Uganda Be Kidding Me

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Uganda Be Kidding Me

Author : Chelsea Handler
Publisher : Grand Central Publishing
ISBN 13 : 1455599727
Total Pages : 272 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (555 download)

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Book Synopsis Uganda Be Kidding Me by : Chelsea Handler

Download or read book Uganda Be Kidding Me written by Chelsea Handler and published by Grand Central Publishing. This book was released on 2014-03-04 with total page 272 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Wherever Chelsea Handler travels, one thing is certain: she always ends up in the land of the ridiculous. Now, in this uproarious collection, she sneaks her sharp wit through airport security and delivers her most absurd and hilarious stories ever. On safari in Africa, it's anyone's guess as to what's more dangerous: the wildlife or Chelsea. But whether she's fumbling the seduction of a guide by not knowing where tigers live (Asia, duh) or wearing a bathrobe into the bush because her clothes stopped fitting seven margaritas ago, she's always game for the next misadventure. The situation gets down and dirty as she defiles a kayak in the Bahamas, and outright sweaty as she escapes from a German hospital on crutches. When things get truly scary, like finding herself stuck next to a passenger with bad breath, she knows she can rely on her family to make matters even worse. Thank goodness she has the devoted Chunk by her side-except for the time she loses him in Telluride. Complete with answers to the most frequently asked traveler's questions, hot travel trips, and travel etiquette, none of which should be believed, UGANDA BE KIDDING ME has Chelsea taking on the world, one laugh-out-loud incident at a time.

Uganda Be Kidding Me

Author : Chelsea Handler
Publisher : Grand Central Publishing
ISBN 13 : 9781455599714
Total Pages : 0 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (997 download)

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Book Synopsis Uganda Be Kidding Me by : Chelsea Handler

Download or read book Uganda Be Kidding Me written by Chelsea Handler and published by Grand Central Publishing. This book was released on 2015-02-17 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Wherever Chelsea Handler travels, one thing is certain: she always ends up in the land of the ridiculous. Now, in this uproarious collection, she sneaks her sharp wit through airport security and delivers her most absurd and hilarious stories ever. On safari in Africa, it's anyone's guess as to what's more dangerous: the wildlife or Chelsea. But whether she's fumbling the seduction of a guide by not knowing where tigers live (Asia, duh) or wearing a bathrobe into the bush because her clothes stopped fitting seven margaritas ago, she's always game for the next misadventure. The situation gets down and dirty as she defiles a kayak in the Bahamas, and outright sweaty as she escapes from a German hospital on crutches. When things get truly scary, like finding herself stuck next to a passenger with bad breath, she knows she can rely on her family to make matters even worse. Thank goodness she has the devoted Chunk by her side-except for the time she loses him in Telluride. Complete with answers to the most frequently asked traveler's questions, hot travel trips, and travel etiquette, none of which should be believed, UGANDA BE KIDDING ME has Chelsea taking on the world, one laugh-out-loud incident at a time.

Uganda Be Kidding Me

Author : Chelsea Handler
Publisher : Hachette UK
ISBN 13 : 1455599727
Total Pages : 272 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (555 download)

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Book Synopsis Uganda Be Kidding Me by : Chelsea Handler

Download or read book Uganda Be Kidding Me written by Chelsea Handler and published by Hachette UK. This book was released on 2014-03-04 with total page 272 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this uproarious collection of travel essays, Chelsea Handler sneaks her sharp wit through airport security and delivers her most absurd and hilarious stories ever. On safari in Africa, it's anyone's guess as to what's more dangerous: the wildlife or Chelsea. But whether she's fumbling the seduction of a guide by not knowing where tigers live (Asia, duh) or wearing a bathrobe into the bush because her clothes stopped fitting seven margaritas ago, she's always game for the next misadventure. The situation gets down and dirty as she defiles a kayak in the Bahamas, and outright sweaty as she escapes from a German hospital on crutches. When things get truly scary, like finding herself stuck next to a passenger with bad breath, she knows she can rely on her family to make matters even worse. Thank goodness she has the devoted Chunk by her side-except for the time she loses him in Telluride. Complete with answers to the most frequently asked traveler's questions, hot travel trips, and travel etiquette, none of which should be believed, Uganda Be Kidding Me has Chelsea taking on the world, one laugh-out-loud incident at a time.

