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Case Of The Cantankerous Carcass
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Book Synopsis The Case of The Cantankerous Carcass by : Howard of Warwick
Download or read book The Case of The Cantankerous Carcass written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2017-08-24 with total page 270 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: How is a medieval monk supposed to investigate a death if the corpse keeps complaining all the time? Once more Brother Hermitage toils to avoid his duties as King's Investigator, and fails miserably. But this time it's personal. When his beloved old Abbot arrives at Wat the Weaver's workshop asking for his aid, Hermitage cannot refuse. He only has one beloved old Abbot, after all. But this one comes with a web made by specially tangled spiders. There are Normans involved of course, so far so normal. Add a monastery that no monk of sense would go anywhere near and a village of pagans whose answer to every problem is to set light to it and Brother Hermitage is out of his depth almost immediately. Wat and Cwen the weavers bring some common sense to the situation, but there isn't much of that to begin with. It's medieval crime with all of the normal human failings - and a few new ones as well. People laugh out loud at Howard of Warwick. 5* "I laughed out loud." "Hilarious and very funny." "This series just gets better and better."
Book Synopsis The Case of The Curious Corpse by : Howard of Warwick
Download or read book The Case of The Curious Corpse written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2017-05-24 with total page 288 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: More medieval crime comedy; the genre that hides in the bushes and makes strange noises. Brother Hermitage is compelled to yet another investigation by the sight of a most curious corpse. Helpful compulsion also comes in the shape of a dozen well-armed Norman soldiers and the King’s man Le Pedvin, who will probably stab him if he doesn’t get on with it. Clearly this a Very Important Victim. Suspicions are raised by a host of fascinating characters, including Hereward the Wake, all of whom claim to have loved the victim dearly, but who all benefit from the death in one way or another. It’s also a bit odd that King William insists that he is not to blame, despite boasting about being the killer of an awful lot of other people. On top of all that there is even a rival for the role of Investigator. As Hermitage doesn’t want to be an investigator that’s good, isn’t it? Ploughing in with Wat and Cwen at his back, side and sometimes in front, Brother Hermitage relies on his well established methodology (hoping something occurs to him at the last minute). With all that's going on around this particular death, that might not be enough... The mysteries of Brother Hermitage have been variously described as “hilarious”, “laugh out loud funny”, “side-splitting”, and “stupid” - which is a bit of mystery in its own right. Go on, give it a try…
Book Synopsis The Case of The Clerical Cadaver by : Howard of Warwick
Download or read book The Case of The Clerical Cadaver written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2016-10-27 with total page 268 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: It’s new, it's medieval and it’s all very silly…. A hidden monastery in the depths of England’s depths? A secret that could rock the church to its core? A trail of clues that can only be interpreted by an expert? This all sounds rather familiar…. Except the expert is Brother Hermitage, so I wouldn’t get your hopes up. Called once more by King William - who doesn’t even know what he’s calling for - Hermitage, Cwen and Wat the weaver set off to deal with the greatest mystery of all. A mystery that has been protected and guarded for years by a secret brotherhood sworn by awful oaths. A mystery only known to a priest who now happens to be dead. A mystery hidden in a monastery that isn’t even supposed to exist. A mystery of such value that the unscrupulous and greedy are also after it, and these particular unscrupulous and greedy know Brother Hermitage very well indeed. Will all be revealed in a satisfactory manner? Will the convoluted trail lead to a revelation of staggering significance? Hardly. This is a Chronicle of Brother Hermitage, after all…. CAUTION: Not for the historically humourless. Howard of Warwick has previous form... “Absolutely hilarious” 5* “I laughed, I had tears running down my face” 5* “Stupid” 1* Need I say more... you have been warned.
Book Synopsis The Investigator's Kingdom by : Howard of Warwick
Download or read book The Investigator's Kingdom written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2022-08-24 with total page 247 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The world’s best-selling medieval crime comedies - and the most persistent. Howard of Warwick produces yet more nonsense mystery from days gone by. Just not gone by quite far enough. The Normans are coming, the Normans are coming. And they’re looking for Brother Hermitage. This cannot go well. It’s never gone well in the past so why should this time be any different? King William’s own messenger has come all the way from London looking for Brother Hermitage, the investigator. It can only mean one thing; a really important murder. Running away or hiding are obviously options, but the king’s messengers don't take “not available” for an answer. Hermitage hears the message and asks for it to be repeated, but still doesn't understand. He is easily confused but seldom so quickly. At least he has company. Wat the Weaver and Cwen are just as lost this time. Bart, the would-be investigator’s apprentice, is the only one who sees this very strange situation as an opportunity. And that’s a worry in its own right. Forced to travel to the far north, some fifteen miles away, Hermitage and the others make some alarming discoveries that go so far back in history, even Hermitage didn't see them coming. Still, meeting new people and hearing about their ways broadens the mind. Or threatens the life, one or the other. As usual, death is always close at hand, and it keeps looking at Brother Hermitage in a funny way. Then one character turns out to have a secret no one would have guessed. Not even if the threat of death made you guess really hard. “Very good indeed, brilliant” BBC 5* How on earth do you keep writing hilarious medieval murder mysteries? Ask Howard of Warwick’ 5* Always a Delight 5* Marvellous, laughed all the way through 5* This sorry world is in dire need of Brother Hermitage.
