Id Like To Play Alone Please

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I'd Like to Play Alone, Please

Author : Tom Segura
Publisher : Hachette UK
ISBN 13 : 1538704625
Total Pages : 205 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (387 download)

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Book Synopsis I'd Like to Play Alone, Please by : Tom Segura

Download or read book I'd Like to Play Alone, Please written by Tom Segura and published by Hachette UK. This book was released on 2022-06-14 with total page 205 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A #2 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER From a massively successful stand-up comedian and co-host of chart-topping podcasts “2 Bears 1 Cave” and “Your Mom’s House,” hilarious real-life stories of parenting, celebrity encounters, youthful mistakes, misanthropy, and so much more. Tom Segura is known for his twisted takes and irreverent comedic voice. But after a few years of crazy tours and churning out podcasts weekly, all while parenting two young children, he desperately needs a second to himself. It’s not that he hates his friends and family — he’s not a monster — he’s just beat, which is why his son’s (ruthless) first full sentence, “I’d like to play alone, please,” has since become his mantra. In this collection of stories, Tom combines his signature curmudgeonly humor with a revealing look at some of the ridiculous situations that shaped him and the ludicrous characters who always seem to seek him out. The stories feature hilarious anecdotes about Tom's time on the road, including some surreal encounters with celebrities at airports; his unfiltered South American family; the trials and tribulations of parenting young children with bizarrely morbid interests; and, perhaps most memorably, experiences with his dad who, like any good Baby Boomer father, loves to talk about his bowel movements and share graphic Vietnam stories at inappropriate moments. All of this is enough to make anyone want some peace and quiet. I’D LIKE TO PLAY ALONE, PLEASE will have readers laughing out loud and nodding in agreement with Segura's message: in a world where everyone is increasingly insane, sometimes you just need to be alone.

Life of the Party

Author : Bert Kreischer
Publisher : St. Martin's Press
ISBN 13 : 1250030315
Total Pages : 256 pages
Book Rating : 4.2/5 (5 download)

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Book Synopsis Life of the Party by : Bert Kreischer

Download or read book Life of the Party written by Bert Kreischer and published by St. Martin's Press. This book was released on 2014-05-27 with total page 256 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A collection of outrageous stories by the standup comic, TV host, and inspiration for the movie National Lampoon's Van Wilder Bert Kreischer doesn't know how to say "no." If he did, he wouldn't have gotten himself mixed up with a group of Russian mobsters on a class trip to Moscow, earning him his nickname: "The Machine." He wouldn't have wrestled with a bear or swum with sharks on national television. He wouldn't have (possibly) smoked PCP with a star of Saturday Night Live. And he wouldn't have been named the Number One Partier in the Nation by Rolling Stone, inspired the movie National Lampoon's Van Wilder, or performed standup to sellout crowds across the country. The stories Kreischer shares in Life of the Party are a guidebook on how not to grow up. From his fraternity days at Florida State University, to his rise as a standup, to his marriage and first brushes with fatherhood, Kreischer shows you a path that may not lead you to maturity or personal growth. But it will lead you to a shitload of fun.

Stay Hungry

Author : Sebastian Maniscalco
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1501115995
Total Pages : 238 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (11 download)

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Book Synopsis Stay Hungry by : Sebastian Maniscalco

Download or read book Stay Hungry written by Sebastian Maniscalco and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2018-02-27 with total page 238 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From comedian and actor Sebastian Maniscalco—star of the film About My Father with Robert DeNiro—an inspiring, honest, uproarious collection of essays tracing his career from playing boxing rings and bowling alleys to reaching the pinnacles of comedy success. At twenty-four, Sebastian Maniscalco arrived in LA with a suitcase and saved up minimum wages. He knew no one and nothing about standup comedy, but he was determined to go for it anyway. Two decades later, he’s on the Forbes’ list of highest earning comedians, selling out arenas, and starring in numerous hit comedy specials including Why Would You Do That? and Is It Me?. Stay Hungry tells the story of the twenty years in between. On the way from clueless rube to standup superstar, Seb was booed off stages; survived on tips and stolen food; got advice from mentors Andrew Dice Clay, Vince Vaughn, Tony Danza, and Jerry Seinfeld; fell in love; and stayed true to his Italian-immigrant roots. The one code that always kept him going: stay hungry, keep focused, never give up, and one day, you’ll make it.

