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Bottling Farts Epub
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Book Synopsis Bottling Farts (EPUB) by : Donald Rump
Download or read book Bottling Farts (EPUB) written by Donald Rump and published by Donald Rump. This book was released on 2013-08-24 with total page 30 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Could the greatest power… The path to riches beyond our wildest imagination… The key to reaching the highest level of spiritual awareness and happiness… …be obtained by bottling farts??? "Shh…it's our secret…" Vlad told the little boy. "Use the power wisely…" Approximately 2,200 words.
Book Synopsis 20 Common Questions About Farts (EPUB) by : Donald Rump
Download or read book 20 Common Questions About Farts (EPUB) written by Donald Rump and published by Donald Rump. This book was released on 2013-12-13 with total page 60 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Think you know everything there is to know about mankind's favorite green gas? Well, Donald Rump has something in store for you! Inside, you'll finally get to the bottom of many age-old questions, including: - Where do farts come from? - Are farts people? - Do farts die? - Do all farts go to heaven? - What should I do if a zombie farts on me? - Does inhaling farts cause brain damage? - What if someone steals my farts? - Can farts be used to power my car? - I've run out of farts. Should I dial 911? - Should I join Fartaholics Anonymous? And many, many more! So what are you waiting for? Become a fart expert today! Approximately 11,500 words in all. Intended for readers 15 and up.
Book Synopsis Keeping Wind Laten and the Fate of the World at Bay (ePub) by : Donald Rump
Download or read book Keeping Wind Laten and the Fate of the World at Bay (ePub) written by Donald Rump and published by Donald Rump. This book was released on 2016-07-02 with total page 25 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Great heavens, the armored kingdoms are under attack! And King Krakken, the domain’s irritable ruler, has an impossible decision. Should he scramble the air ships and meet the encroaching enemy head on or listen to his counsel and hold firm? Either way, the green death is upon him and it’s only a matter of time before he comes face-to-face with the infamous Wind Laten. Approximately 1,600 words. DIAGNOSIS: Less filling. Doesn’t contain many actual farts.
Book Synopsis Gastrointestinal Blues (EPUB) by : Donald Rump
Download or read book Gastrointestinal Blues (EPUB) written by Donald Rump and published by Donald Rump. This book was released on 2013-11-24 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Since leaving his posh position at the Department of Motor Vehicles, Mackelroy Puggsley thought he\'d smelled the last psychotic fart that nearly killed him. But in his new role as a psychologist, he quickly realizes that the problem is more widespread than he thought. Will a crazed client and his two gassy brides prevent the old man from getting one last piece of nookie before he dies? Or will Mackelroy talk his way out of another hazardous situation and live to see another hair pie? For mature (and not so mature) audiences. Approximately 3,400 words in all.
Book Synopsis The Chapped-Ass Critic (EPUB) by : Donald Rump
Download or read book The Chapped-Ass Critic (EPUB) written by Donald Rump and published by Donald Rump. This book was released on 2013-08-24 with total page 26 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Zack Pimpton's ass never felt worse, and it doesn't help that his doctor is a part time comedian. Unfortunately, Zack is quite the bastard himself and accidentally says the wrong thing that causes the good, old doctor to snap. Intended for mature (and not so mature) audiences. Approximately 2,300 words. EXCERPT FROM THE CHAPPED-ASS CRITIC “Doc, you’ve got to help me,” a thin, wiry man named Zack Pimpton bent over the padded table and rubbed his behind. “My ass hurts really, really bad. I think I might have broken it.” A bead of sweat trickled down his forehead. “How did this happen?” Dr. Marsh asked. “I don't know. I was typing up a review when suddenly my butt began to hurt. At first it stung just a little. I tried ignoring it, but it got worse and worse until I eventually found myself here. It's terrible! I can’t believe I was able to drive over here.” He tried sitting and recoiled immediately. “Well, you're in luck! It's nothing life-threatening, that’s for sure, but I'm afraid you won’t have use of your buttocks again,” the portly doctor cracked a smile.
