Why Cats Are Assholes

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Why Cats are Assholes

Author : Liz Miele
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 151075623X
Total Pages : 192 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (17 download)

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Book Synopsis Why Cats are Assholes by : Liz Miele

Download or read book Why Cats are Assholes written by Liz Miele and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2021-03-30 with total page 192 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Most people love cats. They’re fluffy, playful, and can be a joy to have as a companion. However, they can also be huge assholes. So what can you do? How do you deal with a roommate who always seems to be plotting to kill you? While we all love sharing adorable photos of kittens, these frisky felines are known more for marching to the beat of their own drum than abiding by the rules. From running around your home at two in the morning, knocking everything off your shelves, or taking up most of your bed, these furry critters can be immensely selfish and disrespectful to those who give them endless love and affection. Why Cats Are Assholes is up for such a challenge. From studying their history all the way back to ancient Egypt, comedian Liz Miele—the daughter of veterinarians—digests the cat psyche to try and understand why they do the things they do, and how we, as their loyal servants, can handle domestic bliss with them around. With the help of her cat Pasta, Miele breaks down the common behaviors of cats in an attempt to try and better understand their plan of attack (if there is one), as well as what we can do to better prepare ourselves. Whether you have one, two, or twelve fur babies, Why Cats Are Assholes is the ultimate guide to better understanding your pet’s behavior while taking back your home from these domesticated terrorists.

Cats Are Assholes

Author : Melody Seelye
Publisher :
ISBN 13 : 9781657340312
Total Pages : 52 pages
Book Rating : 4.3/5 (43 download)

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Book Synopsis Cats Are Assholes by : Melody Seelye

Download or read book Cats Are Assholes written by Melody Seelye and published by . This book was released on 2020-01-08 with total page 52 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Cats are fuzzy cute little assholes. This journal prompts you to write down what your fuzzy little asshole did today. Each prompt also includes a real life thing that my own asshole cats have done to me. Write down anything you want in here. It is a lined journal to write your thoughts down on. Use this journal as a conversation piece on a coffee table if you want. Encourage your friends to write their own cat stories in this journal also. This journal can also be used as a notebook diary.

Does This Collar Make My Butt Look Big?

Author : Dena Harris
Publisher :
ISBN 13 : 1607744899
Total Pages : 130 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (77 download)

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Book Synopsis Does This Collar Make My Butt Look Big? by : Dena Harris

Download or read book Does This Collar Make My Butt Look Big? written by Dena Harris and published by . This book was released on 2013 with total page 130 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This diet-guide parody shows "extra furry" cats how to get svelte with kitty-specific versions of popular weight-loss and fitness regimes like the Zone, South Beach, Mayo Clinic, and French Women Don't Get Fat (But Their Cats Do). Americans own more than 86 million cats, and the wild popularity of cat videos--from YouTube to the Internet Cat Video Film Festival--proves that cat-lovers can't get enough kitty humor. This book pokes fun at tubby tabbies--the world's cutest (and surliest) fat creatures--with laugh-out-loud details that will tickle the funnybone of anyone "owned" by a cat. Lampooning trendy weight-loss regimes and health gurus, this book will also make people feel better about their own battle of the bulge in comparison to cats' insatiable appetites and lazy lifestyles. By eating right for their blood type, sourcing raw and living foods, joining Weight Stalkers, avoiding toxic treats, and exercising while lying down, felines of every shape (round) and size (round) will soon be motivated to ditch the fifth serving of Beef Morsels in Gravy for fresh, local options like that vole in the backyard.