A Place to Read

Author : Leigh Hodgkinson
Publisher : Bloomsbury Publishing USA
ISBN 13 : 168119323X
Total Pages : 36 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (811 download)

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Book Synopsis A Place to Read by : Leigh Hodgkinson

Download or read book A Place to Read written by Leigh Hodgkinson and published by Bloomsbury Publishing USA. This book was released on 2017-06-20 with total page 36 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When I want to read, what I really, really need, is a place to sit . . . just for a bit. Somewhere comfy, NOT itchy-fuzzy, somewhere quiet, NOT buzz-buzzy. The little reader in this book is having a hard time finding the ideal reading spot. Everywhere has noise, or smells, or is too hot or cold . . . and our reader finds himself with lots of company in each reading spot he considers. But soon we discover the truth about reading books: A book is best anywhere . . . a book is best when you SHARE. Join one small book lover's search for the perfect place to read in this beautifully illustrated picture book by the talented Leigh Hodgkinson.

You're Doing Great!

Author : Tom Papa
Publisher : St. Martin's Press
ISBN 13 : 1250240409
Total Pages : 327 pages
Book Rating : 4.2/5 (52 download)

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Book Synopsis You're Doing Great! by : Tom Papa

Download or read book You're Doing Great! written by Tom Papa and published by St. Martin's Press. This book was released on 2020-05-12 with total page 327 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Comedian and Live from Here head writer Tom Papa, author of Your Dad Stole My Rake, tackles the modern condition in a heartwarming group of short essays. Tom Papa is a little worried about you. You seem stressed, overworked and, frankly, a little mixed up. Everyone is fighting an overwhelming feeling that things are getting worse, that we should be doing more, that we’re not good enough. Well, life isn't perfect. There have always been problems and there always will be. You can fight for the things you believe in, you can work really, really hard, but you shouldn't lose track of the fact that while you’re doing all that, life is flying by at lightning-fast speed. If you actually take a breath and look around you’ll realize you’re actually doing great. Here’s the thing: We live in an amazing time filled with airplanes, scooters, and peanut butter cups. We have air conditioning, blenders, and martini shakers. It's time to refocus, enjoy it all, and stop waiting for something better! Relax with comedian and Live from Here writer and performer Tom Papa as he explores his favorite subjects in 75 essays, including: You Don't Have to Live Your Best Life Don't Open the Mail I'm So Baked I Love Your Love Handles Don't Go Tubing Shut Up and Eat Recalibrate, turn off your device, and open your eyes to a better reality: You’re doing great!

Sometimes I Lie

Author : Alice Feeney
Publisher : Flatiron Books
ISBN 13 : 1250144833
Total Pages : 288 pages
Book Rating : 4.2/5 (51 download)

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Book Synopsis Sometimes I Lie by : Alice Feeney

Download or read book Sometimes I Lie written by Alice Feeney and published by Flatiron Books. This book was released on 2018-03-13 with total page 288 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: My name is Amber Reynolds. There are three things you should know about me: 1. I’m in a coma. 2. My husband doesn’t love me anymore. 3. Sometimes I lie. Amber wakes up in a hospital. She can’t move. She can’t speak. She can’t open her eyes. She can hear everyone around her, but they have no idea. Amber doesn’t remember what happened, but she has a suspicion her husband had something to do with it. Alternating between her paralyzed present, the week before her accident, and a series of childhood diaries from twenty years ago, this brilliant psychological thriller asks: Is something really a lie if you believe it's the truth?

Your Dad Stole My Rake

Author : Tom Papa
Publisher : St. Martin's Press
ISBN 13 : 1250144388
Total Pages : 303 pages
Book Rating : 4.2/5 (51 download)

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Book Synopsis Your Dad Stole My Rake by : Tom Papa

Download or read book Your Dad Stole My Rake written by Tom Papa and published by St. Martin's Press. This book was released on 2018-06-05 with total page 303 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Stand-up comedian and family man Tom Papa explores how we deal with our inescapable relatives and their bizarre behavior. A warm, hilarious book that saws deep into every branch of the family tree and uncovers the most hysterical and surprisingly meaningful aspects of our lives.

Diary of an Oxygen Thief

Author : Anonymous
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1501157868
Total Pages : 192 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (11 download)

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Book Synopsis Diary of an Oxygen Thief by : Anonymous

Download or read book Diary of an Oxygen Thief written by Anonymous and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2016-05-23 with total page 192 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Hurt people hurt people. Say there was a novel in which Holden Caulfield was an alcoholic and Lolita was a photographer’s assistant and, somehow, they met in Bright Lights, Big City. He’s blinded by love. She by ambition. Diary of an Oxygen Thief is an honest, hilarious, and heartrending novel, but above all, a very realistic account of what we do to each other and what we allow to have done to us.