Download or read book The Ugly Truth written by Jeff Kinney and published by Penguin Books Limited. This book was released on 2012 with total page 217 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Ugly Truth is the massively funny fifth title in the highly-illustrated, bestselling and award-winning Diary of a Wimpy Kid series by Jeff Kinney. Perfect for both boys and girls of 8+, reluctant readers and all the millions of devoted Wimpy Kid fans out there. You can also discover Greg on the big screen in any one of the three Wimpy Kid Movie box office smashes.The massively funny fifth book in the bestselling and award-winning Diary of a Wimpy Kid series.Greg Heffley has always been in a hurry to grow up. But is getting older really all it's cracked up to be?Suddenly Greg is dealing with the pressures of boy-girl parties, increased responsibilities, and even the awkward changes that come with getting older. And after a fight with his best friend Rowley, it looks like Greg is going to have to face the "ugly truth" all by himself . . .Praise for Jeff Kinney and the Diary of a Wimpy Kid series:'The world has gone crazy for Jeff Kinney's Diary of a Wimpy Kid series' - Sun'Kinney is right up there with J K Rowling as one of the bestselling children's authors on the planet' - Independent'Hilarious!' - Sunday Telegraph'The most hotly anticipated children's book of the year is here - Diary of a Wimpy Kid' - The Big IssueAs well as being an international bestselling author, Jeff Kinney is also an online developer and designer. He is the creator of the children's virtual world, poptropica where you can also find the Wimpy Kid boardwalk. He was named one of Time magazine's 100 Most Influential People in 2009. He lives with his family in Massachusetts, USA. www.wimpykidclub.co.uk
Download or read book Flipped written by Wendelin Van Draanen and published by Ember. This book was released on 2003-05-13 with total page 259 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A classic he-said-she-said romantic comedy! This updated anniversary edition offers story-behind-the-story revelations from author Wendelin Van Draanen. The first time she saw him, she flipped. The first time he saw her, he ran. That was the second grade, but not much has changed by the seventh. Juli says: “My Bryce. Still walking around with my first kiss.” He says: “It’s been six years of strategic avoidance and social discomfort.” But in the eighth grade everything gets turned upside down: just as Bryce is thinking that there’s maybe more to Juli than meets the eye, she’s thinking that he’s not quite all he seemed. This is a classic romantic comedy of errors told in alternating chapters by two fresh, funny voices. The updated anniversary edition contains 32 pages of extra backmatter: essays from Wendelin Van Draanen on her sources of inspiration, on the making of the movie of Flipped, on why she’ll never write a sequel, and a selection of the amazing fan mail she’s received. Awards and accolades for Flipped: SLJ Top 100 Children’s Novels of all time IRA-CBC Children’s Choice IRA Teacher’s Choice Honor winner, Judy Lopez Memorial Award/WNBA Winner of the California Young Reader Medal “We flipped over this fantastic book, its gutsy girl Juli and its wise, wonderful ending.” — The Chicago Tribune “Van Draanen has another winner in this eighth-grade ‘he-said, she-said’ romance. A fast, funny, egg-cellent winner.” — SLJ, Starred review “With a charismatic leading lady kids will flip over, a compelling dynamic between the two narrators and a resonant ending, this novel is a great deal larger than the sum of its parts.” —Publishers Weekly, Starred review
Book Synopsis The Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Book Three: Titan's Curse by : Rick Riordan
Download or read book The Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Book Three: Titan's Curse written by Rick Riordan and published by Disney-Hyperion. This book was released on 2007-05 with total page 328 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this third book of the acclaimed series, Percy and his friends are escorting two new half-bloods safely to camp when they are intercepted by a manticore and learn that the goddess Artemis has been kidnapped.
Book Synopsis This Way for the Gas, Ladies and Gentlemen by : Tadeusz Borowski
Download or read book This Way for the Gas, Ladies and Gentlemen written by Tadeusz Borowski and published by Penguin. This book was released on 1992-08-01 with total page 196 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Tadeusz Borowski’s concentration camp stories were based on his own experiences surviving Auschwitz and Dachau. In spare, brutal prose he describes a world where where the will to survive overrides compassion and prisoners eat, work and sleep a few yards from where others are murdered; where the difference between human beings is reduced to a second bowl of soup, an extra blanket or the luxury of a pair of shoes with thick soles; and where the line between normality and abnormality vanishes. Published in Poland after the Second World War, these stories constitute a masterwork of world literature. For more than seventy years, Penguin has been the leading publisher of classic literature in the English-speaking world. With more than 1,700 titles, Penguin Classics represents a global bookshelf of the best works throughout history and across genres and disciplines. Readers trust the series to provide authoritative texts enhanced by introductions and notes by distinguished scholars and contemporary authors, as well as up-to-date translations by award-winning translators.
