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Pages From The Pizza Crows
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Book Synopsis Pages from the Pizza Crows by : Evan Witmer
Download or read book Pages from the Pizza Crows written by Evan Witmer and published by Odd Fiction. This book was released on 2019-11-27 with total page 323 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In exchange for pizza, a beautiful crow delivered stories to my windowsill. I've collected those stories, here, for your amusement and observation. The genres gravitate towards surrealist fantasy with a touch of horror and a thread of comedy."Bedfellows" follows the story of a boy and a girl who are attached at the hip by supernatural means. "Belligamy" tells the tale of a powerful curse forcing married men to fight one another in order to protect their brides. "Captured by Animals" details an author’s adventures spying on people in the woods to write his romance stories. "The Red Constellation" is Law & Order SVU meets Cosmic Horror. "Young Adult Series Simulator" tells the story of that date you went on at the bookstore. "F1" is about a pregnant horse. "Nine-Tenths An Ape" is the Monkey's Paw but in reverse. "Lethe" asks, how old were you when you had your first memory? Maybe a little too old? "The Bright Idea Room" reminds you that it's the environment that kills you in the end. Not the serial killer. "Satan's Spies" is about a friendly group of businessmen and their obsession with strip clubs.New for September 2020: The book has been reedited by professional editor Vincent Parisi.
Book Synopsis Pages from the Pizza Crows by : Witmer
Download or read book Pages from the Pizza Crows written by Witmer and published by . This book was released on 2023-09-19 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Hardcover edition: A new version of my first novel made to celebrate my early successes. Includes new professionally done artwork [cover reveal 7/19]. Also includes bonus content in the back--an afterword highlighting my tumultuous relationship with sudden popularity and unavoidable infamy. In exchange for pizza, a beautiful crow delivered stories to my windowsill. I've collected those stories, here, for your amusement and observation. The genres gravitate towards surrealist fantasy with a touch of horror and a thread of comedy."Bedfellows" follows the story of a boy and a girl who are attached at the hip by supernatural means. "Belligamy" tells the tale of a powerful curse forcing married men to fight one another in order to protect their brides. "Captured by Animals" details an author's adventures spying on people in the woods to write his romance stories. "The Red Constellation" is Law & Order SVU meets Cosmic Horror. "Young Adult Series Simulator" tells the story of that date you went on at the bookstore. "F1" is about a pregnant horse. "Nine-Tenths An Ape" is the Monkey's Paw but in reverse. "Lethe" asks, how old were you when you had your first memory? Maybe a little too old? "The Bright Idea Room" reminds you that it's the environment that kills you in the end. Not the serial killer. "Satan's Spies" is about a friendly group of businessmen and their obsession with strip clubs.
Book Synopsis How To Burn This Book by : Evan Witmer
Download or read book How To Burn This Book written by Evan Witmer and published by Odd Fiction. This book was released on 2021-12-15 with total page 377 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Step one of burning a book is finding a disagreeable premise within its interior to justify the act. In order to simplify this process for the reader, each short story in this collection is followed by a precise reason the short story should be immolated, opined by the author’s many critics. "Lucky Girl Noir" is about a hard-boiled cop solving the murder of a ‘Lucky Girl’, one of many powered women born with probability consistenly in their favor. Burning this story would be a much needed win in the war against plagiarism. "Three Days West" is an acid-Western about a pair of turophile cowboys exploiting their otherworldly connection in frontier Colorado. This story deserves burning for stealing the modesty of American pulp heroes. "Zantar" is Tarzan but with aliens and raccoons. Burning seems appropriate, as it acts as a continuation of the author’s insatiable hunger for theriocide. "Sea Creatures" is a sapphic love story between a siren and a mermaid. The story deserves to be burned for suggesting bras are a form of art. "Lizard People Take Orlando" tells the story of Zaffre Davis, a young grad student running for mayor of Orlando while keeping his double life as a scalie a secret. Burning should be considered due to its depictions of the furry fandom as solely affiliating with Democrats. "The Spirit Realm" is about the survivor of a mass party poisoning who wakes up to find he can talk to and interrogate bottles of alcohol. Not a single character is represented by a bottle of absinthe; a crime best punished by burning. "The Pimp That Slapped the Ripper" is about the fall of Jack the Ripper at the hands of a violent, young procurer who will protect her property at all costs. The author’s new softness has robbed the story of certain graphic, historical details; their omission begets burning. "Washed" is the story of a man who loses all his memories when he takes a shower. Burn this one to effectively eliminate the author’s ugly, stinky past. "An American Weekend" is about a boy’s considerably awful week, and his preceding visitation by the embodiments of Friday, Saturday and Sunday; who guide him out of his funk. Turn it to ashes; this interpretation of the weekend reeks of upper-class privilege. "Roadwork" is about the daily struggles of a lemurtologist, an exorcist working for the DMV whose job is to remove ghosts from the road after a horrific accident. Tossing this story into the fire could fracture the ego of a hate-filled author obsessed with smudging the good name of the DMV.