Book Synopsis The Hermes Parchment by : Howard of Warwick
Download or read book The Hermes Parchment written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2019-06-24 with total page 278 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Where goes the King’s Investigator, there goes death; by murder, usually. The author of the Best Selling The Heretics of De'Ath and other tales too numerous to be polite, does not know when to stop. Despite his protestations that disaster is inevitable, Brother Hermitage travels to Lincoln to sort out a library. It’s the task of his dreams, even if he’s reasonably confident that someone will get murdered in the process. And there are several candidates. One of those troublesome Norman soldiers in the tavern? The king’s tenant-in-chief, Lord Colesvain, who has just forced the whole town to build his house for him? Colesvain’s objectionable son, Picot, who has a rather unhealthy interest in “illustrated” literature? But a library should be safe enough; apart from the librarian obsessed with books on sorcery and magic, obviously. Delving in the bottom of a box of books delivered from a long-lost monastery, Hermitage discovers the great Hermes Parchment and the whole world goes mad. Hermitage, Wat and Cwen become embroiled in events that were pretty embroiled to begin with.There are wise men of the woods who turn out to be no such thing, and suggestions of an evil secret hidden in the parchment’s pages just waiting to be released. And a dead body turns up. Just as Hermitage said it would. Told you so. It’s yet another outing for the world’s most medieval detective. "very good indeed, brilliant," BBC Coventry and Warwick 5* Hilarious 5* Like Pratchett does 1066 5* Laugh out loud with a good mystery. 1* Stupid
Book Synopsis CASE OF THE CANTANKEROUS CARCASS. by : HOWARD. OF WARWICK
Download or read book CASE OF THE CANTANKEROUS CARCASS. written by HOWARD. OF WARWICK and published by . This book was released on 2021 with total page pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Book Synopsis The Investigator's Wedding by : Howard of Warwick
Download or read book The Investigator's Wedding written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2022-05-24 with total page 265 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Howard of Warwick Goes Again. From the No 1 best selling author of innumerable medieval murders comes… a wedding. Unfortunately, some weddings can also be murder. Wat and Cwen, both weavers of tapestry for the very strong of heart are to marry. Brother Hermitage, the King’s Investigator will be chief witness and so warnings are issued; there is to be no suspicious death ruining the big day. But no one told the Normans. Lord Walter d’Aincourt has been given Derby by King William and he is going to take it, wedding or not. In fact, he’ll help himself to anything else that takes his eye - or send some large Normans on horses to take it for him. If the wedding doesn’t go quite as planned, things aren’t much better in the Norman camp. One soldier ends up with a tent pole where there shouldn’t be one, and it’s business as usual for Brother Hermitage. He should be used to being accused of murder by now. However, there’s enough conflict between the Normans themselves for several decent suspects. All this situation needs is a reasoned approach, careful analysis, a well-constructed argument and some sensible discussion. Or a great big fight. And that’s how wedding receptions were invented. “very good indeed, brilliant” BBC 5* A funny happy series of books that cheer you up. 5* Outright laughter 5* Just as good as every other in the series 5* Laughed till my sides ached
Book Synopsis The Heretics of De'Ath by : Howard of Warwick
Download or read book The Heretics of De'Ath written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2010-12-12 with total page 253 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Medieval mystery for people who laugh starts here.... England's most famous date 1066: At the monastery of De'Ath's Dingle, during a completely pointless theological debate, there is a mysterious death. Routine business for the average investigative medieval monk. Unfortunately, this isn’t a tale of average monks. Anyone who would put the idiot Brother Simon in charge of a murder investigation is either one chant short of a plainsong or is up to something. When Brother Hermitage, innocent in every way, including bystanding, is lined up for execution, he begins to wonder if something might be going on. Perhaps his new companion Wat, weaver of pornographic tapestry, can figure out what it is. Before it's too late. If you are a lover of the historical detective genre, if you have a deep respect for the worlds created, don’t read this book. It’ll only upset you. Now available in a massive box set with The Garderobe of Death and The Tapestry of Death; for those with a lever-arch Kindle. People have commented on the whole sorry business: 5* Such a good writer, it's a whole new slant on medieval mystery. The truth is out there, sort of! Always makes me laugh, love these books, love this author. More please as soon as possible, just keep writing... 5* Like Cadfael meets Clouseau. 5* The usual mayhem, confusion, murder and laughs! 5* Always makes me laugh, love these books, love this author. 1* Stupid! Be warned, there are now 31 Chronicles of Brother Hermitage
Book Synopsis The Investigator's Apprentice by : Howard of Warwick
