101 Terrible Zombie Jokes

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101 Terrible Zombie Jokes

Author : John Rhea
Publisher : The Undead Institute
ISBN 13 :
Total Pages : 24 pages
Book Rating : 4./5 ( download)

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Book Synopsis 101 Terrible Zombie Jokes by : John Rhea

Download or read book 101 Terrible Zombie Jokes written by John Rhea and published by The Undead Institute. This book was released on with total page 24 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: You’ve heard of a zombie only a mother could love, well this is a joke book only a dad could love. Well him and all those with refined tastes in fatherly humor. You’ll laugh, cry and definitely groan (or is it moan?) at these original, zombie-themed jokes from the braaains behind the Undead Institute. Here’s a sample of the horrors you’ll find between these pages: What did the zombie say after feasting at the insane asylum? Tastes like nuts. What do you call a zombie in a pool with no arms or legs? Bob. What’s scarier than a zombie in a clown suit? Nothing. How would you describe both a zombie ninja and zombie flatulence? Silent but undeadly. What’s the difference between a dad joke and a zombie joke? The sound: groans versus moans. A vampire, a ghost, and a zombie walk into a bar. A few minutes later, who walks out? Two zombie vampires and a very lonely ghost. What do you call a horde of bad zombie jokes? This book. How can you tell if the dealer at your weekly poker game is a zombie? If he shuffles with his feet. If you don’t love this joke book, there’s probably something very, very right with you.

Professor Blusterhiny's Zombish 101

Author : John Rhea
Publisher : The Undead Institute
ISBN 13 :
Total Pages : 116 pages
Book Rating : 4./5 ( download)

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Book Synopsis Professor Blusterhiny's Zombish 101 by : John Rhea

Download or read book Professor Blusterhiny's Zombish 101 written by John Rhea and published by The Undead Institute. This book was released on with total page 116 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Put those zombie fighting skills to the test with this workbook featuring Professor Blusterhiny’s zombish language course and skills you’ve learned in the first six books from the Undead Institute. You’ll build a website for Professor Blusterhiny’s Zombish 101 course, a course dedicated to teaching survivors how to talk to their zombified loved ones. With nothing but your wits and web skills you’ll take the website from a blank page through creating a fully functional, responsive website. You’ll be guided step by step through creating the underlying HTML, using CSS to add color and design and layout, addressing some usability issues, building forms, adding a free lesson page and converting the site into a responsive design so that it’ll work in any size browser. While anyone possessing a penchant for silliness and zombies with HTML and CSS knowledge should be able to build this website, the six books this workbook was made to accompany are - A Beginner’s Guide to Learning HTML (and Smacking Zombies Upside the Web Development) - Beginner CSS: Like Putting Lipstick on a Zombie - Beginner Usability: A Novice’s Guide to Zombie Proofing Your Website - HTML Forms & Interactive Elements: Or How to Poke a Zombie in the Eye - Intermediate CSS: Zombie in a Cocktail Dress - Responsive Design: An Undead Introduction to Mobile Web Development

Zombies According to Savage Chickens

Author : Doug Savage
Publisher : Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN 13 : 1449439780
Total Pages : 54 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (494 download)

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Book Synopsis Zombies According to Savage Chickens by : Doug Savage

Download or read book Zombies According to Savage Chickens written by Doug Savage and published by Andrews McMeel Publishing. This book was released on 2012-12-18 with total page 54 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: If the Internet has taught us anything, it’s that the zombie apocalypse is looming, and it’s coming soon. In order to protect ourselves from the zombies’ grumbling stomachs, it makes sense to prepare by studying a handbook to the nethermost depths of the zombie’s psyche. Zombies According to Savage Chickens is not that guide; however, this e-book original collection of comics certainly makes for a more amusing read, which, after all, is what truly matters. Doug Savage, the cartoonist who has maintained the hilarious Savage Chickens web comic blog since 2005 by uploading sticky notes illustrated with the antics of his clever cast of characters, has imagined another memorable type of Savage Chicken: the Zombie Chickens. Zombies have one thing on their minds: BRAINS. But that doesn't necessarily mean that they run amuck all day looking for the next lucky person in the land-of-the-living to provide lunch. How might a zombie interact at an art auction, wedding, or job interview? What is their ideal Valentine’s Day gift, and how would a zombie Shakespeare have taken his plays to the Globe? These are exactly the questions—the totally relevant questions—about the imminent zombie takeover that only Mr. Savage has the guts (and the brains) to tackle. After all, why study up on the zombie apocalypse when you can laugh at the expense of the undead instead?