Life Will Be the Death of Me

Author : Chelsea Handler
Publisher : Dial Press
ISBN 13 : 0525511784
Total Pages : 272 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (255 download)

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Book Synopsis Life Will Be the Death of Me by : Chelsea Handler

Download or read book Life Will Be the Death of Me written by Chelsea Handler and published by Dial Press. This book was released on 2019-04-09 with total page 272 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: #1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • The funny, sad, super-honest, all-true story of Chelsea Handler’s year of self-discovery—featuring a nerdily brilliant psychiatrist, a shaman, four Chow Chows, some well-placed security cameras, various family members (living and departed), friends, assistants, and a lot of edibles A SKIMM READS PICK • “This will be one of your favorite books of all time.”—Amy Schumer In a haze of vape smoke on a rare windy night in L.A. in the fall of 2016, Chelsea Handler daydreams about what life will be like with a woman in the White House. And then Donald Trump happens. In a torpor of despair, she decides that she’s had enough of the privileged bubble she’s lived in—a bubble within a bubble—and that it’s time to make some changes, both in her personal life and in the world at large. At home, she embarks on a year of self-sufficiency—learning how to work the remote, how to pick up dog shit, where to find the toaster. She meets her match in an earnest, brainy psychiatrist and enters into therapy, prepared to do the heavy lifting required to look within and make sense of a childhood marked by love and loss and to figure out why people are afraid of her. She becomes politically active—finding her voice as an advocate for change, having difficult conversations, and energizing her base. In the process, she develops a healthy fixation on Special Counsel Robert Mueller and, through unflinching self-reflection and psychological excavation, unearths some glittering truths that light up the road ahead. Thrillingly honest, insightful, and deeply, darkly funny, Chelsea Handler’s memoir keeps readers laughing, even as it inspires us to look within and ask ourselves what really matters in our own lives. Praise for Life Will Be the Death of Me “You thought you knew Chelsea Handler—and she thought she knew herself—but in her new book, she discovers that true progress lies in the direction we haven’t been.”—Gloria Steinem “I always wondered what it would be like to watch Chelsea Handler in session with her therapist. Now I know.”—Ellen DeGeneres “I love this book not just because it made me laugh or because I learned that I feel the same way about certain people in politics as Chelsea does. I love this book because I feel like I finally really got to know Chelsea Handler after all these years. Thank you for sharing, Chelsea!”—Tiffany Haddish

Lies That Chelsea Handler Told Me

Author : Friends Chelsea's Family, and Other Victims
Publisher : Borderline Amazing/A Chelsea Handler Book
ISBN 13 : 1455504653
Total Pages : 304 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (555 download)

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Book Synopsis Lies That Chelsea Handler Told Me by : Friends Chelsea's Family, and Other Victims

Download or read book Lies That Chelsea Handler Told Me written by Friends Chelsea's Family, and Other Victims and published by Borderline Amazing/A Chelsea Handler Book. This book was released on 2011-05-10 with total page 304 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "My tendency to make up stories and lie compulsively for the sake of my own amusement takes up a good portion of my day and provides me with a peace of mind not easily attainable in this economic climate."--Chelsea Handler, from Chapter 10 of Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang It's no lie: Chelsea Handler loves to smoke out "dumbassness," the condition people suffer from that allows them to fall prey to her brand of complete and utter nonsense. Friends, family, co-workers--they've all been tricked by Chelsea into believing stories of total foolishness and into behaving like total fools. Luckily, they've lived to tell the tales and, for the very first time, write about them.

Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang

Author : Chelsea Handler
Publisher : Grand Central Publishing
ISBN 13 : 0446563536
Total Pages : 256 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (465 download)

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Book Synopsis Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang by : Chelsea Handler

Download or read book Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang written by Chelsea Handler and published by Grand Central Publishing. This book was released on 2010-04-01 with total page 256 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In these personal essays, the hilarious comedian and Chelsea Lately host reflects on family, love life, and the absurdities of adulthood with "cheeky candor" and signature wit (Philadelphia Inquirer). Life doesn't get more hilarious than when Chelsea Handler takes aim with her irreverent wit. Who else would send all-staff emails to smoke out the dumbest people on her show? Now, in this new collection of original essays, the #1 bestselling author of Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea delivers one laugh-out-loud moment after another as she sets her sights on the ridiculous side of childhood, adulthood, and daughterhood. Family moments are fair game, whether it's writing a report on Reaganomics to earn a Cabbage Patch doll, or teaching her father social graces by ordering him to stay indoors. It's open season on her love life, from playing a prank on her boyfriend (using a ravioli, a fake autopsy, and the Santa Monica pier) to adopting a dog so she can snuggle with someone who doesn't talk. And everyone better duck for cover when her beach vacation turns into matchmaking gone wild. Outrageously funny and deliciously wicked, Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang is good good good good! Chelsea Handler on . . . Being unpopular: "My parents couldn't have been more unreasonable when it came to fads or clothes that weren't purchased at a pharmacy." Living with her boyfriend: "He's similar to a large toddler, the only difference being he doesn't cry when he wakes up." Appreciating her brother: "He's a certified public accountant, and I have a real life." Arm-wrestling a maid of honor: "It wasn't her strength that intimidated me. It was the starry way her eyes focused on me, like Mike Tyson getting ready to feed."