If He Had Been with Me

Author : Laura Nowlin
Publisher : Sourcebooks, Inc.
ISBN 13 : 1402277849
Total Pages : 336 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (22 download)

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Book Synopsis If He Had Been with Me by : Laura Nowlin

Download or read book If He Had Been with Me written by Laura Nowlin and published by Sourcebooks, Inc.. This book was released on 2013-04-02 with total page 336 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: If he had been with me everything would have been different... I wasn't with Finn on that August night. But I should've been. It was raining, of course. And he and Sylvie were arguing as he drove down the slick road. No one ever says what they were arguing about. Other people think it's not important. They do not know there is another story. The story that lurks between the facts. What they do not know—the cause of the argument—is crucial. So let me tell you...

I'd Like to Play Alone, Please

Author : Tom Segura
Publisher : Grand Central Publishing
ISBN 13 : 1538704625
Total Pages : 205 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (387 download)

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Book Synopsis I'd Like to Play Alone, Please by : Tom Segura

Download or read book I'd Like to Play Alone, Please written by Tom Segura and published by Grand Central Publishing. This book was released on 2022-06-14 with total page 205 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A #2 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER From a massively successful stand-up comedian and co-host of chart-topping podcasts “2 Bears 1 Cave” and “Your Mom’s House,” hilarious real-life stories of parenting, celebrity encounters, youthful mistakes, misanthropy, and so much more. Tom Segura is known for his twisted takes and irreverent comedic voice. But after a few years of crazy tours and churning out podcasts weekly, all while parenting two young children, he desperately needs a second to himself. It’s not that he hates his friends and family — he’s not a monster — he’s just beat, which is why his son’s (ruthless) first full sentence, “I’d like to play alone, please,” has since become his mantra. In this collection of stories, Tom combines his signature curmudgeonly humor with a revealing look at some of the ridiculous situations that shaped him and the ludicrous characters who always seem to seek him out. The stories feature hilarious anecdotes about Tom's time on the road, including some surreal encounters with celebrities at airports; his unfiltered South American family; the trials and tribulations of parenting young children with bizarrely morbid interests; and, perhaps most memorably, experiences with his dad who, like any good Baby Boomer father, loves to talk about his bowel movements and share graphic Vietnam stories at inappropriate moments. All of this is enough to make anyone want some peace and quiet. I’D LIKE TO PLAY ALONE, PLEASE will have readers laughing out loud and nodding in agreement with Segura's message: in a world where everyone is increasingly insane, sometimes you just need to be alone.

Legendborn

Author : Tracy Deonn
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 153444162X
Total Pages : 544 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (344 download)

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Book Synopsis Legendborn by : Tracy Deonn

Download or read book Legendborn written by Tracy Deonn and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2020-09-15 with total page 544 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: An Instant New York Times Bestseller! Winner of the Coretta Scott King - John Steptoe for New Talent Author Award Filled with mystery and an intriguingly rich magic system, Tracy Deonn’s YA contemporary fantasy reinvents the King Arthur legend and “braids together Southern folk traditions and Black Girl Magic into a searing modern tale of grief, power, and self-discovery” (Dhonielle Clayton, New York Times bestselling author of The Belles). After her mother dies in an accident, sixteen-year-old Bree Matthews wants nothing to do with her family memories or childhood home. A residential program for bright high schoolers at UNC–Chapel Hill seems like the perfect escape—until Bree witnesses a magical attack her very first night on campus. A flying demon feeding on human energies. A secret society of so called “Legendborn” students that hunt the creatures down. And a mysterious teenage mage who calls himself a “Merlin” and who attempts—and fails—to wipe Bree’s memory of everything she saw. The mage’s failure unlocks Bree’s own unique magic and a buried memory with a hidden connection: the night her mother died, another Merlin was at the hospital. Now that Bree knows there’s more to her mother’s death than what’s on the police report, she’ll do whatever it takes to find out the truth, even if that means infiltrating the Legendborn as one of their initiates. She recruits Nick, a self-exiled Legendborn with his own grudge against the group, and their reluctant partnership pulls them deeper into the society’s secrets—and closer to each other. But when the Legendborn reveal themselves as the descendants of King Arthur’s knights and explain that a magical war is coming, Bree has to decide how far she’ll go for the truth and whether she should use her magic to take the society down—or join the fight.

