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Sausagey Santa
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Download or read book Sausagey Santa written by Carlton Mellick and published by Eraserhead Press. This book was released on 2006 with total page 128 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "...One snowy Christmas Eve, while visiting the Fry family, Sausagey Santa is attacked by an evil force that is driven to destroy Christmas forever. ...Santa calls upon Matthew Fry and his wife, Decapitron (a brutish warrior woman with a strange Christmas fetish and a candy cane sword), to help get it back and save Christmas for everyone."--Back cover.
Book Synopsis Sausagey Santa by : Carlton Mellick, III
Download or read book Sausagey Santa written by Carlton Mellick, III and published by . This book was released on 2013-10 with total page 132 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Santa isn't the jolly old elf as portrayed in Children's stories. He's a bit more grotesque than that. His eyes are pimento-stuffed olives, his teeth are walnuts, and his body is made of sausages. One snowy Christmas Eve, while visiting the Fry family, Sausagey Santa is attacked by an evil force that is driven to destroy Christmas forever. It is an anti-Christmas spirit that loathes everything having to do with children and Jesus. His name is Frosty the Neo-Nazi Snowman. After Frosty steals his magic bag of presents, Santa calls upon Matthew Fry and his wife, Decapitron (a brutish warrior woman with a peculiar Christmas fetish and a candy cane sword), to help get it back and save Christmas for everyone. It's the greatest sausage-spewing, elf-raping, zombie-killing, Transformer- fucking, reindeer-exploding, snowman-battling, adventure-rocking, bizarro Christmas story OF ALL TIME!!!
Download or read book Bucket of Face written by Eric Hendrixson and published by Eric Hendrixson. This book was released on 2010-10 with total page 110 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Thirteen years after a police officer searching a suspected child molester's home spilled a vial of silver pollen, America is still struggling with how to recognize its sentient fruit population. Charles is just a normal guy working at a doughnut shop until an apple and a banana shoot each other in a mafia dispute, leaving a briefcase full of foreign currency and a specimen bucket at the corner booth. When Charles turns the wiseguys into doughnuts and steals their luggage, hoping for a better life for himself and his kiwi fruit girlfriend, he finds himself in the middle of a mafia war. As his girlfriend travels the DC metro area, selling off the contents of the bucket, Charles finds he is the target of a seasoned hit-tomato, who happens to be the biggest Michael Jackson fan who ever lived.
Book Synopsis The Ultra Fuckers by : Carlton Mellick Iii
Download or read book The Ultra Fuckers written by Carlton Mellick Iii and published by . This book was released on 2008 with total page 112 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Tony dreads the idea of going to his wife's company dinner party in Eagle Hills; the new upper-middleclass gated community that just popped up outside of Scottsdale, AZ. He hates these Southwestern-style planned suburban neighborhoods. All of the streets look the same. All of the houses look the same. All of the people look the same. Because everything in Eagle Hills looks exactly the same, Tony has trouble finding the dinner party. He quickly becomes lost in the sea of red tile roofs. The streets seem to go on forever. The addresses don't seem to make any sense. After hours of navigating the suburban labyrinth, Tony discovers that there is something terribly wrong with the Eagle Hills gated community. There is something unnatural about the houses around him. There is something inhuman about the people staring at him through the windows. And no matter how far he drives, he can't seem to find his way out. Ultra Fuckers is a work of absurd suburban horror in the tradition of Mellick's previous short novel, The Menstruating Mall.
Book Synopsis Jack and Mr. Grin by : Andersen Prunty
Download or read book Jack and Mr. Grin written by Andersen Prunty and published by . This book was released on 2008 with total page 222 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Jack Orange is a twentysomething guy who works at a place called The Tent packing dirt in boxes and shipping them off to exotic, unheard of locales. He thinks about his girlfriend, Gina Black, and the ring he hopes to surprise her with. But when he returns home one day, Gina isn't there. He receives a strange call from a man who sounds likes he is smiling-- Mr. Grin. He says he has Gina. He gives Jack twenty-four hours to find her--Publisher's description.
