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Stop Dressing Your Six Year Old Like A Skank
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Book Synopsis Stop Dressing Your Six-Year-Old Like a Skank by : Celia Rivenbark
Download or read book Stop Dressing Your Six-Year-Old Like a Skank written by Celia Rivenbark and published by Macmillan. This book was released on 2007-09-04 with total page 290 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A collection of essays about life in the Southern United States.
Book Synopsis Stop Dressing Your Six-Year-Old Like a Skank by : Celia Rivenbark
Download or read book Stop Dressing Your Six-Year-Old Like a Skank written by Celia Rivenbark and published by St. Martin's Press. This book was released on 2007-09-04 with total page 272 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Celia Rivenbark's essays about life in today's South are like caramel popcorn---sweet, salty, and utterly irresistible Celia Rivenbark is a master at summing up the South in all its glorious excesses and contradictions. In this collection of screamingly funny essays, you'll discover: * How to get your kid into a character breakfast at Disneyworld (or run the risk of eating chicken out of a bucket with Sneezy) * Secrets of Celebrity Moms (don't hate them because they're beautiful when there are so many other reasons to hate them) * EBay addiction and why "It ain't worth having if it ain't on eBay" (Whoa! Is that Willie Nelson's face in your grits?) * Why today's children's clothes make six-year-olds look like Vegas showgirls with an abundance of anger issues * And so much more! Rivenbark is an intrepid explorer and acid commentator on the land south of the Mason-Dixon line.
Book Synopsis Rude Bitches Make Me Tired by : Celia Rivenbark
Download or read book Rude Bitches Make Me Tired written by Celia Rivenbark and published by St. Martin's Press. This book was released on 2013-10-22 with total page 272 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this always sensible and mildly profane etiquette manual for the modern age Celia Rivenbark addresses real-life quandaries ranging from how to deal with braggy playground moms to wondering if you can have sex in your aunt's bed on vacation to correctly grieving the dearly departed (hint: it doesn't include tattoos or truck decals). Rude Bitches Make Me Tired will provide answers to all your mannerly questions as Celia discusses the social conundrums of our day and age, including: Navigating the agonies of check splitting ("Who had the gorgonzola crumbles and should we really care?")The baffling aspects of airline travel (such as "Recline Monster" and other animals)The art of the visit (always leave them wanting more . . . much more)Gym and locker etiquette (hint: no one wants to talk to you while you're buck naked)Office manners ("Loud talkers, cake hawkers, and Britney Sue's unfortunate cyst")And much more! Good manners have never been so wickedly funny!
Book Synopsis We're Just Like You, Only Prettier by : Celia Rivenbark
Download or read book We're Just Like You, Only Prettier written by Celia Rivenbark and published by St. Martin's Press. This book was released on 2010-04-01 with total page 292 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "On the short drive to the preschool, I dutifully unwrap a NutriGrain bar and toss it into the back seat to my four-year-old. Sometimes I'll even unwrap one for myself. Studies have shown that it's very important for familes to eat together. . . . " Why couldn't the Sopranos survive living down South? Simple. You can't shoot a guy full of holes after eating chicken and pastry, spoon bread, okra, and tomatoes. What does a Southern woman consider grounds for divorce? When Daddy takes the kids out in public dressed in pajama tops and Tweety Bird swim socks. Again. What is the Southern woman's opinion of a new "fat virus" theory? Bring it on! We've got a lot of skinny friends we need to sneeze on. Want to become honest-to-Jesus white trash? Spend two weeks' salary on hair extensions and pancake makeup for your three-year-old so she can win a five-dollar trophy in the Wee Tiny Miss pageant and the adoration of, well, nobody much. What does the Southern woman think of Paul McCartney's marriage to a model thirty years younger? We're not surprised. Statistically speaking, it's almost impossible for billionaires to discover that their soulmates are fifty-five and restocking the shampoo end caps at Kmart. In this wickedly funny follow-up to her bestselling Bless Your Heart, Tramp, Celia Rivenbark welcomes you, once again, to the south she loves, the land of "Mama and them's," "precious and dahlin," and mommies who mow. Ya'll come back now, you hear.
Book Synopsis Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life by : Tracy Schorn
Download or read book Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life written by Tracy Schorn and published by Running Press Adult. This book was released on 2016-05-10 with total page 240 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life is a no-nonsense self-help guide for anyone who has ever been cheated on. Here's advice not based on saving your relationship after infidelity—but saving your sanity. When it comes to cheating, a lot of the attention is focused on cheaters—their unmet needs or their challenges with monogamy. But Tracy Schorn (aka Chump Lady) lampoons such blameshifting and puts the focus squarely on the-cheated-upon (chumps) and their needs. Combining solid advice that champions self-respect, along with hilarious cartoons satirizing the pomposity of cheaters, Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life offers a fresh voice for chumps who want (and need) a new message about infidelity. This book will offer advice on Stupid sh*t cheaters say and how to respond, Rookie mistakes of the recently chumped and how to disarm your fears, Why chumps take the blame and how to protect yourself, and more. Full of snark, sass, and real wisdom about how to bounce back after the gut blow of betrayal, Schorn is the friend who guides you through this nightmare and gives you hope for a better life ahead.