My Horizontal Life

Author : Chelsea Handler
Publisher : Grand Central Publishing
ISBN 13 : 1455577529
Total Pages : 141 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (555 download)

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Book Synopsis My Horizontal Life by : Chelsea Handler

Download or read book My Horizontal Life written by Chelsea Handler and published by Grand Central Publishing. This book was released on 2013-04-30 with total page 141 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this raucous collection of true-life stories, Chelsea Handler recounts her time spent in the social trenches with that wild, strange, irresistible, and often gratifying beast: the one-night stand. You've either done it or know someone who has: the one-night stand, the familiar outcome of a night spent at a bar, sometimes the sole payoff for your friend's irritating wedding, or the only relief from a disastrous vacation. Often embarrassing and uncomfortable, occasionally outlandish, but most times just a necessary and irresistible evil, the one-night stand is a social rite as old as sex itself and as common as a bar stool. Enter Chelsea Handler. Gorgeous, sharp, and anything but shy, Chelsea loves men and lots of them. My Horizontal Life chronicles her romp through the different bedrooms of a variety of suitors, a no-holds-barred account of what can happen between a man and a sometimes very intoxicated, outgoing woman during one night of passion. From her short fling with a Vegas stripper to her even shorter dalliance with a well-endowed little person, from her uncomfortable tryst with a cruise ship performer to her misguided rebound with a man who likes to play leather dress-up, Chelsea recalls the highs and lows of her one-night stands with hilarious honesty. Encouraged by her motley collection of friends (aka: her partners in crime) but challenged by her family members (who at times find themselves a surprise part of the encounter), Chelsea hits bottom and bounces back, unafraid to share the gritty details. My Horizontal Life is one guilty pleasure you won't be ashamed to talk about in the morning.

Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea

Author : Chelsea Handler
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1416596364
Total Pages : 274 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (165 download)

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Book Synopsis Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea by : Chelsea Handler

Download or read book Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea written by Chelsea Handler and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2009-12-29 with total page 274 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In a word: hilarious. . . . These are some of the funniest stories I have ever read and they're also some of the most unexpectedly heartfelt--Laura Zigman, author of "Animal Husbandry."

Live Fast Die Hot

Author : Jenny Mollen
Publisher : Anchor
ISBN 13 : 1101969989
Total Pages : 274 pages
Book Rating : 4.1/5 (19 download)

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Book Synopsis Live Fast Die Hot by : Jenny Mollen

Download or read book Live Fast Die Hot written by Jenny Mollen and published by Anchor. This book was released on 2017-06-27 with total page 274 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: *A NEW YORK TIMES HUMOR BESTSELLER* By the author of I Like You Just the Way I Am and a frequent Chelsea contributor, an outrageous collection of personal stories about motherhood, responsibility, and other potential disasters. Jenny Mollen is a writer and actress living in New York. Until recently, her life was exciting, sexy, a little eccentric, and one hundred percent impulsive. She had a husband who embraced her crazy—who understood her need to occasionally stalk around the house in his ex-girlfriend’s old beach caftans and to invite their drug dealer to Passover seder (so he wouldn’t feel like they were using him only for drugs). Then they had their son, Sid, and overnight, Jenny was forced to grow up: to be responsible, to brush her hair, to listen to her voicemail. Searingly funny and surprisingly affecting, Live Fast Die Hot is a collection of stories about what happens when you realize that some things are more important than crafting the perfect tweet—and a reminder that even if you never thought you were cut out for parenting, at least you can be better at it than your mother.