Book Synopsis Digest: Ten Short Stories by Convicted & Plausible People-Eaters by : Evan Witmer
Download or read book Digest: Ten Short Stories by Convicted & Plausible People-Eaters written by Evan Witmer and published by Odd Fiction. This book was released on 2021-01-01 with total page 355 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: I've tracked down ten authors who have, at some point, participated in the act of cannibalism. I've collected one short story from each writer and combined them here for your amusement and observation. Isaac Cone presents “Margaritaville”, Jimmy Buffet’s hit song reinterpreted as a southern gothic. Sandeyu Yamamoto writes “Antiquing” about a family with a rare type of OCD where they haunt the object they most obsessed over. John Doe submits “Jesus Christ Meets the Chupacabra” which is exactly what it sounds like. Arsenio Alonso adds “A Vacancy in Staffordshire” about a team of researchers hunting for black-eyed kids in the British wilderness. Greige Wagner contributes “The Life & Times of a Rockefeller Pregnancy Zombie” about a girl who is hypnotized by the New World Order to feel unfathomable pain unless she uses her every egg for procreation. Mago Schlecter's brings us “Ring the Belles”, a mix between historical fiction and a slasher where the villain only kills the teenaged daughters of slave-owners in the Antebellum South. Cassius Crown surrenders "Zooland” about a cursed town where everyone is reduced to their id at night becoming either vicious wolves or delicious deer. Bonny Bride sends “Glee-Maiden”, a story about a woman seeking to make it in the male-dominated field of killer clowning. Matthew Hoga pens “Comorbidity”, the story of two different plagues of zombie with wildly different styles that collide in the ruins of Zhengzhou, China. Joss Iger authors “Six O’s”, the most light-hearted of the bunch, about a man who can only orgasm six more times before he can never do it again. I share these stories in hopes of emphasizing the unique voices oft ignored in favor of traditional masticators.
Book Synopsis Fox and Crow Are Not Friends by : Melissa Wiley
Download or read book Fox and Crow Are Not Friends written by Melissa Wiley and published by Random House Books for Young Readers. This book was released on 2012-08-07 with total page 50 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Fox and Crow can agree on two things: their love of cheese and loathing of each other. These cagey animals will do whatever they can to outwit their sworn enemy and claim sole possession of the prized cheese they keep finding. But they are too caught up in their plotting and planning to realize they've picked the wrong house to steal from—since the mother of the house is one fed up Mama Bear who knows exactly how to contend with freeloaders.
Book Synopsis Hollywood Crows by : Joseph Wambaugh
Download or read book Hollywood Crows written by Joseph Wambaugh and published by Little, Brown. This book was released on 2008-03-25 with total page 448 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In a super follow-up to Hollywood Station, Wambaugh returns to the beat he knows best, taking readers on a darkly funny ride-along with a cast of flawed LAPD cops and eccentric lowlifes you won't forget. When LAPD cops Hollywood Nate and Bix Rumstead find themselves caught up with bombshell Margot Aziz, they think they're just having some fun. But in Hollywood, nothing is ever what it seems. To them, Margot is a harmless socialite, stuck in the middle of an ugly divorce from the nefarious nightclub-owner Ali Aziz. What Nate and Bix don't know is that Margot's no helpless victim: the femme fatale is setting them both up. But Ms. Aziz isn't the only one with a deadly plan.
Download or read book Crow’S Row written by Julie Hockley and published by iUniverse. This book was released on 2014-03-25 with total page 410 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: For college student Emily Sheppard, the thought of spending a summer alone in New York is much more preferable than spending it in France with her parents. Just completing her freshman year at Callister University, Emily faces a quiet summer in the city slums, supporting herself by working at the campus library. During one of her jogs through the nearby cemetery while visiting her brother Bills grave, Emily witnesses a brutal killingand then she blacks out. When Emily regains consciousness, she realizes shes been kidnapped by a young crime boss and his gang. She is hurled into a secret underworld, wondering why she is still alive and for how long. Held captive in rural Vermont, she tries to make sense of her situation and what it means. While uncovering secrets about her brother and his untimely death, Emily falls in love with her very rich and very dangerous captor, twenty-six-year-old Cameron. She understands its a forbidden love and one that wont allow her to return to her previous life. But love may not be enough to save Emily when no one even knows she is missing.