Sicker in the Head

Author : Judd Apatow
Publisher : Random House Trade Paperbacks
ISBN 13 : 0525509429
Total Pages : 545 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (255 download)

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Book Synopsis Sicker in the Head by : Judd Apatow

Download or read book Sicker in the Head written by Judd Apatow and published by Random House Trade Paperbacks. This book was released on 2023-04-18 with total page 545 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • An all-new collection of honest, hilarious, and enlightening conversations with some of the most exciting names in comedy—from lifelong comedy nerd Judd Apatow. “When I need to read an interview with a comedian while in the bathroom, I always turn to Judd Apatow for deeply personal insights into the comedic mind. Place one on your toilet today.”—Amy Schumer ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR: Vulture No one knows comedy like Judd Apatow. From interviewing the biggest comics of the day for his high school radio show to performing stand-up in L.A. dive bars with his roommate Adam Sandler, to writing and directing Knocked Up and producing Freaks and Geeks, Apatow has always lived, breathed, and dreamed comedy. In this all-new collection of interviews, the follow-up to the New York Times bestselling Sick in the Head, Apatow sits down with comedy legends such as David Letterman, Whoopi Goldberg, and Will Ferrell, as well as the writers and performers who are pushing comedy to the limits, and defining a new era of laughter: John Mulaney, Hannah Gadsby, Bowen Yang, Amber Ruffin, Pete Davidson, and others. In intimate and hilariously honest conversations, they discuss what got them into comedy, and what—despite personal and national traumas—keeps them going. Together, they talk about staying up too late to watch late-night comedy, what kind of nerds they were high school, and the right amount of delusional self-confidence one needs to “make it” in the industry. Like eavesdropping on lifelong friends, these pages expose the existential questions that plague even the funniest and most talented among us: Why make people laugh while the world is in crisis? What ugly, uncomfortable truths about our society—and ourselves—can comedy reveal? Along the way, these comics reminisce about those who helped them on their journey—from early success through failure and rejection, and back again—even as they look ahead to the future of comedy and Hollywood in a hyper-connected, overstimulated world. With his trademark insight, curiosity, and irrepressible sense of humor, Apatow explores the nature of creativity, professional ambition, and vulnerability in an ever-evolving cultural landscape, and how our favorite comics are able to keep us laughing along the way.

I'm Fine...And Other Lies

Author : Whitney Cummings
Publisher : Penguin
ISBN 13 : 0735212619
Total Pages : 290 pages
Book Rating : 4.7/5 (352 download)

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Book Synopsis I'm Fine...And Other Lies by : Whitney Cummings

Download or read book I'm Fine...And Other Lies written by Whitney Cummings and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2021-02-02 with total page 290 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “Whitney Cummings has written a book about being, well, not fine—and what to do when you find yourself with brutal anxiety and a co-dependency disorder; all in her trademark wit, humor, and honesty. This book, however, is fine as hell.”—Sophia Amoruso, author of #Girlboss “The funniest cry for help you'll read this year.”—BJ Novak Well, well, well. Look at you, ogling my book page....I presume if you’re reading this it means you either need more encouragement to buy it or we used to date and you’re trying to figure out if you should sue me or not. Here are all the stories and mistakes I’ve made that were way too embarrassing to tell on stage in front of an actual audience; but thanks to not-so-modern technology, you can read about them here so I don’t have to risk having your judgmental eye contact crush my self-esteem. This book contains some delicious schadenfreude in which I recall such humiliating debacles as breaking my shoulder while trying to impress a guy, coming very close to spending my life in a Guatemalan prison, and having my lacerated ear sewn back on by a deaf guy after losing it in a torrid love affair. In addition to hoarding mortifying situations that’ll make you feel way better about your choices, I’ve also accumulated a lot of knowledge from therapists, psychotherapists, and psychopaths, which can probably help you avoid making the same mistakes I’ve made. Think of this book as everything you’d want from the Internet all in one place, except without the constant distractions of ads, online shopping, and porn. I’m not sure what else to say to say, except that you should buy it if you want to laugh and learn how to stop being crazy. And if we used to date, see you in court.

This Will Be Funny Later

Author : Jenny Pentland
Publisher : HarperCollins
ISBN 13 : 0062962957
Total Pages : 402 pages
Book Rating : 4.0/5 (629 download)

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Book Synopsis This Will Be Funny Later by : Jenny Pentland

