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Author :
Publisher : Crown Archetype
ISBN 13 : 0307758729
Total Pages : 306 pages
Book Rating : 4.3/5 (77 download)

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Book Synopsis Dave Barry Talks Back by : Dave Barry

Download or read book Dave Barry Talks Back written by Dave Barry and published by Crown Archetype. This book was released on 2010-12-29 with total page 306 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Yet another collection of Barry wit and wisdom by the Pulitzer Prize-winning humorist and the author of Dave Barry Turns 40.

Lessons From Lucy

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Author :
Publisher : Simon & Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1501161164
Total Pages : 240 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (11 download)

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Book Synopsis Lessons From Lucy by : Dave Barry

Download or read book Lessons From Lucy written by Dave Barry and published by Simon & Schuster. This book was released on 2020-11-03 with total page 240 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this “little gem” (Washington Independent Review of Books), Pulitzer Prize–winning columnist and New York Times bestselling author Dave Barry learns how to age happily from his old but joyful dog, Lucy. As Dave Barry turns seventy—not happily—he realizes that his dog, Lucy, is dealing with old age far better than he is. She has more friends, fewer worries, and way more fun. So Dave decides to figure out how Lucy manages to stay so happy, to see if he can make his own life happier by doing the things she does (except for drinking from the toilet). He reconnects with old friends and tries to make new ones—which turns out to be a struggle, because Lucy likes people a lot more than he does. And he gets back in touch with two ridiculous but fun groups from his past: the Lawn Rangers, a group of guys who march in parades pushing lawnmowers and twirling brooms (alcohol is involved), and the Rock Bottom Remainders, the world’s oldest and least-talented all-author band. With each new lesson, Dave riffs hilariously on dogs, people, and life in general, while also pondering Deep Questions, such as when it’s okay to lie. (Answer: when scallops are involved.) Lessons From Lucy shows readers a new side to Dave Barry that’s “touching and sentimental, but there’s still a laugh on every page” (The Sacramento Bee). The master humorist has written a witty and affable guide to joyous living at any age.

Dave Barry's Book of Bad Songs

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Author :
Publisher : Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN 13 : 1449437583
Total Pages : 69 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (494 download)

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Book Synopsis Dave Barry's Book of Bad Songs by : Dave Barry

Download or read book Dave Barry's Book of Bad Songs written by Dave Barry and published by Andrews McMeel Publishing. This book was released on 2012-11-06 with total page 69 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The humorist asked his readers to share their least favorite tunes and chronicles the hilarious responses. When funnyman Dave Barry asked readers about their least favorite tunes, he thought he was penning just another installment of his weekly syndicated humor column. But the witty writer was flabbergasted by the response when over 10,000 readers voted. “I have never written a column that got a bigger response than the one announcing the Bad Song Survey,” Barry wrote. Based on the results of the survey, Dave Barry’s Book of Bad Songs is a compilation of some of the worst songs ever written. Dave Barry fans will relish his quirky take. Music buffs too will appreciate this humorous stroll through the world’s worst lyrics. The only thing wrong with this book is that readers will find themselves unable to stop mentally singing the greatest hits of Gary Puckett. Praise for Dave Barry’s Book of Bad Songs “Barry is his usual puckish self, but the real surprise here is how funny many of the survey respondents are.” —Kirkus Reviews “Who can resist such a book?” —Publishers Weekly

The Worst Class Trip Ever

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Author :
Publisher : Little, Brown Books for Young Readers
ISBN 13 : 1484719417
Total Pages : 157 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (847 download)

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Book Synopsis The Worst Class Trip Ever by : Dave Barry

Download or read book The Worst Class Trip Ever written by Dave Barry and published by Little, Brown Books for Young Readers. This book was released on 2015-05-05 with total page 157 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this hilarious novel, written in the voice of eighth-grader Wyatt Palmer, Dave Barry takes us on a class trip to Washington, DC. Wyatt, his best friend, Matt, and a few kids from Culver Middle School find themselves in a heap of trouble-not just with their teachers, who have long lost patience with them -- but from several mysterious men they first meet on their flight to the nation's capital. In a fast-paced adventure with the monuments as a backdrop, the kids try to stay out of danger and out of the doghouse while trying to save the president from attack-or maybe not.

Live Right and Find Happiness (Although Beer is Much Faster)

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Author :
Publisher : Penguin
ISBN 13 : 0425280144
Total Pages : 242 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (252 download)

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Book Synopsis Live Right and Find Happiness (Although Beer is Much Faster) by : Dave Barry

Download or read book Live Right and Find Happiness (Although Beer is Much Faster) written by Dave Barry and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2016-09-06 with total page 242 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Now in paperback from the Pulitzer Prize winner, the hilarious New York Times–bestselling exploration of what generations can teach one another—or not. During the course of his life, Dave Barry has learned much of wisdom, and he is eager to pass it on. Among other brilliant, brand-new pieces, Dave shares home truths with his new grandson and his daughter Sophie; explores the hometown of his youth, where all the parents seemed to be having un-Mad Men–like fun; and dives into firsthand accounts of the soccer craziness of Brazil and the just plain crazy craziness of Vladimir Putin’s Russia.