Book Synopsis The Ballad of a Slow Poisoner by : Andrew Goldfarb
Download or read book The Ballad of a Slow Poisoner written by Andrew Goldfarb and published by . This book was released on 2007 with total page 144 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Herein are the singular adventures of one Millford Mutterwurst, who one day makes the unpleasant discovery that his elbows are becoming flatter - an unpleasant effect of the nefarious act of slow poisoning. He is soon joined by a blue and globular companion named Slub Glub and one translucent monkey in a frenetic balloon voyage to dangerous isles and disturbing planets in a desperate attempt to escape this deadly withering. A tale told in eighty dizzying chapters, all of them exceedingly short, and filled with strange songs and oblique illustrations.
Book Synopsis Adolf in Wonderland by : Carlton Mellick
Download or read book Adolf in Wonderland written by Carlton Mellick and published by . This book was released on 2007 with total page 188 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In an alternate version of the future where Hitler had conquered the entire world during WW2 and developed society into his vision of utopia, an SS officer is on a mission to find and exterminate the last imperfect human on Earth. Following his trail leads the young Nazi to a small town hidden in the middle of the desert; a place that has been cut off from society for so long that it has developed its own strange and disturbing culture. Thus begins Mellick's dreamlike adventure that takes a young descendent of Adolf Hitler's design and sends him down the rabbit hole into a world of imperfection and disorder, where even the laws of reality itself don't seem to apply. A tribute to both Franz Kafka and Lewis Carroll, "Adolf in Wonderland" is a perfect read for fans of the bizarro genre.
Book Synopsis The Egg Man by : Carlton Mellick Iii
Download or read book The Egg Man written by Carlton Mellick Iii and published by . This book was released on 2008 with total page 190 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Book Synopsis Shark Hunting in Paradise Garden by : Cameron Pierce
Download or read book Shark Hunting in Paradise Garden written by Cameron Pierce and published by . This book was released on 2008 with total page 136 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A group of fanatical religious tourists from the future travel back in time to meet Adam and Eve. Unfortunately, their time ship crashes, killing the majority of the crew (including the leprechauns) and leaving them stranded in this strange shark-infested land. Among the survivors are: Ernest who has the ability to turn people into mannequins, Ira who wields a razor-edged bible for a weapon, Wayne a giant wizard head with fat lizard legs, Donkey the hunchback halfwit, Anton the birdman, Rattlesnake Doctor, Ancestor, and Sturgeonwolf. This cult of deranged priests soon discover that Eden is a far more surreal and dangerous place than they could ever have imagined. It is going to take everything they've got in order to survive long enough to find another way home--Publisher's description.
Download or read book The Morrell Magazine written by and published by . This book was released on 1960 with total page 296 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Download or read book Sales and Idea Book written by and published by . This book was released on 1950 with total page 216 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Book Synopsis Christmas on Crack by : Carlton Mellick Iii
Download or read book Christmas on Crack written by Carlton Mellick Iii and published by . This book was released on 2010-12 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: It's the dark and seedy side of Christmas that you didn't know about. A Christmas underworld where Santa gets dominated by peppermint women and Frosty is a transvestite stripper. There's elf sluts, toy orgies, and giant flesh-eating Christmas crabs that shoot lasers. That's right. Lasers. It's the holiday season, bitches, so strap on your sugar plum ball gag, bend yourself over the Yule log, and get ready for Kris Kringle to shove some Christmas cheer up your ass!