Download or read book Crows written by Candace Savage and published by Greystone Books. This book was released on 2015-04-20 with total page 137 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A treasure trove of stories, poems, and information on the brainy, black-feathered bird that’s rich in insight and humor. This revised and expanded edition of Candace Savage’s best-selling book about ravens and crows is enhanced by additional paintings, drawings, and photos, as well as a fascinating selection of first-person stories and poems about remarkable encounters with crows. In one story, a pack of crows brilliantly thwarts an attack by a Golden Eagle; in another, a mischievous crow rescues the author from grief. And in a third piece, after nursing a battered baby crow back to health until it flies off with other crows, Louise Erdrich hauntingly describes her altered awareness as she listens for the “dark laugh” of crows while she works. Based on two decades of audacious research by scientists around the world, the book also provides an unprecedented, evidence-based glimpse into corvids’ intellectual, social, and emotional lives. But whether viewed through the lens of science, myth, or everyday experience, the result is always the same. These birds are so smart—and so mysterious—they take your breath away. Published in Partnership with the David Suzuki Institute. Praise for Crows “A beautifully crafted celebration of these birds.” —Nature “A deft juxtaposition of interesting anecdotes and firsthand accounts of scientific discoveries.” —Canadian Literature “Surprising avian revelations are contained within the pages of Savage’s glorious festival of crow arcana.” —Alberta Views
Book Synopsis How Do Meerkats Order Pizza? by : Brooke Barker
Download or read book How Do Meerkats Order Pizza? written by Brooke Barker and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2023-10-24 with total page 200 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this “pleasing and informative” (Kirkus Reviews) illustrated nonfiction book for middle grade readers, Brooke Barker of Sad Animal Facts introduces readers to incredible animals and the bizarre things human scientists do to understand them. Did you know that crows never forget a face? Or that jaguars have a favorite cologne? Have you ever wondered how to pet a yeti crab? Or whether dogs can tell if you’re smiling? And just what is a burrowing bettong? Meet these weird, wonderful animals and the equally weird and wonderful scientists who study them. From crafting fake poop to slurping up bugs with a straw, there’s nothing these amazing humans won’t do to help us learn more about the animals around us. Packed with fascinating facts, this hilarious book from the bestselling creator of Sad Animal Facts reveals secrets like why roosters crow and how meerkats make decisions as a group—and how humans can better understand the wild creatures we share the planet with.
Book Synopsis Just Think! Evaluation - Gr 5 by : Cindy Barden
Download or read book Just Think! Evaluation - Gr 5 written by Cindy Barden and published by Milliken Publishing Company. This book was released on 2000-09-01 with total page 9 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This packet is designed to teach critical thinking skills in conjuction with Benjamin Bloom's hierarchy of educational objectives. These engaging activities will teach students to make logical deductions, identify "the moral of the story," analyze criteria, decide what information is relevant and what is not, spot common attributes, and more! Answer key is included.
Download or read book The Pizza Book written by Stephen Krensky and published by Cartwheel Books. This book was released on 1992 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Explains the origins of pizza and gives directions for preparing a pizza.
Book Synopsis California Pizza Kitchen Family Cookbook by : Larry Flax
Download or read book California Pizza Kitchen Family Cookbook written by Larry Flax and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2020-12-29 with total page 133 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Bring the California Pizza Kitchen experience to your home with nearly 50 recipes and inspiring color photographs found in the California Pizza Kitchen Family Cookbook, which shows you how to make popular dishes from the restaurant known for its eclectic pizzas. Crowd-pleasing recipes that are easy to make and appeal to both adults and children include pizza like Jamaican Jerk Chicken and other favorites like Thai Crunch Salad. This book will show you how to make three kinds of pizza dough with step-by-step instructions, and it even presents ideas for create-your-own pizza parties.
Book Synopsis I've Been Traded for a Pizza: to 10; Pages:11 to 20; Pages:21 to 30; Pages:31 to 33 by : Charles M. Schulz
Download or read book I've Been Traded for a Pizza: to 10; Pages:11 to 20; Pages:21 to 30; Pages:31 to 33 written by Charles M. Schulz and published by . This book was released on 2014 with total page 33 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Download or read book Crowbones written by Anne Bishop and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2022-03-08 with total page 369 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this engrossing and gripping fantasy set in the world of the New York Times bestselling Others series, an inn owner and her friends must find a killer—before it’s too late.… Crowbones will gitcha if you don’t watch out! Deep in the territory controlled by the Others—shape-shifters, vampires, and even deadlier paranormal beings—Vicki DeVine has made a new life for herself running The Jumble, a rustic resort. When she decides to host a gathering of friends and guests for Trickster Night, at first everything is going well between the humans and the Others. But then someone arrives dressed as Crowbones, the Crowgard bogeyman. When the impostor is killed along with a shape-shifting Crow, and the deaths are clearly connected, everyone fears that the real Crowbones may have come to The Jumble—and that could mean serious trouble. To “encourage” humans to help them find some answers, the Elders and Elementals close all the roads, locking in suspects and victims alike. Now Vicki, human police chief Grimshaw, vampire lawyer Ilya Sanguinati, and the rest of their friends have to figure out who is manipulating events designed to pit humans against Others—and who may have put Vicki DeVine in the crosshairs of a powerful hunter.