My Cat Is an Asshole

Author : Hank Whitefoot
Publisher : Createspace Independent Publishing Platform
ISBN 13 : 9781532827822
Total Pages : 34 pages
Book Rating : 4.8/5 (278 download)

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Book Synopsis My Cat Is an Asshole by : Hank Whitefoot

Download or read book My Cat Is an Asshole written by Hank Whitefoot and published by Createspace Independent Publishing Platform. This book was released on 2016-06-05 with total page 34 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Like any normal cat, Tobey wants love, affection and attention. Sometimes he shows this very well, other times he is an ass hole. Follow us on his journey as he shows his love and annoyance. You will discover how Tobey rubs his nasty lips on everything in sight, performs the one-leg salute and bugs the hell out of me.

All Cats Are Introverts

Author : Francesco Marciuliano
Publisher : Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN 13 : 1524858455
Total Pages : 130 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (248 download)

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Book Synopsis All Cats Are Introverts by : Francesco Marciuliano

Download or read book All Cats Are Introverts written by Francesco Marciuliano and published by Andrews McMeel Publishing. This book was released on 2019-10-15 with total page 130 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the author of the #1 New York Times bestseller I Could Pee on This: Poems by cats who just need a little “me time.” Have you ever been labeled as “antisocial” because you’d rather stay home on the couch, “shy” because you don’t like big parties, or “lost in your own thoughts” because you don’t realize someone’s been calling your name 148 times? The cats understand. All Cats Are Introverts is a collection of self-reflective poetry from cats that clearly shows them to be the insightful, often alert, crowd-averse, personally engaging, probably napping-as-we-speak introverts of the animal kingdom. Enjoy this completely relatable and hilarious book, and perhaps you will soon see the cat—and even yourself—in a whole new light.

Prince Of Cats

Author : Ronald Wimberly
Publisher : Image Comics
ISBN 13 : 1534301437
Total Pages : 154 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (343 download)

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Book Synopsis Prince Of Cats by : Ronald Wimberly

Download or read book Prince Of Cats written by Ronald Wimberly and published by Image Comics. This book was released on 2016-10-26 with total page 154 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: PRINCE OF CATS is the B side to Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, played at an eighties block party in an NY where underground sword dueling blossomed alongside hip-hop, punk, disco, and no wave. Itês the story of the minor players with Tybalt at the center. The definitive printing of RONALD WIMBERLY's critically-acclaimed first work, presented as intended for the first time.

I Could Pee on This

Author : Francesco Marciuliano
Publisher : Chronicle Books
ISBN 13 : 1452121869
Total Pages : 111 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (521 download)

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Book Synopsis I Could Pee on This by : Francesco Marciuliano

Download or read book I Could Pee on This written by Francesco Marciuliano and published by Chronicle Books. This book was released on 2012-08-03 with total page 111 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Animal lovers will laugh out loud at the quirkiness of their feline friends with these insightful and curious poems from the singular minds of funny cats. In this hilarious, bestselling book of tongue-in-cheek poetry. The author of the internationally syndicated comic strip Sally Forth helps cats unlock their creative potential and explain their odd behavior to ignorant humans. With titles like "Who Is That on Your Lap?," "This Is My Chair," "Kneel Before Me," "Nudge," and "Some of My Best Friends Are Dogs," the poems collected in I Could Pee on This perfectly capture the inner workings of the cat psyche. With photos of the cat "authors" throughout, this whimsical animal book reveals kitties at their wackiest, and most exasperating (but always lovable). Ideal for that "crazy cat lady" or "cat mom/dad" in your life this collection of poems makes for the perfect cat-themed gift for anyone who's obsessed with our feline friends.

Lazy-Ass Cats

Author : Lindsay Conner
Publisher : Mascot Books
ISBN 13 : 9781684010448
Total Pages : 0 pages
Book Rating : 4.0/5 (14 download)

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Book Synopsis Lazy-Ass Cats by : Lindsay Conner

Download or read book Lazy-Ass Cats written by Lindsay Conner and published by Mascot Books. This book was released on 2017-03-07 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Trouble in Purradise? Having a catastrophic day? Unwind with the Lazy-Ass Cats Coloring Book. Whip out your colored pencilsforty clever coloring pages are ready for your artistic touch. Haven't tried coloring? You have got to be kitten me. A hilarious gift for coloring enthusiasts, cat lovers, and even people who don't know they like to color yet, the book features single-sided pages on crisp, quality paper.