Download or read book The Investigator's Apprentice written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2022-02-24 with total page 257 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Howard of Warwick; the best-seller with sole responsibility for the medieval crime comedy genre. “Like Cadfael meets Clouseau” "very good indeed, brilliant," BBC Now contains added history. Brother Hermitage does worry. Even when there hasn’t been a murder, he worries that there probably has. It can’t do any harm to check, surely? Well, of course, it can. Has the King’s Investigator learned nothing from his previous 23 chronicles? No, of course he hasn’t. When word of death is brought from Derby, Hermitage is concerned this may be more than the usual weekly toll. A simple check should suffice, while a more complex and thorough one would be more satisfying. And this turns up quite a list. The Alodie family, who supposedly succumbed to plague; Maynard the Mighty who sweated to death and old Athlot; a ninety-year-old who fell off his roof. Hm, which one sounds a bit odd? And every good tale deserves a meanwhile… Meanwhile, off in the eastern marshes, a lone escapee from the Norman terror seeks Brother Hermitage with murder in mind. But the journey to Derby will be troublesome, including having to travel with a small band of Norman soldiers. But remember, in 1066 not all Normans took those first boats to Hastings. Some stayed behind to guard the territory. Others ensured that the land continued to flourish. Still more were too old or infirm to partake in the great adventure; And then one or two were simply best kept away from anything sharp. And everything is converging on the King’s Investigator. 5* If you've not read any of them then do yourself a favour and start right away… 5* This series, and Howard of Warwick’s books about what ‘really’ happened at Hastings in 1066, are hilarious 5* Such a good writer, it's a whole new slant on medieval mystery. The truth is out there, sort of! 5* History at its most hilarious
Book Synopsis A Murder for Mistress Cwen by : Howard of Warwick
Download or read book A Murder for Mistress Cwen written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2017-10-24 with total page 224 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: For a medieval monk who hates investigating anything, Brother Hermitage seems to do it quite a lot. As he stumbles into his 10th full length tale, signs of improvement remain stubbornly invisible. When Stigand of Arundel arrives in Derby with a commission from King William to buy some very expensive hawks, Wat, Weaver of adult tapestry sees an opportunity for profit. Brother Hermitage sees only trouble. We then discover that Cwen, fine young tapestrier with a good eye for colour, nimble fingers and a frightening temper, also has some very peculiar relatives. So peculiar that they warrant investigation in their own right. Once more there is murder and of course there are Normans and Vikings and Saxons. If any of them actually has a clue what's going on they're not saying anything. In his previous debacles Brother Hermitage relied on Wat and Cwen for guidance, support and frequent reminders to use some common sense. This time they’re all up to their eyes in it but surely things can’t go any worse? Medieval Crime Comedy is not going away and Howard of Warwick doesn’t know any better… 5* “Hilarious” 5* “Laugh out loud funny” 5* “Great fun”
Book Synopsis The King's Investigator by : Howard of Warwick
Download or read book The King's Investigator written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2020-06-24 with total page 285 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Death in the Tower of London? This could give the place a bad reputation. In King William’s new London fortress (so new it doesn’t have a tower yet), a dead body lies right outside his chamber door. This could be murder as the victim is the widely hated Malf; so widely hated, virtually everyone is suspect. Brother Hermitage, the King’s Investigator must be summoned; the King’s investigator who really doesn’t want to do the job at all anymore. Fortunately, someone else seems very keen to take over: If you thought Brother Hermitage didn’t know what he was doing, Brother Peter is going to be a revelation. But murder seems to be a routine feature of court intrigue: Could it be a result of the dispute between the ghastly Le Pedvin, William’s favourite killer, and Ranulph de Sauveloy, his favourite administrator? Could it be Malf’s own family, who really can’t wait for him to die until they inherit? Could it be the Saxon rebels who are hiding in a very peculiar place close at hand? Brother Hermitage, Wat the Weaver and Cwen have got to find out and as usual, it all goes wrong almost immediately. Find the killer or face the same fate themselves is a familiar old refrain. But perhaps this time, Hermitage sees a way out. Could he really hand his hated job on to someone else; someone who really wants to do it? Populated by old familiar faces from most of Hermitage’s nightmares, The King’s Investigator could be the very end…. ... Although now we learn there's a Part II - how did that happen? - Look for the imaginatively titled, The King's Investigator Part II Howard of Warwick’s mission to bring medieval crime comedy to people who didn’t know they wanted it, takes its nineteenth step. Numerous No 1 Best Sellers, over 100,000 copies out there somewhere and containing more nonsense than a monk’s margin, it looks like it’s here to stay - or is it? Previous volumes have garnered praise: 5* Another brilliant read 5* Another fun filled adventure 5* Ha, ha, ha! Aha! Brother Hermitage does it again. 5* Masterpiece from Howard 1* Silly. "very good indeed, brilliant," BBC Coventry and Warwick