Book Synopsis Just Think! Analysis - Gr 5 by : Cindy Barden
Download or read book Just Think! Analysis - Gr 5 written by Cindy Barden and published by Milliken Publishing Company. This book was released on 2000-09-01 with total page 8 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This packet is designed to teach critical thinking skills in conjuction with Benjamin Bloom's hierarchy of educational objectives. These engaging activities will teach students to collect and organize data, identify cause and effect, use analogies, make logically sound decisions, and more! Answer key is included.
Book Synopsis How Do Meerkats Order Pizza? by : Brooke Barker
Download or read book How Do Meerkats Order Pizza? written by Brooke Barker and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2022-11-22 with total page 198 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this “pleasing and informative” (Kirkus Reviews) illustrated nonfiction book for middle grade readers, Brooke Barker of Sad Animal Facts introduces readers to incredible animals and the bizarre things human scientists do to understand them. Did you know that crows never forget a face? Or that jaguars have a favorite cologne? Have you ever wondered how to pet a yeti crab? Or whether dogs can tell if you’re smiling? And just what is a burrowing bettong? Meet these weird, wonderful animals and the equally weird and wonderful scientists who study them. From crafting fake poop to slurping up bugs with a straw, there’s nothing these amazing humans won’t do to help us learn more about the animals around us. Packed with fascinating facts, this hilarious book from the bestselling creator of Sad Animal Facts reveals secrets like why roosters crow and how meerkats make decisions as a group—and how humans can better understand the wild creatures we share the planet with.
Book Synopsis The Lives of Saints by : Leigh Bardugo
Download or read book The Lives of Saints written by Leigh Bardugo and published by Imprint. This book was released on 2020-10-06 with total page 117 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: See the Grishaverse come to life on screen with the Netflix series, Shadow and Bone. As seen in the show, bring home this artifact from the world, complete with stunning full-color illustrations alongside stories of the Grishaverse’s most infamous saints, including Sankta Alina of the Fold, The Starless Saint, and Sankta Neyar, who forged the legendary blade featured in Season 2 –- streaming now! Dive into the epic world of international bestselling author Leigh Bardugo with this beautifully illustrated replica of The Lives of Saints, the Istorii Sankt’ya, featuring tales of saints drawn from the beloved novels and beyond. Out of the pages of the Shadow and Bone trilogy, from the hands of Alina Starkov to yours, the Istorii Sankt’ya is a magical keepsake from the Grishaverse. These tales include miracles and martyrdoms from familiar saints like Sankta Lizabeta of the Roses and Sankt Ilya in Chains, to the strange and obscure stories of Sankta Ursula, Sankta Maradi, and the Starless Saint. As seen on screen in the Netflix series, this beautiful collection includes stunning full-color illustrations of each story. Read all the books in the Grishaverse! The Shadow and Bone Trilogy (previously published as The Grisha Trilogy) Shadow and Bone Siege and Storm Ruin and Rising The Six of Crows Duology Six of Crows Crooked Kingdom The King of Scars Duology King of Scars Rule of Wolves The Language of Thorns: Midnight Tales and Dangerous Magic The Severed Moon: A Year-Long Journal of Magic The Lives of Saints Demon in the Wood Graphic Novel Praise for the Grishaverse “A master of fantasy.” —The Huffington Post “Utterly, extremely bewitching.” —The Guardian “This is what fantasy is for.” —The New York Times Book Review “A world that feels real enough to have its own passport stamp.” —NPR “The darker it gets for the good guys, the better.” —Entertainment Weekly “Sultry, sweeping and picturesque. . . . Impossible to put down.” —USA Today “There’s a level of emotional and historical sophistication within Bardugo’s original epic fantasy that sets it apart.” —Vanity Fair “Unlike anything I’ve ever read.” —Veronica Roth, bestselling author of Divergent “Bardugo crafts a first-rate adventure, a poignant romance, and an intriguing mystery!” —Rick Riordan, bestselling author of the Percy Jackson series