Cat Daddy

Author : Jackson Galaxy
Publisher : TarcherPerigee
ISBN 13 : 0399163808
Total Pages : 322 pages
Book Rating : 4.3/5 (991 download)

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Book Synopsis Cat Daddy by : Jackson Galaxy

Download or read book Cat Daddy written by Jackson Galaxy and published by TarcherPerigee. This book was released on 2013-05-02 with total page 322 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Cat behaviorist and star of Animal Planet's hit television show "My Cat from Hell," Galaxy, a.k.a. "Cat Daddy," isn't what readers might expect for a cat expert. Yet his ability to connect with even the most troubled felines--not to mention their owners--is awe-inspiring.

Why Cats Paint

Author : Burton Silver
Publisher : Random House Digital, Inc.
ISBN 13 : 9781580087933
Total Pages : 162 pages
Book Rating : 4.0/5 (879 download)

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Book Synopsis Why Cats Paint by : Burton Silver

Download or read book Why Cats Paint written by Burton Silver and published by Random House Digital, Inc.. This book was released on 2006 with total page 162 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In 1994, WHY CATS PAINT took the art world and animal world by storm with its unprecedented photographic record of cat creativity. Those seminal books in feline aesthetics are now offered in new pocket-size editions filled with the best from each volume, making purrfect gifts for cat lovers and art lovers alike.Reviews"great for stocking stuffers."-Cleveland Plain Dealer

Metal Cats

Author : Alexandra Crockett
Publisher : powerHouse Books
ISBN 13 : 1576877299
Total Pages : 140 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (768 download)

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Book Synopsis Metal Cats by : Alexandra Crockett

Download or read book Metal Cats written by Alexandra Crockett and published by powerHouse Books. This book was released on 2014-05-13 with total page 140 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Skulls and Siamese. Corpse paint and Persians. Baphomet, pentagrams, blood, and tabbies! Metal Cats combines two amazing subjects: the extreme personalities of the hardcore metal music scene and their adorable kitties. These incredibly cute and fluffy felines have been photographed with their loving owners in and around the dark abodes of musicians, fans, and promoters of metal including members of the bands Black Goat, Thrones, Isis, Lightning Swords of Death, Book of Black Earth, Skarp, Harassor, Akimbo, Aldebaran, Atriarch, Oak, Ghoul, Ludicra, Holy Grail, Xasthur, Cattle Decapitation, Murder Construct, Exhumed, Morbid Angel, Municipal Waste, Skeletonwitch, Gypsyhawk, Nausea, Phobia, and Napalm Death. Metal isn't all dark and disturbing, violent and misanthropic. Metal Cats is proof that while the music may be brutal, the people in the scene are softies for their pets just like you and me... A portion of the proceeds from this book and a series of benefit shows held along the West Coast will go towards one no-kill shelter in each of the four main cities visited.

Why Cat Why

Author : Theo Nicole Lorenz
Publisher : Theo Lorenz
ISBN 13 : 9780997573848
Total Pages : 56 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (738 download)

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Book Synopsis Why Cat Why by : Theo Nicole Lorenz

Download or read book Why Cat Why written by Theo Nicole Lorenz and published by Theo Lorenz. This book was released on 2017-11-16 with total page 56 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Why do cats do the weird things they do? Why do we let these pointy, inconvenient creatures and their buttholes into our homes? This book explains cats (and why we love them) with 26 fun and informative coloring pages.