Book Synopsis Pregnancy Day By Day by : Maggie Blott
Download or read book Pregnancy Day By Day written by Maggie Blott and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2009-08-17 with total page 498 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The complete guide to pregnancy, day-by-day No other pregnancy book provides this level of detail, allied with such extraordinary photographs, 3D scans and illustrations which reveal in unprecedented clarity exactly what is happening to you and your baby every single day. From early fetal development to how your hormones prepare you for birth, learn from world-class experts. Plus, obstetricians, midwives and parents advise on your baby's development, medical matters, your changing body, diet, fitness and much more. A special hour-by-hour rundown of what to expect during and immediately after birth, plus further reassurance for the first two weeks of your baby's life, will give a helping hand through the culmination of your pregnancy, from pain relief to those first intimate and unique moments between you and your child.
Book Synopsis Freak the Mighty by : Rodman Philbrick
Download or read book Freak the Mighty written by Rodman Philbrick and published by Usborne Publishing Ltd. This book was released on 2015-04-01 with total page 140 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Max is used to being called Stupid. And he is used to everyone being scared of him. On account of his size and looking like his dad. Kevin is used to being called Dwarf. And he is used to everyone laughing at him. On account of his size and being some cripple kid. But greatness comes in all sizes, and together Max and Kevin become Freak The Mighty and walk high above the world. An inspiring, heartbreaking, multi-award winning international bestseller.
Book Synopsis The Things They Carried by : Tim O'Brien
Download or read book The Things They Carried written by Tim O'Brien and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2009-10-13 with total page 259 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A classic work of American literature that has not stopped changing minds and lives since it burst onto the literary scene, The Things They Carried is a ground-breaking meditation on war, memory, imagination, and the redemptive power of storytelling. The Things They Carried depicts the men of Alpha Company: Jimmy Cross, Henry Dobbins, Rat Kiley, Mitchell Sanders, Norman Bowker, Kiowa, and the character Tim O’Brien, who has survived his tour in Vietnam to become a father and writer at the age of forty-three. Taught everywhere—from high school classrooms to graduate seminars in creative writing—it has become required reading for any American and continues to challenge readers in their perceptions of fact and fiction, war and peace, courage and fear and longing. The Things They Carried won France's prestigious Prix du Meilleur Livre Etranger and the Chicago Tribune Heartland Prize; it was also a finalist for the Pulitzer Prize and the National Book Critics Circle Award.
Download or read book Bad Bug Book written by Mark Walderhaug and published by Createspace Independent Publishing Platform. This book was released on 2014-01-14 with total page 292 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The Bad Bug Book 2nd Edition, released in 2012, provides current information about the major known agents that cause foodborne illness.Each chapter in this book is about a pathogen—a bacterium, virus, or parasite—or a natural toxin that can contaminate food and cause illness. The book contains scientific and technical information about the major pathogens that cause these kinds of illnesses.A separate “consumer box” in each chapter provides non-technical information, in everyday language. The boxes describe plainly what can make you sick and, more important, how to prevent it.The information provided in this handbook is abbreviated and general in nature, and is intended for practical use. It is not intended to be a comprehensive scientific or clinical reference.The Bad Bug Book is published by the Center for Food Safety and Applied Nutrition (CFSAN) of the Food and Drug Administration (FDA), U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.
Book Synopsis McGraw-Hill's Dictionary of American Idoms and Phrasal Verbs by : Richard A. Spears
Download or read book McGraw-Hill's Dictionary of American Idoms and Phrasal Verbs written by Richard A. Spears and published by McGraw Hill Professional. This book was released on 2006-02-03 with total page 1100 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Learn the language of Nebraska . . .and 49 other states With more entries than any other reference of its kind,McGraw-Hill’s Dictionary of American Idioms and Phrasal Verbs shows you how American English is spoken today. You will find commonly used phrasal verbs, idiomatic expressions, proverbial expressions, and clichés. The dictionary contains more than 24,000 entries, each defined and followed by one or two example sentences. It also includes a Phrase-Finder Index with more than 60,000 entries.