Dad Jokes

Author : Editors of Portable Press
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1684120071
Total Pages : 254 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (841 download)

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Book Synopsis Dad Jokes by : Editors of Portable Press

Download or read book Dad Jokes written by Editors of Portable Press and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2017-09-01 with total page 254 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Dad’s comedy arsenal is about to get a huge upgrade . . . to the relief of everyone around him! Cue the groans. Put an end to courtesy laughs and awkward silences with the jokes in this book! From the people who brought you Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader, this is an eclectic collection of the punniest, funniest, most outrageous knee-slappers that have ever been told! At work, at home, at the game—Dad will beat them all to the punch—line, that is! He’ll be hip and humorous with totally bodacious jokes like these: Einstein developed a theory about space. And it was about time, too! Why is Christmas just like another day in the office? Because you do all the work and some fat guy in a suit gets all the credit! Dad: “I wouldn’t want to be buried in this graveyard.” Kid: “Why not?” Dad: “Because I'm not dead yet!” And many more!

101 Ways to Gross Out Your Friends

Author : Julie Huffman
Publisher : Walter Foster Jr.
ISBN 13 : 1633221687
Total Pages : 147 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (332 download)

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Book Synopsis 101 Ways to Gross Out Your Friends by : Julie Huffman

Download or read book 101 Ways to Gross Out Your Friends written by Julie Huffman and published by Walter Foster Jr.. This book was released on 2016-10-10 with total page 147 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: 101 Ways to Gross Out Your Friends shows kids how to use science and activities to make slimy snot, gorilla poop, and more to, well, gross out their friends!

Furiously Happy

Author : Jenny Lawson
Publisher : Picador
ISBN 13 : 1743540256
Total Pages : 315 pages
Book Rating : 4.7/5 (435 download)

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Book Synopsis Furiously Happy by : Jenny Lawson

Download or read book Furiously Happy written by Jenny Lawson and published by Picador. This book was released on 2015-10-01 with total page 315 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: For fans of David Sedaris, Tina Fey and Caitlin Moran comes the new book from Jenny Lawson, author of the #1 New York Times bestseller Let's Pretend This Never Happened... In Let's Pretend This Never Happened, Jenny Lawson regaled readers with uproarious stories of her bizarre childhood. In her new book, Furiously Happy, she explores her lifelong battle with mental illness. A hysterical, ridiculous book about crippling depression and anxiety? That sounds like a terrible idea. And terrible ideas are what Jenny does best. As Jenny says: "You can't experience pain without also experiencing the baffling and ridiculous moments of being fiercely, unapologetically, intensely and (above all) furiously happy." It's a philosophy that has - quite literally - saved her life. Jenny's first book, Let's Pretend This Never Happened, was ostensibly about family, but deep down it was about celebrating your own weirdness. Furiously Happy is a book about mental illness, but under the surface it's about embracing joy in fantastic and outrageous ways. And who doesn't need a bit more of that?

Alice in Zombieland

Author : Gena Showalter
Publisher : Harlequin
ISBN 13 : 1460318153
Total Pages : 409 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (63 download)

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Book Synopsis Alice in Zombieland by : Gena Showalter

Download or read book Alice in Zombieland written by Gena Showalter and published by Harlequin. This book was released on 2013-08-27 with total page 409 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A modern-day Alice in Wonderland meets the undead... Alice in Zombieland, the first book in The White Rabbit Chronicles, introduces readers to a world newly overrun by zombies...and the one girl who may be able to save mankind. She won''t rest until she''s sent every walking corpse back to its grave. Had anyone told Alice Bell that her entire life would change course between one heartbeat and the next, she would have laughed. But that''s all it took. One heartbeat. A blink, a breath, a second, and everything she knew and loved was gone. Her father was right. The monsters are real. To avenge her family, Ali must learn to fight the undead. To survive, she must learn to trust the baddest of the bad boys, Cole Holland. But Cole has secrets of his own, and if Ali isn''t careful, those secrets might just prove to be more dangerous than the zombies. The White Rabbit Chronicles: Alice in Zombieland Through the Zombie Glass The Queen of Zombie Hearts A Mad Zombie Party