Download or read book Plugged in written by Patti M. Valkenburg and published by Yale University Press. This book was released on 2017-01-01 with total page 341 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Cover -- Half-title -- Title -- Copyright -- Dedication -- Contents -- Preface -- 1 Youth and Media -- 2 Then and Now -- 3 Themes and Theoretical Perspectives -- 4 Infants, Toddlers, and Preschoolers -- 5 Children -- 6 Adolescents -- 7 Media and Violence -- 8 Media and Emotions -- 9 Advertising and Commercialism -- 10 Media and Sex -- 11 Media and Education -- 12 Digital Games -- 13 Social Media -- 14 Media and Parenting -- 15 The End -- Notes -- Acknowledgments -- Index -- A -- B -- C -- D -- E -- F -- G -- H -- I -- J -- K -- L -- M -- N -- O -- P -- Q -- R -- S -- T -- U -- V -- W -- X -- Y -- Z
Book Synopsis A Pickle for the Knowing Ones by : Timothy Dexter
Download or read book A Pickle for the Knowing Ones written by Timothy Dexter and published by . This book was released on 1848 with total page 44 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Book Synopsis You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start in the Morning by : Celia Rivenbark
Download or read book You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start in the Morning written by Celia Rivenbark and published by Macmillan. This book was released on 2009-09-01 with total page 256 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the author of the bestselling classics We're Just Like You, Only Prettier, and Bless Your Heart, Tramp, comes a collection of essays so funny, you'll shoot co'cola out of your nose. Topics include such gems as: • Why Miss North Carolina is too nice to hate • How Gwyneth Paltrow wants to improve your pathetic life • Strapped for cash? Try cat whispering • Sex every night for a year? How do you wrap that? • Get yer Wassail on: It's carolin' time • Airlines serving up one hot mess • Action figure Jesus • Why Clay Aiken ain't marrying your glandular daughter • And much more! Complete with a treasure trove of Celia's genuine southern recipes, You Can't Drink All Day if You Don't Start in the Morning is sure to appeal to anyone who lives south of something.
Book Synopsis Girls Gone Skank by : Patrice A. Oppliger
Download or read book Girls Gone Skank written by Patrice A. Oppliger and published by McFarland. This book was released on 2015-02-18 with total page 266 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Instead of advancing women’s social and professional empowerment, popular culture trends appear to be backsliding into the blatant sexual exploitation of women and girls at younger and younger ages. This study investigates the effects of mass marketed sexual images and cultural trends on the behaviors and attitudes of young girls and describes many ways in which young girls are increasingly taught to go to outrageous lengths in seeking male attention. Topics include the powerful effects of cultural phenomena such as revealing fashions, plastic surgery, and beauty pageants in influencing teen and preteen girls to willingly participate in and promote their own sexualization. These chapters also explore other cultural factors contributing to this early sexualization of young girls, including absentee parenting and material overindulgence. Later chapters focus on the sexual representations of females in the mass entertainment media, focusing specifically on how popular magazines, television programs, films, and the Internet prey upon, promote, and reinforce young girls’ physical and sexual insecurities.
Book Synopsis Beautiful Disaster Signed Limited Edition by : Jamie McGuire
Download or read book Beautiful Disaster Signed Limited Edition written by Jamie McGuire and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2012-11-27 with total page 416 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Abby Abernathy is re-inventing herself as the good girl as she begins her freshman year at college, which is why she must resist lean, cut, and tattooed Travis Maddox, a classic bad boy.
Book Synopsis Bless Your Heart, Tramp! by : Celia Rivenbark
Download or read book Bless Your Heart, Tramp! written by Celia Rivenbark and published by Macmillan + ORM. This book was released on 2006-05-30 with total page 232 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the wickedly hilarious pen of Southern humorist Celia Rivenbark comes a collection of essays that brings to mind Dave Barry (in high heels) or Jeff Foxworthy (in a prom dress). Step into the wacky world of "womanless wedding" fund-raisers, in which Bubbas wear boas. Meet two sisters who fight rural boredom by washing Budweiser cans and cutting them into pieces to make clothing. Learn why the word snow sends any right-thinking Southerner careening to the Food Lion for extra loaves of bread and little else. Humor columnist and slightly crazed belle-by-birth Celia Rivenbark tackles these and other lard-laden subjects in Bless Your Heart, Tramp, a hilarious look at Southern---and just plain human---foibles, up-close and personal. So pour yourself a glass of sweet tea and curl up on the pie-azza with Bless Your Heart, Tramp.
Book Synopsis Nice Is Just a Place in France by : Betches
Download or read book Nice Is Just a Place in France written by Betches and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2013-03-12 with total page 336 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: LOOK, MAYBE YOU’RE A NICE GIRL, but we’re guessing you’re more like us or you probably wouldn’t have picked up this book. Not that we have a problem with girls who are nice people. But being nice is just not the way to get what you want. And this book is about getting what you want. Not in like a finding happiness, giving back to the world, being grateful for what you have sort of way. But in a ruling your world, being the most desired, powerful badass in the room way, so you can come out on top of any situation: guys, career, friends, enemies, whatever. How does a betch make that happen? Here are some highlights: DON’T BE EASY. DON’T BE POOR. DON’T BE UGLY. We didn’t come up with these life lessons. We’re just the ones who wrote it all down. This is not self-help. Self-help is for fat people and divorcées. This is how to deal with your problems when you have no problems. You’re welcome.