How to American

Author : Jimmy O. Yang
Publisher :
ISBN 13 : 9780306921865
Total Pages : pages
Book Rating : 4.9/5 (218 download)

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Book Synopsis How to American by : Jimmy O. Yang

Download or read book How to American written by Jimmy O. Yang and published by . This book was released on 2018 with total page pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Standup comic, actor and fan favorite from the popular HBO series Silicon Valley shares his memoir of growing up as a Chinese immigrant in California and making it in Hollywood. "I turned down a job in finance to pursue a career in stand-up comedy. My dad thought I was crazy. But I figured it was better to disappoint my parents for a few years than to disappoint myself for the rest of my life. I had to disappoint them in order to pursue what I loved. That was the only way to have my Chinese turnip cake and eat an American apple pie too." Jimmy O. Yang is a standup comedian, film and TV actor and fan favorite as the character Jian Yang from the popular HBO series Silicon Valley. In How to American, he shares his story of growing up as a Chinese immigrant who pursued a Hollywood career against the wishes of his parents: Yang arrived in Los Angeles from Hong Kong at age 13, learned English by watching BET RapCity for three hours a day, and worked as a strip club DJ while pursuing his comedy career. He chronicles a near deportation episode during a college trip Tijuana to finally becoming a proud US citizen ten years later. Featuring those and many other hilarious stories, while sharing some hard-earned lessons, How to American mocks stereotypes while offering tongue in cheek advice on pursuing the American dreams of fame, fortune, and strippers.

Love, Skip, Jump

Author : Shelene Bryan
Publisher : Thomas Nelson
ISBN 13 : 1400206170
Total Pages : 257 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (2 download)

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Book Synopsis Love, Skip, Jump by : Shelene Bryan

Download or read book Love, Skip, Jump written by Shelene Bryan and published by Thomas Nelson. This book was released on 2014-05-06 with total page 257 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Every significant event in the Bible happened because someone said yes to God. Start living the adventure of yes today! In this whimsical yet inspiring book, Shelene tells the stories of real-life paths God took her on to learn some simple truths that changed everything in her life—everything for the better. By loving how our Creator made us to love; skipping comfort and safety to help those who can never repay us; and taking a risk to jump into the epic journey God has for our lives, the reality is we are all just one yes away from changing everything. Don’t miss out on the incredible adventure God has for you. Say yes to God—love, skip, and jump your way to his plans for you!

It Takes Balls

Author : Josh Wolf
Publisher : Grand Central Publishing
ISBN 13 : 1455511692
Total Pages : 175 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (555 download)

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Book Synopsis It Takes Balls by : Josh Wolf

Download or read book It Takes Balls written by Josh Wolf and published by Grand Central Publishing. This book was released on 2013-03-19 with total page 175 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Josh Wolf--one of the stars and writers of Chelsea Lately and After Lately--delivers a hilarious collection of essays that reminds us all what it takes to conquer fatherhood without sacrificing manhood. Struggling to make it as a stand-up comic didn't always fit with being a single parent. But Josh figured out his own set of rules--through trial and (frequent) error. Early picking up kids from school? The nearby strip club is a great place to kill time and bond with some like-minded dads. Want a drunken heart-to-heart with your son? First make sure there's no Sharpie around in case you pass out. Wondering where to take that special someone at the end of the night? Remember that no sane woman will have sex with you in a one-bedroom apartment where your kids are sleeping--even if you promise to be really, really quiet. Whether it's revealing the secrets to limitless hookups (hint: it's single moms) and getting rid of your children's friends that you just can't stand (hint: it's not single moms), or blackmailing PTA members and ignoring health codes, Josh is sure to impart some parenting wisdom along the way. Or at least have a good time trying.

Ali's Well That Ends Well

Author : Ali Wentworth
Publisher : HarperCollins
ISBN 13 : 0062980882
Total Pages : 132 pages
Book Rating : 4.0/5 (629 download)

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Book Synopsis Ali's Well That Ends Well by : Ali Wentworth

Download or read book Ali's Well That Ends Well written by Ali Wentworth and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2022-05-10 with total page 132 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER Bestselling author Ali Wentworth offers a comedic look at family, friendship, and lessons learned during the Covid-19 pandemic in her new collection of laugh-out-loud comic vignettes. Like many, Ali Wentworth spent the pandemic seesawing between highs, lows, and baking an unnecessary amount of chocolate cake. Between binging every tv show in existence to conquering TikTok to becoming a (semi) empty-nester, Ali experienced her share of turmoil (including an early case of Covid), but she also grew a little, learned a lot, and found comfort in some unexpected people and places. In Ali’s Well That Ends Well, Wentworth turns her gimlet eye to the year no one saw coming. With her signature irreverent style, she shares the most hysterical, absurd, and sometimes trying episodes that her family endured during the terrible global pandemic. Thoroughly relatable, absolutely charming, and filled with moments both hilarious and poignant, this terrific collection once again showcases the comedic genius of a beloved star who is “the girlfriend you want to have a glass of wine with, the one who makes you laugh because she sees the funny and the absurd in everything" (Huffington Post).