Download or read book This Will Be Funny Later written by Jenny Pentland and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2022-01-18 with total page 402 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A funny, biting, and entertaining memoir of coming of age in the shadow of celebrity and finding your own way in the face of absolute chaos that is both a moving portrait of a complicated family and an exploration of the cost of fame. Growing up, Jenny Pentland’s life was a literal sitcom. Many of the storylines for her mother’s smash hit series, Roseanne, were drawn from Pentland’s early family life in working-class Denver. But that was only the beginning of the drama. Roseanne Barr’s success as a comedian catapulted the family from the Rockies to star-studded Hollywood—with its toxic culture of money, celebrity, and prying tabloids that was destabilizing for a child in grade school. By adolescence, Jenny struggled with anxiety and eating issues. Her parents and new stepfather, struggling to help, responded by sending Jenny and her siblings on a grand tour of the self-help movement of the ’80s—from fat camps to brat camps, wilderness survival programs to drug rehab clinics (even though Jenny didn’t take drugs). Becoming an adult, all Jenny wanted was to get married and have kids, despite Roseanne’s admonishments not to limit herself to being just a wife and mother. In this scathingly funny and moving memoir, Pentland reveals what it’s like to grow up as the daughter of a television star and how she navigated the turmoil, eventually finding her own path. Now happily married and raising five sons on a farm, Pentland has worked tirelessly to create the stable family she never had, while coming to terms at last with her deep-seated anxiety. This Will Be Funny Later is a darkly funny and frank chronicle of transition, from childhood to adulthood and motherhood—one woman’s journey to define herself and create the life she always wanted.

Everyone, Just Like Me

Author : Carylee Carrington
Publisher :
ISBN 13 : 9781480863620
Total Pages : 24 pages
Book Rating : 4.8/5 (636 download)

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Book Synopsis Everyone, Just Like Me by : Carylee Carrington

Download or read book Everyone, Just Like Me written by Carylee Carrington and published by . This book was released on 2018-07-05 with total page 24 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Joshua feels sad. He must wear glasses, and he feels different than the other kids. Hes the only one in his class with glasses. He thinks everyone will laugh at him. That night, Joshua finds a bright star and offers his wish. He wishes that everyone would be just like him. But when he gets to school the next day, things get a little crazy. He discovers there may be a problem with his request. A picture book for children, Everyone, Just Like Me, encourages kids to embrace their uniqueness. Through Joshuas special wish, it shows that individual differences are what make each person special.

Where the Crawdads Sing (Movie Tie-In)

Author : Delia Owens
Publisher : Penguin
ISBN 13 : 0593540484
Total Pages : 401 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (935 download)

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Book Synopsis Where the Crawdads Sing (Movie Tie-In) by : Delia Owens

Download or read book Where the Crawdads Sing (Movie Tie-In) written by Delia Owens and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2022-06-28 with total page 401 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: NOW A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE The #1 New York Times bestselling worldwide sensation with more than 15 million copies sold, “a painfully beautiful first novel that is at once a murder mystery, a coming-of-age narrative and a celebration of nature” (The New York Times Book Review). For years, rumors of the “Marsh Girl” have haunted Barkley Cove, a quiet town on the North Carolina coast. So in late 1969, when handsome Chase Andrews is found dead, the locals immediately suspect Kya Clark, the so-called Marsh Girl. But Kya is not what they say. Sensitive and intelligent, she has survived for years alone in the marsh that she calls home, finding friends in the gulls and lessons in the sand. Then the time comes when she yearns to be touched and loved. When two young men from town become intrigued by her wild beauty, Kya opens herself to a new life—until the unthinkable happens. Where the Crawdads Sing is at once an exquisite ode to the natural world, a heartbreaking coming-of-age story, and a surprising tale of possible murder. Delia Owens reminds us that we are forever shaped by the children we once were, and that we are all subject to the beautiful and violent secrets that nature keeps.

Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell

Author : Susanna Clarke
Publisher : Bloomsbury Publishing USA
ISBN 13 : 160819535X
Total Pages : 1098 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (81 download)

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Book Synopsis Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell by : Susanna Clarke

Download or read book Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell written by Susanna Clarke and published by Bloomsbury Publishing USA. This book was released on 2010-06-05 with total page 1098 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In the Hugo-award winning, epic New York Times Bestseller and basis for the BBC miniseries, two men change England's history when they bring magic back into the world. In the midst of the Napoleonic Wars in 1806, most people believe magic to have long since disappeared from England - until the reclusive Mr. Norrell reveals his powers and becomes an overnight celebrity. Another practicing magician then emerges: the young and daring Jonathan Strange. He becomes Norrell's pupil, and the two join forces in the war against France. But Strange is increasingly drawn to the wild, most perilous forms of magic, and he soon risks sacrificing his partnership with Norrell and everything else he holds dear. Susanna Clarke's brilliant first novel is an utterly compelling epic tale of nineteenth-century England and the two magicians who, first as teacher and pupil and then as rivals, emerge to change its history.