Adventure Cats

Author : Laura J. Moss
Publisher : Workman Publishing
ISBN 13 : 0761193561
Total Pages : 225 pages
Book Rating : 4.7/5 (611 download)

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Book Synopsis Adventure Cats by : Laura J. Moss

Download or read book Adventure Cats written by Laura J. Moss and published by Workman Publishing. This book was released on 2017-05-16 with total page 225 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Just when you thought you knew all there was to know about cats comes the ultimate—and unexpected—guide to taking your cat into the wild. Here are cats walking on a leash. Cats hiking on a leash. Cats tramping through snow. Cats camping. Cats kayaking, canoeing, even surfing—yes, cats who love water. When animal writer and active hiker Laura Moss couldn’t find an online resource for hitting the trail with her cat, she created one. AdventureCats.org took off like wildfire, with attention from Wired, the Huffington Post, Outside magazine, BuzzFeed, and much more. Now, the book Adventure Cats—a collection of jaw-dropping photographs, inspiring stories of real-life cats, and all the how-to a cat owner needs—will take readers and their cats well beyond the backyard. Learn how to leash-train a cat. What to do if you encounter wildlife on the trail. Plus, winter safety tips, and how to bring a little bit of the outdoors to an indoor cat. The stories themselves are catnip for animal lovers, from Nanakuli, the one-eyed cat who hangs ten; to Georgie, a four-year-old gray tabby who lives on a sailboat; to Quandary, who not only insists on hiking with her family but also teaches them a valuable lesson: When you follow your cat’s natural tendency to wander, you experience the outdoors at a slower, richer pace. This book will delight every cat person, regardless of whether their pet is inclined to adventure. (Take the quiz at the beginning of the book to find out!)

The Other End of the Leash

Author : Patricia McConnell, Ph.D.
Publisher : Ballantine Books
ISBN 13 : 0307489183
Total Pages : 289 pages
Book Rating : 4.3/5 (74 download)

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Book Synopsis The Other End of the Leash by : Patricia McConnell, Ph.D.

Download or read book The Other End of the Leash written by Patricia McConnell, Ph.D. and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 2009-02-19 with total page 289 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Learn to communicate with your dog—using their language “Good reading for dog lovers and an immensely useful manual for dog owners.”—The Washington Post An Applied Animal Behaviorist and dog trainer with more than twenty years’ experience, Dr. Patricia McConnell reveals a revolutionary new perspective on our relationship with dogs—sharing insights on how “man’s best friend” might interpret our behavior, as well as essential advice on how to interact with our four-legged friends in ways that bring out the best in them. After all, humans and dogs are two entirely different species, each shaped by its individual evolutionary heritage. Quite simply, humans are primates and dogs are canids (as are wolves, coyotes, and foxes). Since we each speak a different native tongue, a lot gets lost in the translation. This marvelous guide demonstrates how even the slightest changes in our voices and in the ways we stand can help dogs understand what we want. Inside you will discover: • How you can get your dog to come when called by acting less like a primate and more like a dog • Why the advice to “get dominance” over your dog can cause problems • Why “rough and tumble primate play” can lead to trouble—and how to play with your dog in ways that are fun and keep him out of mischief • How dogs and humans share personality types—and why most dogs want to live with benevolent leaders rather than “alpha wanna-bes!” Fascinating, insightful, and compelling, The Other End of the Leash is a book that strives to help you connect with your dog in a completely new way—so as to enrich that most rewarding of relationships.

How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You

Author : The Oatmeal
Publisher : Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN 13 : 1449410499
Total Pages : 138 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (494 download)

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Book Synopsis How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You by : The Oatmeal

Download or read book How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You written by The Oatmeal and published by Andrews McMeel Publishing. This book was released on 2012-10-09 with total page 138 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Jesus Rollerblading Christ--another helping of TheOatmeal! Mrow, MOAR kitty comics. Mr. Oats delivers a sidesplitting serving of cat humor in his new book, How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You. If your cat is kneading you, that's not a sign of affection. Your cat is actually checking your internal organs for weakness. If your cat brings you a dead animal, this isn't a gift. It's a warning. How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You is a hilarious, brilliant offering of comics, facts, and instructional guides about crazy cat behaviors from the creative wonderland at TheOatmeal.com. How to Tell If Your Cat Is Plotting to Kill You presents fan favorites, such as "Cat vs. Internet," "How to Pet a Kitty," and "The Bobcats," plus 17 brand-new, never-before-seen cat-themed comic strips. This Oatmeal collection is a must-have for cat-lovers from Mr. Oats!