The Dark of the Sun

Author : Wilbur Smith
Publisher : Bonnier Publishing Fiction Ltd.
ISBN 13 : 1785765906
Total Pages : 249 pages
Book Rating : 4.7/5 (857 download)

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Book Synopsis The Dark of the Sun by : Wilbur Smith

Download or read book The Dark of the Sun written by Wilbur Smith and published by Bonnier Publishing Fiction Ltd.. This book was released on 2018-01-01 with total page 249 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: An action-packed thriller by global sensation, Wilbur Smith. 'A master storyteller' - Sunday Times 'Wilbur Smith is one of those benchmarks against whom others are compared' - The Times 'No one does adventure quite like Smith' - Daily Mirror The highest prize comes at the highest price... Captain Bruce Curry has a simple enough mission: to lead his mercenary soldiers to rescue a town cut off by rebel fighting in the Belgian Congo. But events quickly take a turn for the worse as it becomes clear that the town's diamond supplies are the real focus of the mission. And where there is treasure, danger always seems to follow. It isn't long before Curry finds something even more valuable than diamonds in the town. Something he'll do anything to protect. And soon he discovers that his most deadly enemies might be those closest to him . . .

I Can Barely Take Care of Myself

Author : Jen Kirkman
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1476739943
Total Pages : 224 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (767 download)

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Book Synopsis I Can Barely Take Care of Myself by : Jen Kirkman

Download or read book I Can Barely Take Care of Myself written by Jen Kirkman and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2014-04-22 with total page 224 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A memoir from the stand-up comedian, writer, and actress that focuses on her oft-questioned (by others) decision to remain childless.

I Like You Just the Way I Am

Author : Jenny Mollen
Publisher : Macmillan
ISBN 13 : 1250041686
Total Pages : 273 pages
Book Rating : 4.2/5 (5 download)

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Book Synopsis I Like You Just the Way I Am by : Jenny Mollen

Download or read book I Like You Just the Way I Am written by Jenny Mollen and published by Macmillan. This book was released on 2014-06-17 with total page 273 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Jenny Mollen is an actress and writer living in Los Angeles. She is also a wife, married to a famous guy (which is annoying only because he gets free [stuff] and she doesn't). She doesn't want much from life. Just to be loved by everybody: her parents, her dogs, her ex-boyfriends, her ex-boyfriends, dogs, her husband, her husband's ex-girlfriends, her husband's ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends, etc. Some people might call that impulse crazy, but isn't 'crazy' really just a word boring people use to describe fun people? (And Jenny is really, really fun)"--Dust jacket flap.

Man Up!

Author : Ross Mathews
Publisher : Grand Central Publishing
ISBN 13 : 1455501794
Total Pages : 175 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (555 download)

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Book Synopsis Man Up! by : Ross Mathews

Download or read book Man Up! written by Ross Mathews and published by Grand Central Publishing. This book was released on 2013-05-07 with total page 175 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this hilarious and inspirational memoir, Ross Mathews -- best known as "Ross the Intern" from The Tonight Show with Jay Leno -- chronicles his life growing up as an atypical kid in a small Northwestern farm town to living as an atypical adult in Los Angeles, to eventually being his loud, proud, apologetically genuine self on national television. As a young kid growing up in a farm town, Ross Mathews might as well have wished for a pet unicorn or a calorie-free cookie tree to grow in his front yard. Either of those far-fetched fantasies would have been more likely to come true than his real dream: working in television in Hollywood, California. Seriously, that stuff just doesn't happen to people like Ross. But guess what? It totally did. Now, with his first book, Ross takes us inside his journey as a super-fan, revealing the most embarrassing and hilarious moments of his small-town life and big-city adventures. From learning to swear like a hardened trucker to that time in high school when had to face down the most frightening opponent of all (his girlfriend's lady bits), Ross holds nothing back. Oh, then there's his surprisingly shady past involving the cutest pair of plus-sized women's pajama bottoms, deliciously dangerous pot butter, and embezzled sandwiches. And, of course, how he's managed to turn an obsession with pop-culture into one-on-one interactions with celebrities like Gwyneth Paltrow, Tiffani-Amber Theissen, Madonna, Michelle Kwan, and countless more without ever having a single restraining order issued against him. Infused with Ross's trademark humor, unique voice, and total honesty, Man Up! is a mission statement for anyone who doesn't fit the mold. His hasn't been the most traditional way to build a career in Hollywood, but Ross has somehow managed to make his mark without ever compromising who he is. He is as serious about this as he is about Golden Girls trivia: You don't need to change who you are to achieve your dreams (although there's nothing wrong with a makeover every now and then). You just need to Man Up!