A Dad Joke a Day

Author : DaddiLife Books
Publisher :
ISBN 13 :
Total Pages : 190 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (6 download)

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Book Synopsis A Dad Joke a Day by : DaddiLife Books

Download or read book A Dad Joke a Day written by DaddiLife Books and published by . This book was released on 2021-05-19 with total page 190 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Looking for the perfect gift for dad? Then keep reading... Unleash dads' ultimate superpower with a terribly good dad joke for EVERYDAY of the year! Can A Dad Joke A Day keep the doctor away? Perhaps not. But a dad joke in the right hands can keep the kids and family on their toes, and at their eye rolling best! In this book from DaddiLife Books - the dads and writers behind the leading platform for modern day fathers - there's a different clean and family friendly dad joke everyday, with groan worthy tummy ticklers on specific calendar days of the year too (see if you can spot them all). What makes this book of dad jokes a special gift: Create a little family fun, everyday - A different cheesy and punny dad joke for every day of the year, including Leap Years, so dad can be top of his dad joke game 24/7 with knee slappers such as: Why was the broom running late? It over-swept. And, What do you call a hen who counts her eggs? A mathemachicken. Understand the science behind the dad joke - How our brains understand dad jokes differently to normal jokes, and the psychology behind a great dad joke versus an average dad joke. Sharpen your joke telling - Whether for new dads or (ahem) more experienced dads, for those who need a cheesy dad joke for a wedding speech or an everyday family laugh, this book has the best advice from across the DaddiLife community on how to tell a dad joke to its very finest, even if you have never told a dad joke before (seriously, where have you been)! Tell dad jokes on specific days of the year - Whether it's New Year, Christmas, or Star Wars day, you won't just be funny, but hilariously punny with these bad dad jokes! What Amazon readers are saying: ★★★★★ "An easy read, silly, and a great way to get the family involved and laughing together." ★★★★★ "Bought for my husband. He really likes it. He looks at more than one per day though because he can't resist learning new dad jokes." ★★★★★ "I could not help laughing my a** off reading these." ★★★★★ "The kids love the jokes and keep poring through the pages to find a new joke to tell us and their Dad has really enjoyed learning the science behind the dad joke and how to tell the perfect dad joke." ★★★★★ "The jokes themselves are exactly what you want from a dad joke - cringey, tut-inducing, eye-rolling. As soon as I got the book, we started by reading a joke from our family's birthdays." If you're looking for a fantastic gift for dad for Father's Day, Birthdays or Christmas, arm Dad with everything he needs for his ultimate mission - joining the Dad Joke Hall of Fame - by clicking the Add to Cart button.

Bad Dad Jokes

Author : Willow Creek Press
Publisher :
ISBN 13 : 9781682348338
Total Pages : 0 pages
Book Rating : 4.3/5 (483 download)

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Book Synopsis Bad Dad Jokes by : Willow Creek Press

Download or read book Bad Dad Jokes written by Willow Creek Press and published by . This book was released on 2018 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The dad joke is a delicate thing. Part knowing humor, part lack of humor, it's only requirement is that it elicits not a laugh from its audience but the annoyed response: "Daaaaaaaaad." Bad Dad Jokes is the biggest, baddest collection of "so bad they're actually good" jokes that are guaranteed to deliver a daily dose of groans and giggles. Bad Dad Jokes is a one of a kind collection of extraordinary humor in one book. By giving this collection as a gift you will bring humor and lasting memories to events for years to come.