Book Synopsis No Murder Here by : Howard of Warwick
Download or read book No Murder Here written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2024-02-29 with total page 278 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: 5* Absolutely brilliant, as always. 5* So well written, so entertaining and amusing. 5* A great read from start to finish There is no murder here. And even if there was, under no circumstances is Brother Hermitage, King William’s investigator, to be allowed anywhere near it. This is a very sensitive matter for the Duke of Normandy, now King of England, and he wants it dealt with properly. He doesn’t want a band of Saxon idiots trampling all over the place, offending everyone. But, in a far-off outpost of the duchy, an ancient ritual has been enacted, which immediately went horribly wrong. Someone must be sent to find out what happened and who is behind it. Negotiating the way through scheming and feuding locals will demand sensitivity. Untangling superstition from fact will require careful analysis. Appreciating custom and practice will need a sympathetic ear. And you’ll need to speak the right language, obviously. So, this is really not a job for Brother Hermitage. It’s probably even more inappropriate for the weavers, Wat and Cwen - the woman who stares at people and the man who made those disgusting pictures. Keep them away. However, the more explicit the instruction, the greater the chance of mistake… In any case, there is no murder here. Oh, really?
Book Synopsis Not Another Murder by : Howard of Warwick
Download or read book Not Another Murder written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2024-06-24 with total page 243 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Not Another Murder. A question? A statement? Or the despairing sigh of a monk convinced that Death's scythe must have caught in his habit? Escape from Gernesey and a return to Derby is on everyone's mind, but events have spotted Brother Hermitage, and they're up to their usual tricks. This time, they've put him in a priory. What could be better? And what could possibly go wrong? The cloistered life has called him back and so all will be well. There will be no murder here, even though he's the King's Investigator. No one will die, ignoring the deaths that seem to follow him around. And anyway, this is only temporary. There won't be time for anything untoward to happen. Brother Hermitage hasn't been reading his own chronicles, has he? While Wat and Cwen try to make the best of things and work out who to bribe to get out of this place, Hermitage doesn't even make it through the first night before the body turns up. How it was done is a complete mystery, never mind why. And there is certainly something odd about this priory and its monks, who don't seem at all concerned that one of them is now dead. But a route off the island quickly opens up before them, and so there might not be time to solve some murder. With any luck, they'll be miles away before long. All they need is some money; considerably more money than they currently have. That priory seemed to have a lot of treasure... Embark on Chronicle number thirty-two, and your mind will be filled with wonder. (Wondering why, mainly.)
Book Synopsis The King's Investigator Part II by : Howard of Warwick
Download or read book The King's Investigator Part II written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2020-11-24 with total page 252 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Medieval Crime Comedy is not supposed to be a thing, yet here is book No 20. 100,000 sales and 1000 reviews including things like 5* "hilarious and fun". And now there's more investigation for Brother Hermitage just when you thought he’d given up that sort of thing. The King's Investigator Part II, surprisingly following on from Part I, finds that things have not improved. But this time it’s a missing person and there isn’t a murder at all; well, perhaps just a little one. And this is a Very Important Missing Person who needs urgent investigation, whether Hermitage likes it or not. Following a completely blatant trail that even Hermitage can track, he has to call upon the help of people he'd really rather not call upon at all. He has to go to places he'd rather not go and face consequences better not faced. A chase upriver means a boat - and we all know who that means. And worst of all, there’s the suggestion that someone might be after Wat’s money! Of course, the Normans are making things as difficult as ever but now he has people harassing him from all sides. There are more forces at play than seems decent for one investigation. And who’s this hiding in the woods? Surely not…. Read Part II and rest assured that there is no Part III. People have talked about the King’s Investigator before they even knew it was only Part I. 5* Side-splitting, laugh a minute addition to the series. 5* Please, Howard of Warwick, give us more 5* Wonderful, laughing aloud as I was reading this. 5* Another masterpiece from the quill of Howard of Warwick, gut-bustingly funny from start to finish 5* Another winner from our master of comedic medieval murder mysteries! Unlike most, we also report the lowest rating! 3* I would like a longer story and it felt like this was the end of the series, which made me sad.