Book Synopsis The Height of Rudeness by : Celia Rivenbark
Download or read book The Height of Rudeness written by Celia Rivenbark and published by St. Martin's Press. This book was released on 2013-08-27 with total page 47 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this short e-original The Height of Rudeness, readers will get 5 essays - one never-before-published and 4 "sneak peeks" at the kind of manners advice Celia Rivenbark will be dishing up in her upcoming etiquette book RUDE BITCHES MAKE ME TIRED. Have you been "wait-listed" for your friend's wedding? Or, worse, have you been told, via engraved stationery, that you should "Please don't save the date"? This odious and ill-mannered trend must stop! How did it start? How should we cope with such an audacious display of asshattery? Leave it to Mama Celia to help in times like these. And a word of warning to brides-to-be? Quit showing off your engagement bling to your Facebook friends. They all expect to be invited and they're already shopping for Soda Streams.
Book Synopsis You Don't Sweat Much for a Fat Girl by : Celia Rivenbark
Download or read book You Don't Sweat Much for a Fat Girl written by Celia Rivenbark and published by Macmillan. This book was released on 2011-08-16 with total page 164 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the bestselling, award-winning author of You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start In The Morning, comes another collection of hilarious observations that will resonate with women, mothers, and girlfriends everywhere In her newest wickedly irreverent humor collection, Celia Rivenbark cracks up while getting her downward facing dog on, pines for a world in which every mom gets to behave like Betty Draper and wonders why everybody's so excited about the Science Fair when there aren't even any rides. In it you'll find essays on such topics as: - Menopause Spurs Thoughts of Death and Turkey - I Dreamed a Dream That My Lashes Were Long - Twitter Woes: I've Got Plenty of Characters, Just No Character - Movie To-Do List: Cook Like Julia, Adopt Really Big Kid - Charlie Bit Your Finger? Good! And other thoughts on the virus that is YouTube And much more! For any woman who longs for the good old days when Jane Fonda in legwarmers was the only one who saw you exercise, YOU DON'T SWEAT MUCH FOR A FAT GIRL is comfort food in book form.
Download or read book Dad to Dad written by David L. Hill and published by . This book was released on 2012 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Dad to Dad is a modern-day, humorous, helpful guide to parenting and your child -- from birth through toddlerhood and beyond -- written by a dad who's been through it all. from coughs and colds to sleeping, sore throats, time outs and television, with Dad to Dad, you'll have the advice you need to address day-to-day issues like a champ.
Download or read book Dear Martin written by Nic Stone and published by Ember. This book was released on 2018-09-04 with total page 242 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Powerful, wrenching.” –JOHN GREEN, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Turtles All the Way Down "Raw and gripping." –JASON REYNOLDS, New York Times bestselling coauthor of All American Boys "A must-read!” –ANGIE THOMAS, #1 New York Times bestselling author of The Hate U Give Raw, captivating, and undeniably real, Nic Stone joins industry giants Jason Reynolds and Walter Dean Myers as she boldly tackles American race relations in this stunning #1 New York Times bestselling debut, a William C. Morris Award Finalist. Justyce McAllister is a good kid, an honor student, and always there to help a friend—but none of that matters to the police officer who just put him in handcuffs. Despite leaving his rough neighborhood behind, he can't escape the scorn of his former peers or the ridicule of his new classmates. Justyce looks to the teachings of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. for answers. But do they hold up anymore? He starts a journal to Dr. King to find out. Then comes the day Justyce goes driving with his best friend, Manny, windows rolled down, music turned up—way up, sparking the fury of a white off-duty cop beside them. Words fly. Shots are fired. Justyce and Manny are caught in the crosshairs. In the media fallout, it's Justyce who is under attack. "Vivid and powerful." -Booklist, Starred Review "A visceral portrait of a young man reckoning with the ugly, persistent violence of social injustice." -Publishers Weekly
Download or read book Pimp written by Iceberg Slim and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2011-05-10 with total page 308 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “[In Pimp], Iceberg Slim breaks down some of the coldest, capitalist concepts I’ve ever heard in my life.” —Dave Chappelle, from his Nextflix special The Bird Revelation Pimp sent shockwaves throughout the literary world when it published in 1969. Iceberg Slim’s autobiographical novel offered readers a never-before-seen account of the sex trade, and an unforgettable look at the mores of Chicago’s street life during the 1940s, 50s, and 60s. In the preface, Slim says it best, “In this book, I will take you, the reader, with me into the secret inner world of the pimp.” An immersive experience unlike anything before it, Pimp would go on to sell millions of copies, with translations throughout the world. And it would have a profound impact upon generations of writers, entertainers, and filmmakers, making it the classic hustler’s tale that never seems to go out of style.