Download or read book Illinois Food Guide written by and published by . This book was released on 2002 with total page 294 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Book Synopsis Dealing with People You Can’t Stand, Revised and Expanded Third Edition: How to Bring Out the Best in People at Their Worst by : Dr Rick Brinkman
Download or read book Dealing with People You Can’t Stand, Revised and Expanded Third Edition: How to Bring Out the Best in People at Their Worst written by Dr Rick Brinkman and published by McGraw Hill Professional. This book was released on 2012-06-13 with total page 306 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Dealing With People You Cant Stand offers practical tactics for resolving relationship challenges at work and home. It shows readers how to get things done, even when they are dealing with rude, crude, and inconsiderate people who have the ability to derail anything good that can happen
Book Synopsis Satan Burger (15th Anniversary Edition) by : Carlton Mellick III
Download or read book Satan Burger (15th Anniversary Edition) written by Carlton Mellick III and published by Eraserhead Press. This book was released on 2016-07-01 with total page 296 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When Satan Burger was first being passed around among teenage punks and fans of weird art and film, there was nothing else like it. A book of rebellious spirit that simplistically captured the postmodern malaise of a culture obsessed with consumerism. It quickly gained an underground following, was transcribed by fans and bootlegged online, was translated into Russian and made its way around the world attracting the attention of readers bored with typical mainstream fare. Combining a satirical wit and style on par with legendary humorists such as Kurt Vonnegut and Russell Edson with the crazy punk ethos of cult film directors such as Terry Gilliam, David Lynch, and Takashi Miike, this was a book overflowing with so many new ideas and absurd philosophies that it not only launched the career of underground author Carlton Mellick III, but inspired an entire literary movement. For the fifteenth anniversary of the release of this Bizarro Fiction classic, Eraserhead Press is thrilled to present this special hardcover edition, featuring an introduction by splatterpunk legend John Skipp, illustrations by Ryan Ward, and a new preface by the author. Satan Burger explores a new kind of apocalypse. Not an apocalypse caused by disease or nuclear war, but an apocalypse of boredom. A plague of monotony has spread across the countryside, sucking all passion and inspiration out of everyone over the age of twenty-five, leaving only the disenfranchised youth to fend for themselves in a world crumbling around them. Featuring a narrator who sees his body from a third-person perspective, a man whose flesh is dead but his body parts are alive and running amok, an overweight messiah, the personal life of the Grim Reaper, a race of women who feed on male orgasms, and a motley group of squatter punks that team up with the devil to find their place in a world that doesn't want them anymore.
Book Synopsis Dealing with People You Can't Stand, Fourth Edition: How to Bring Out the Best in People at Their Worst by : Rick Brinkman
Download or read book Dealing with People You Can't Stand, Fourth Edition: How to Bring Out the Best in People at Their Worst written by Rick Brinkman and published by McGraw Hill Professional. This book was released on 2024-06-04 with total page 449 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The classic guide to bringing out the best in people at their worst—fully updated for a world that’s meaner, nastier, and more polarized than ever Today, new technologies, the increased role of social media, and the ubiquity of remote work have resulted in more polarized workplaces, the breakdown of social mores, and downright rude behavior. These days, it seems like there are more people we can’t stand—not fewer—and, too often, if we aren’t yelling at each other, we’ve just quit talking altogether. The global bestseller Dealing with People You Can’t Stand has been helping people make the best of tough situations for nearly three decades, and this new edition has been fully updated to address the needs of our time. You'll learn how to get along and get things done when you’re dealing with people who have the uncanny ability to sabotage, derail, and interfere with your plans, needs, and wants. Brand-new chapters cover: Narcissism Polarization Remote work Meetings Video communication Social media communication Communicating with relatives The authors explain how to use sophisticated listening techniques to unlock the doors to others’ hearts and minds; turn conflict into cooperation by reducing the differences between us; and mitigate the destructive behavior of all types of difficult people. Whether you’re dealing with a manager who won’t let you get a word in edgewise in a virtual or hybrid meeting, a coworker who holds beliefs you find extreme, a family member who doesn’t respect your boundaries, or trolls on social media, Dealing with People You Can’t Stand provides the tools for bringing out the best in people at their worst.
Book Synopsis Dealing with People You Can't Stand: How to Bring Out the Best in People at Their Worst by : Dr. Rick Brinkman
Download or read book Dealing with People You Can't Stand: How to Bring Out the Best in People at Their Worst written by Dr. Rick Brinkman and published by McGraw Hill Professional. This book was released on 2002-02-27 with total page 253 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The international bestseller--more than 500,000 copies sold! With their 1994 international bestseller, Dealing with People You Can't Stand, Drs. Rick Brinkman and Rick Kirschner armed a civility-starved world with no-nonsense strategies for dealing with difficult people with tact and skill. Since then, cell phones, the Internet, voice mail, and other technological wonders designed to bring people closer together have only made it that much harder to avoid "people you can't stand;" even worse, they've also created exciting new ways for annoying people to realize their talent for being pains in the butt. Updated and revised for the digital age, this new edition of Brinkman and Kirschner's bestselling guide shows readers how to successfully combat the whiners, grenades, tanks, snipers, close-talkers, pedants, and other rude, crude, and inconsiderate people who can ruin your day at work, in stores, on the street, in restaurants, at the movies, in waiting rooms, by fax, phone, and E-mail, and in cyberspace.