The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America

Author : Matt Kracht
Publisher : Chronicle Books
ISBN 13 : 1452177392
Total Pages : 178 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (521 download)

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Book Synopsis The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America by : Matt Kracht

Download or read book The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America written by Matt Kracht and published by Chronicle Books. This book was released on 2019-04-02 with total page 178 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: National bestselling book: Featured on Midwest, Mountain Plains, New Atlantic, Northern, Pacific Northwest and Southern Regional Indie Bestseller Lists Perfect book for the birder and anti-birder alike A humorous look at 50 common North American dumb birds: For those who have a disdain for birds or bird lovers with a sense of humor, this snarky, illustrated handbook is equal parts profane, funny, and—let's face it—true. Featuring common North American birds, such as the White-Breasted Butt Nugget and the Goddamned Canada Goose (or White-Breasted Nuthatch and Canada Goose for the layperson), Matt Kracht identifies all the idiots in your backyard and details exactly why they suck with humorous, yet angry, ink drawings. With The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America, you won't need to wonder what all that racket is anymore! • Each entry is accompanied by facts about a bird's (annoying) call, its (dumb) migratory pattern, its (downright tacky) markings, and more. • The essential guide to all things wings with migratory maps, tips for birding, musings on the avian population, and the ethics of birdwatching. • Matt Kracht is an amateur birder, writer, and illustrator who enjoys creating books that celebrate the humor inherent in life's absurdities. Based in Seattle, he enjoys gazing out the window at the beautiful waters of Puget Sound and making fun of birds. "There are loads of books out there for bird lovers, but until now, nothing for those that love to hate birds. The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America fills the void, packed with snarky illustrations that chastise the flying animals in a funny, profane way. " – Uncrate A humorous animal book with 50 common North American birds for people who love birds and also those who love to hate birds • A perfect coffee table or bar top conversation-starting book • Makes a great Mother's Day, Father's Day, birthday, or retirement gift

Chilling Effect

Author : Valerie Valdes
Publisher : HarperCollins
ISBN 13 : 0062877240
Total Pages : 448 pages
Book Rating : 4.0/5 (628 download)

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Book Synopsis Chilling Effect by : Valerie Valdes

Download or read book Chilling Effect written by Valerie Valdes and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2019-09-17 with total page 448 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “Jam-packed with weird aliens, mysterious artifacts, and lovable characters... a tremendous good time and an impressive debut.” -- Kirkus Reviews (starred) A hilarious, offbeat debut space opera that skewers everything from pop culture to video games and features an irresistible foul-mouthed captain and her motley crew, strange life forms, exciting twists, and a galaxy full of fun and adventure. Captain Eva Innocente and the crew of La Sirena Negra cruise the galaxy delivering small cargo for even smaller profits. When her sister Mari is kidnapped by The Fridge, a shadowy syndicate that holds people hostage in cryostasis, Eva must undergo a series of unpleasant, dangerous missions to pay the ransom. But Eva may lose her mind before she can raise the money. The ship’s hold is full of psychic cats, an amorous fish-faced emperor wants her dead after she rejects his advances, and her sweet engineer is giving her a pesky case of feelings. The worse things get, the more she lies, raising suspicions and testing her loyalty to her found family. To free her sister, Eva will risk everything: her crew, her ship, and the life she’s built on the ashes of her past misdeeds. But when the dominoes start to fall and she finds the real threat is greater than she imagined, she must decide whether to play it cool or burn it all down.