Book Synopsis The 1066 From Normandy by : Howard of Warwick
Download or read book The 1066 From Normandy written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2019-09-24 with total page 221 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Death and taxes... with extra death. Yet more medieval detective-sort-of-thing from the best selling author... Brother Hermitage, the King’s most medieval investigator, is about to discover the true meaning of the Norman Conquest; money. It’s all very well Saxons fighting William on the battlefield and trying to kill him, but evading his taxes is simply beyond the pale. Something must be done about it. And who better to do something about things than his own investigator? The first problem is that the King’s Investigator doesn’t understand what it is. But then not understanding things has never held him back in the past. If tax evasion is a bad thing - which William assures him it is - then the people who do it are positively revolting. Hermitage has dealt with deceit, dishonesty and deception in the past, but he’s never met people who have made it their life’s work. Needless to say, Wat and Cwen the weavers are dragged into this, quite literally, and Wat seems to know rather too much about dodging tax. And then, of course, the bodies start piling up. Death and taxes, eh? Who’d have thought… Brother Hermitage’s 16th adventure, and Howard of Warwick’s 21st attempt at synchronised scribbling simply reveals more of the same: 5* “Hurrahs for the ole goofy gang! Another terrifically funny adventure” 5* “Hilarious” 5* “More hilarity” "very good indeed, brilliant," BBC Coventry and Warwick
Book Synopsis The Chester Chasuble by : Howard of Warwick
Download or read book The Chester Chasuble written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2019-04-24 with total page 277 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: History, hilarity and some horrible goings on. Howard of Warwick, the No 1 Best Selling author who brought you The Bayeux Embroidery, has fabricated yet another outing for the world's most medieval detective. At the request of some rather peculiar monks, Brother Hermitage and his companions, Wat and Cwen the weavers, travel to Chester to try and work out who has suffocated a priest with his own chasuble. They've even been recommended for this job by some very important people, but of course it starts to go wrong even before they arrive. Chester appears to be full of some very strange people and some even stranger religious institutions, all of whom detest one another with fervour. There are Saxon Nobles who have run away from the Normans and townsfolk for whom corruption is what they do best. Brother Hermitage must find out if the man who got killed is all he seems to be. Then there's a number of reasons why he could have been killed. And the list of who could have done it is a bit too long, even for Hermitage, who likes a list. Why does Brother Merle seem so keen on dead people? Who is the mysterious monk in the tower? How many Saxons does it take to change a kingdom? Be warned, Howard of Warwick has history: "very good indeed, brilliant," BBC Coventry and Warwick "5* Hilarious" "5* Laugh out loud" "5* Like Pratchett does 1066
Book Synopsis The 1066 To Hastings by : Howard of Warwick
Download or read book The 1066 To Hastings written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2020-01-27 with total page 245 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: 1066; coming to the seaside near you; whether you like it or not… It’s more hilarity and death from Howard of Warwick, the best selling author who doesn’t know the meaning of “enough is enough”. If ever there was a bad time to be an Anglo Saxon noble in England it was October 14th 1066. Avoiding the Hastings area was also advisable. When Saxon noble Lady Gudmund demands that the murder of her husband be investigated, Brother Hermitage feels obliged to help. When she reports that he headed south with King Harold and hasn’t come back, he thinks this might not take long. But life is never simple for the King’s Investigator, and neither is death. Uncovering things that people have gone to a lot of trouble to cover up in the first place, Brother Hermitage, Wat the Weaver and Cwen embark on an exploration of some of the more deplorable aspects of human nature; along with several pretty deplorable humans. From workshop to manorial hall they chase the most blatantly obvious murder they have ever had to deal with. And if that’s the case, why does it all start going wrong so quickly? It’s a strange murder when the investigator knows perfectly well who did it, but no one will believe him… It’s yet more medieval mystery of-a-sort, and people have spread the word; 5* Hilarious 5* Laugh out loud 1* Stupid