Don't Fear the Reaper

Author : Stephen Graham Jones
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1982186615
Total Pages : 480 pages
Book Rating : 4.9/5 (821 download)

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Book Synopsis Don't Fear the Reaper by : Stephen Graham Jones

Download or read book Don't Fear the Reaper written by Stephen Graham Jones and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2023-02-07 with total page 480 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A Locus Award Finalist NATIONAL BESTSELLER December 12th, 2019, Jade returns to the rural lake town of Proofrock the same day as convicted Indigenous serial killer Dark Mill South escapes into town to complete his revenge killings, in this “superb” (Publishers Weekly) sequel to My Heart Is a Chainsaw from New York Times bestselling author Stephen Graham Jones. Four years after her tumultuous senior year, Jade Daniels is released from prison right before Christmas when her conviction is overturned. But life beyond bars takes a dangerous turn as soon as she returns to Proofrock. Convicted Serial Killer, Dark Mill South, seeking revenge for thirty-eight Dakota men hanged in 1862, escapes from his prison transfer due to a blizzard, just outside of Proofrock, Idaho. Dark Mill South’s Reunion Tour began on December 12th, 2019, a Thursday. Thirty-six hours and twenty bodies later, on Friday the 13th, it would be over. Don’t Fear the Reaper is the “adrenaline-filled” (Library Journal, starred review) sequel to My Heart Is a Chainsaw from New York Times bestselling author Stephen Graham Jones.

The Things They Carried

Author : Tim O'Brien
Publisher : HarperCollins
ISBN 13 : 0547420293
Total Pages : 259 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (474 download)

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Book Synopsis The Things They Carried by : Tim O'Brien

Download or read book The Things They Carried written by Tim O'Brien and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2009-10-13 with total page 259 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A classic work of American literature that has not stopped changing minds and lives since it burst onto the literary scene, The Things They Carried is a ground-breaking meditation on war, memory, imagination, and the redemptive power of storytelling. The Things They Carried depicts the men of Alpha Company: Jimmy Cross, Henry Dobbins, Rat Kiley, Mitchell Sanders, Norman Bowker, Kiowa, and the character Tim O’Brien, who has survived his tour in Vietnam to become a father and writer at the age of forty-three. Taught everywhere—from high school classrooms to graduate seminars in creative writing—it has become required reading for any American and continues to challenge readers in their perceptions of fact and fiction, war and peace, courage and fear and longing. The Things They Carried won France's prestigious Prix du Meilleur Livre Etranger and the Chicago Tribune Heartland Prize; it was also a finalist for the Pulitzer Prize and the National Book Critics Circle Award.

Zombies vs. Unicorns

Author : Holly Black
Publisher : S&S/Saga Press
ISBN 13 : 148144283X
Total Pages : 432 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (814 download)

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Book Synopsis Zombies vs. Unicorns by : Holly Black

Download or read book Zombies vs. Unicorns written by Holly Black and published by S&S/Saga Press. This book was released on 2015-07-28 with total page 432 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: It’s the epic battle of brains against manes. Which side are you on? It’s a question as old as time itself: which is better, the zombie or the unicorn? This all-original anthology edited by Holly Black (Team Unicorn) and Justine Larbalestier (Team Zombie) makes strong arguments for both sides in the form of spectacular short stories. Half of the stories portray the strengths—for good and evil—of unicorns, and half show the good (and really, really badass) side of zombies. Contributors include many bestselling authors, including Cassandra Clare, Libba Bray, Maureen Johnson, Meg Cabot, Scott Westerfeld, and Margo Lanagan. This anthology will have everyone asking: Team Zombie or Team Unicorn?

Blindsight

Author : Peter Watts
Publisher : Macmillan
ISBN 13 : 1429955198
Total Pages : 388 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (299 download)

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Book Synopsis Blindsight by : Peter Watts

Download or read book Blindsight written by Peter Watts and published by Macmillan. This book was released on 2006-10-03 with total page 388 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Hugo and Shirley Jackson award-winning Peter Watts stands on the cutting edge of hard SF with his acclaimed novel, Blindsight Two months since the stars fell... Two months of silence, while a world held its breath. Now some half-derelict space probe, sparking fitfully past Neptune's orbit, hears a whisper from the edge of the solar system: a faint signal sweeping the cosmos like a lighthouse beam. Whatever's out there isn't talking to us. It's talking to some distant star, perhaps. Or perhaps to something closer, something en route. So who do you send to force introductions with unknown and unknowable alien intellect that doesn't wish to be met? You send a linguist with multiple personalities, her brain surgically partitioned into separate, sentient processing cores. You send a biologist so radically interfaced with machinery that he sees x-rays and tastes ultrasound. You send a pacifist warrior in the faint hope she won't be needed. You send a monster to command them all, an extinct hominid predator once called vampire, recalled from the grave with the voodoo of recombinant genetics and the blood of sociopaths. And you send a synthesist—an informational topologist with half his mind gone—as an interface between here and there. Pray they can be trusted with the fate of a world. They may be more alien than the thing they've been sent to find. At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.