The Worst Night Ever

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Author :
Publisher : Little, Brown Books for Young Readers
ISBN 13 : 1484785983
Total Pages : 201 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (847 download)

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Book Synopsis The Worst Night Ever by : Dave Barry

Download or read book The Worst Night Ever written by Dave Barry and published by Little, Brown Books for Young Readers. This book was released on 2016-04-04 with total page 201 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Wyatt Palmer was a middle-school hero, but that doesn't count for anything in high school. When a ferret goes missing in this hilarious follow-up to The Worst Class Trip Ever, Wyatt and his friend Matt find themselves as unwanted guests at what turns into the Worst Party Ever! Last year, Wyatt foiled a plot against the president of the United States and became the hero of middle school. But now he and his friends are in Coral Cove High School—home of the Fighting Conch—and Wyatt is a hero no longer; he's just another undersized freshman, hoping to fit in, or at least not be unpopular. Things start to go wrong when Matt Diaz, who is Wyatt's best friend but also unfortunately an idiot, decides to bring his pet ferret, Frank, to school. Through an unfortunate series of events Frank ends up in the hands of the Bevin brothers, who are the most popular boys at Coral Cove High, but are also, as Matt soon discovers, the nastiest. When Wyatt and Matt try to get Frank back, they concoct a plan to attend a party for the cool clique at the Bevin's waterfront mansion and stumble onto the Bevin family's dark and deadly secret. That's when Wyatt learns that some things are worse than being unpopular in high school. MUCH worse.

Lunatics

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Author :
Publisher : Penguin
ISBN 13 : 1101565772
Total Pages : 348 pages
Book Rating : 4.1/5 (15 download)

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Book Synopsis Lunatics by : Dave Barry

Download or read book Lunatics written by Dave Barry and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2012-01-10 with total page 348 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Philip Horkman is a happy man, the owner of a pet store called The Wine Shop, and on Sundays a referee for a local kids’ soccer league. Jeffrey Peckerman is the proud and loving father of a star athlete in the girls’ ten-and-under soccer league, and he’s not exactly happy with the ref. The two of them are about to collide in a swiftly escalating series of events that will send them running for their lives, pursued by the police, soldiers, subversives, bears, revolutionaries, pirates, and a black ops team that does not exist. Where all that takes them you can’t even begin to guess, but the literary journey there is a masterpiece of inspiration, chaos, and unadulterated, well, lunacy. And they might even learn a lesson or two along the way.

Dave Barry in Cyberspace

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Author :
Publisher : Ballantine Books
ISBN 13 : 0307758680
Total Pages : 226 pages
Book Rating : 4.3/5 (77 download)

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Book Synopsis Dave Barry in Cyberspace by : Dave Barry

Download or read book Dave Barry in Cyberspace written by Dave Barry and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 2010-09-29 with total page 226 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "RELENTLESSLY FUNNY . . . BARRY SHINES." --People A self-professed computer geek who actually does Windows 95, bestselling humorist Dave Barry takes us on a hilarious hard drive via the information superhighway--and into the very heart of cyberspace, asking the provocative question: If God had wanted us to be concise, why give us so many fonts? Inside you'll find juicy bytes on How to Buy and Set Up a Computer; Step One: Get Valium Nerdstock in the Desert; Or: Bill Gates Is Elvis Software: Making Your Computer Come Alive So It Can Attack You Word Processing: How to Press an Enormous Number of Keys Without Ever Actually Writing Anything Selected Web Sites, including Cursing in Swedish, Deformed Frog Pictures, and The Toilets of Melbourne, Australia And much, much more! "VERY FUNNY . . . After a day spent staring at a computer monitor, think of the book as a kind of screen saver for your brain." --New York Times Book Review

Dave Barry's Money Secrets

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Author :
Publisher : Crown
ISBN 13 : 0307351009
Total Pages : 242 pages
Book Rating : 4.3/5 (73 download)

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Book Synopsis Dave Barry's Money Secrets by : Dave Barry

Download or read book Dave Barry's Money Secrets written by Dave Barry and published by Crown. This book was released on 2006-12-26 with total page 242 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Did you ever wish that you really understood money? Well, Dave Barry wishes that he did, too. But that hasn’t stopped him from writing this book. In it, Dave explores (as only he can) such topics as: • How the U.S. economy works, including the often overlooked role of Adam Sandler • Why it is not a good idea to use squirrels for money • Strategies that will give you the confidence you need to try for a good job, even though you are—let’s be honest—a no-talent loser • How corporate executives, simply by walking into their offices, immediately become much stupider • An absolutely foolproof system for making money in the stock market, requiring only a little effort (and access to time travel) • Surefire tips for buying and selling real estate, the key being: Never buy—or, for that matter, sell—real estate • How to minimize your federal taxes, safely and legally, by cheating • Why good colleges cost so much, and how to make sure your child does not get into one • How to reduce the cost of your medical care by basically not getting any • Estate planning, especially the financial benefits of an early death • And many, many pictures of Suze Orman But that’s only the beginning! Dave has also included in this book all of the important points from a book written by Donald Trump, so you don’t have to read it yourself. Plus he explains how to tip, how to negotiate for everything (including bridge tolls), how to argue with your spouse about money, and how much allowance to give your children (three dollars is plenty). He also presents, for the first time in print anywhere, the Car Dealership Code of Ethics (“Ethic Seven: The customer is an idiot”). Also, there are many gratuitous references to Angelina Jolie naked. You can’t afford not to buy this book! Probably you need several copies. What kind of financial shape are you in right now? This scientific quiz will show you. Be honest in your answers: If you lie, you’ll only be lying to yourself! The place to lie is on your federal tax return. What is your annual income? 1. More than $50,000. 2. Less than $50,000. 3. However much I get when I return these empties. Not counting your mortgage, how much money do you currently owe? 1. Less than $10,000. 2. More than $10,000. 3. Men are threatening to cut off my thumbs. How would you describe your portfolio? 1. Conservative, mainly bonds and blue-chip equities. 2. Aggressive, mainly options and speculative stocks. 3. My what? When analyzing an investment, what do you consider to be the most important factor? 1. The amount of return. 2. The degree of risk. 3. The name of the jockey. How do you plan to finance your retirement? 1. Savings. 2. Social security. 3. Sale of kidneys. —from the Introduction: “Why You Need This Book” Also available as a Crown eBook.