Download or read book Blindsight written by Peter Watts and published by Macmillan. This book was released on 2006-10-03 with total page 388 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Hugo and Shirley Jackson award-winning Peter Watts stands on the cutting edge of hard SF with his acclaimed novel, Blindsight Two months since the stars fell... Two months of silence, while a world held its breath. Now some half-derelict space probe, sparking fitfully past Neptune's orbit, hears a whisper from the edge of the solar system: a faint signal sweeping the cosmos like a lighthouse beam. Whatever's out there isn't talking to us. It's talking to some distant star, perhaps. Or perhaps to something closer, something en route. So who do you send to force introductions with unknown and unknowable alien intellect that doesn't wish to be met? You send a linguist with multiple personalities, her brain surgically partitioned into separate, sentient processing cores. You send a biologist so radically interfaced with machinery that he sees x-rays and tastes ultrasound. You send a pacifist warrior in the faint hope she won't be needed. You send a monster to command them all, an extinct hominid predator once called vampire, recalled from the grave with the voodoo of recombinant genetics and the blood of sociopaths. And you send a synthesist—an informational topologist with half his mind gone—as an interface between here and there. Pray they can be trusted with the fate of a world. They may be more alien than the thing they've been sent to find. At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.
Book Synopsis Designing Science Presentations by : Matt Carter
Download or read book Designing Science Presentations written by Matt Carter and published by Academic Press. This book was released on 2020-11-28 with total page 370 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Designing Science Presentations: A Visual Guide to Figures, Papers, Slides, Posters, and More, Second Edition, guides scientists of any discipline in the design of compelling science communication. Most scientists never receive formal training in the design, delivery and evaluation of scientific communication, yet these skills are essential for publishing in high-quality journals, soliciting funding, attracting lab personnel, and advancing a career. This clear, readable volume fills that gap, providing visually intensive guidance at every step—from the construction of original figures to the presentation and delivery of those figures in papers, slideshows, posters and websites. The book provides pragmatic advice on the preparation and delivery of exceptional scientific presentations and demonstrates hundreds of visually striking presentation techniques. - Features clear headings for each section, indicating its message with graphic illustrations - Provides clear and concise explanations of design principles traditionally taught in design or visualization courses - Includes examples of high-quality figures, page layouts, slides, posters and webpages to aid readers in creating their own presentations - Includes numerous "before and after" examples to illustrate the contrast between poor and outstanding presentations
Download or read book Eileen written by Ottessa Moshfegh and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2016-08-16 with total page 273 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Now a major motion picture streaming on Hulu, starring Anne Hathaway and Thomasin McKenzie Shortlisted for the Man Booker Prize “Eileen is a remarkable piece of writing, always dark and surprising, sometimes ugly and occasionally hilarious. Its first-person narrator is one of the strangest, most messed-up, most pathetic—and yet, in her own inimitable way, endearing—misfits I’ve encountered in fiction. Trust me, you have never read anything remotely like Eileen.” —Washington Post So here we are. My name was Eileen Dunlop. Now you know me. I was twenty-four years old then, and had a job that paid fifty-seven dollars a week as a kind of secretary at a private juvenile correctional facility for teenage boys. I think of it now as what it really was for all intents and purposes—a prison for boys. I will call it Moorehead. Delvin Moorehead was a terrible landlord I had years later, and so to use his name for such a place feels appropriate. In a week, I would run away from home and never go back. This is the story of how I disappeared. The Christmas season offers little cheer for Eileen Dunlop, an unassuming yet disturbed young woman trapped between her role as her alcoholic father’s caretaker in a home whose squalor is the talk of the neighborhood and a day job as a secretary at the boys’ prison, filled with its own quotidian horrors. Consumed by resentment and self-loathing, Eileen tempers her dreary days with perverse fantasies and dreams of escaping to the big city. In the meantime, she fills her nights and weekends with shoplifting, stalking a buff prison guard named Randy, and cleaning up her increasingly deranged father’s messes. When the bright, beautiful, and cheery Rebecca Saint John arrives on the scene as the new counselor at Moorehead, Eileen is enchanted and proves unable to resist what appears at first to be a miraculously budding friendship. In a Hitchcockian twist, her affection for Rebecca ultimately pulls her into complicity in a crime that surpasses her wildest imaginings. Played out against the snowy landscape of coastal New England in the days leading up to Christmas, young Eileen’s story is told from the gimlet-eyed perspective of the now much older narrator. Creepy, mesmerizing, and sublimely funny, in the tradition of Shirley Jackson and early Vladimir Nabokov, this powerful debut novel enthralls and shocks, and introduces one of the most original new voices in contemporary literature. Ottessa Moshfegh is also the author of My Year of Rest and Relaxation, Homesick for Another World: Stories, and McGlue.