The Enemy

Author : Charlie Higson
Publisher : Little, Brown Books for Young Readers
ISBN 13 : 1423188993
Total Pages : 452 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (231 download)

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Book Synopsis The Enemy by : Charlie Higson

Download or read book The Enemy written by Charlie Higson and published by Little, Brown Books for Young Readers. This book was released on 2013-01-02 with total page 452 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In the wake of a devastating disease, everyone sixteen and older is either dead or a decomposing, brainless creature with a ravenous appetite for flesh. Teens have barricaded themselves in buildings throughout London and venture outside only when they need to scavenge for food. The group of kids living a Waitrose supermarket is beginning to run out of options. When a mysterious traveler arrives and offers them safe haven at Buckingham Palace, they begin a harrowing journey across London. But their fight is far from over???the threat from within the palace is as real as the one outside it. Full of unexpected twists and quick-thinking heroes, The Enemy is a fast-paced, white-knuckle tale of survival in the face of unimaginable horror.

The Girl's Guide to the Apocalypse

Author : Daphne Lamb
Publisher : Booktrope Editions
ISBN 13 : 9781513701189
Total Pages : 0 pages
Book Rating : 4.7/5 (11 download)

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Book Synopsis The Girl's Guide to the Apocalypse by : Daphne Lamb

Download or read book The Girl's Guide to the Apocalypse written by Daphne Lamb and published by Booktrope Editions. This book was released on 2015-08-11 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Welcome to the Apocalypse. Your forecast includes acid rain, roving gangs and misplaced priorities, in this comedic take on the end of the world as we know it, from debut author Daphne Lamb. As a self-entitled, self-involved, and ill equipped millennial, Verdell probably wouldn't have ranked very high on the list of those most likely to survive the end of the world, but here she is anyway. Add in travelling with her work addicted boss, her boyfriend who she has "meh" feelings for, and a handful of others who had no businesses surviving as long as they have, and things aren't exactly going as planned. But despite threats of cannibalism, infected water supplies, and possibly even mutants, Verdell is willing to put in as little effort as she can get away with to survive.

Houseswap 101

Author : Jaime Clevenger
Publisher : Bella Books
ISBN 13 : 1642476153
Total Pages : 344 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (424 download)

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Book Synopsis Houseswap 101 by : Jaime Clevenger

Download or read book Houseswap 101 written by Jaime Clevenger and published by Bella Books. This book was released on 2024-04-01 with total page 344 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When Devyn Lancaster comes home from a busy shift at the hospital, the last thing she expects to find is a woman weed-whacking her garden. It gets worse when she learns her ex-husband invited the woman to trade houses with him—all without telling her a thing about the plan. Robbie Price was looking forward to a month-long vacation in San Diego. A break from the Seattle rain in exchange for doing a few home repair projects and taking a cute dog to the beach seemed well worth a house swap. Then she meets her coworker’s ex-wife. For Robbie and Devyn, even tolerating each other feels impossible at first. And neither expect to learn to like each other. But at the end of the month, parting ways is what feels impossible.

The Ultimate Dad Joke Book

Author : Hugh Murmie
Publisher :
ISBN 13 :
Total Pages : 108 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (446 download)

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Book Synopsis The Ultimate Dad Joke Book by : Hugh Murmie

Download or read book The Ultimate Dad Joke Book written by Hugh Murmie and published by . This book was released on 2020-05-10 with total page 108 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: New for 2020! Easy Father's Day gift for your favorite guy! The Ultimate Dad Joke Book is jam packed with family friendly, clean and hysterical jokes that are great for everyone from your toddler to your great-grandma! Buckle up and get ready for some knee slapping, head shaking and gut busting laughter every time you flip a page. Over 500 hilarious jokes, puns and one-liners Squeaky clean, family safe jokes for kids (and adults) of all ages Great selection of time honored classics and all new jokes for 2020 Grab your copy today and channel your inner dad with some amazingly groan worthy humor bombs!