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The Little Red Book Of Little Read Jokes About The Enlightened Left
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Book Synopsis The Little Red Book: Of Little-Read Jokes about the Enlightened Left by : Hermann Observer
Download or read book The Little Red Book: Of Little-Read Jokes about the Enlightened Left written by Hermann Observer and published by Hermann Observer. This book was released on 2019-05-11 with total page 93 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Version 2.0 (2023). Much like Chairman Mao's compilation of zany one-liners published during Communist China's Cultural Revolution back in the day, this little red book is an uproarious collection of madcap humor and senseless drivel dedicated to the countless enlightened leftists still inexplicably omnipresent in our world today. Filled with pun-ridden put-downs and wise-ass wordplay, this remarkable anthology offers unenlightened readers like yourself a thorough introduction into the baffling realm of leftist confusion and a refreshing alternative to the more conventional fare of lowbrow humor you are undoubtedly accustomed to. Your fancy will be tickled with jeering jibes and sarcastic swipes taken at the expense of the leftist elites who rule over us in relentless pursuit of a more progressive and enlightened new world order. But just who are these enlightened leftists of the enlightened left, you ask? I’m glad you did. Enlightened leftists are those who believe that man is “perfectible” (woman too, if we stick to two genders). They believe in equality in a world in which equality does not and cannot exist (there is no equality in nature). They are the ones who always have the “solutions” to our problems, most of these problems being the direct or indirect result of one of their previous enlightened leftist solutions. The enlightened left are the all too optimistic and the all too naïve with the all too good intentions who seem to be the only ones unaware that the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. They are also unaware of their inherent limitations as human beings. They refuse to recognize that we are simply not able to fully understand all the ramifications of our simplest actions, much less the ambitious enlightened leftist reforms they have and repeatedly tried and will try again to introduce. They are rationalists whose reason is not sufficiently able to point out the limitations of their reason. In other words, they are the nannies, the pro-collectivist, the anti-self-reliant, the redistributors and the interventionists who have become so intrusive in our lives today. They can’t accept the idea of government as a system of negation within which individuals can freely develop on their own under the rule of law (a “don't do this, don't do that” model). Enlightened leftists insist that government actively intervene in our lives (a “do this, do that” model), always open for the next “solution” that 1) never delivers the results promised and 2) creates new problems due to the inevitable Law of Unintended Consequences. Enlightened leftists are paternal. They are autocratic. They are above the law because what they do is for “the greater good” that they define. They believe that the ends justify the means. They are the people who say, “we are from the government and are here to help.” The enlightened left are those who refuse to leave the rest of us alone. Although not famous for their sense of humor (telling others how to live their lives and what to think is no laughing matter), enlightened leftists nevertheless provide us with a near endless source of comic delight. This little red book is a modest attempt to tap into that vital source. I hope you will enjoy reading it. I also hope you will remember to buy a few additional copies for your friends and family. I am told it makes a wonderful gift idea, perfect, even, for any perfect or near-perfect stranger you might unexpectedly bump into on the street. It is a very small book. This makes it very easy for you to carry several of them on your person. I carry three of them with me at all times, for instance. I am sitting on two right now as I write these very lines. In closing, please try to keep two things constantly in mind while reading: First of all, many if not most of the enlightened left mean well. Honestly. They really do. Secondly, the road to hell is paved with good intentions.
Book Synopsis 501 German Oddities by : Hermann Observer
Download or read book 501 German Oddities written by Hermann Observer and published by Hermann Observer. This book was released on 2018-11-25 with total page 188 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Do you often feel the uncontrollable urge to drive at ridiculously high speeds when out on the freeway? Does that constant, nagging struggle between the opposing sides of your inferiority-superiority complex keep you up at night? Are you brutally direct, painfully precise and sometimes feel like you’re speaking a foreign language because no one seems to understand you? Vorsicht (watch out)! You might be German. In that case you won’t have any use for this book. Have a nice day. If, on the other hand, you have always been puzzled by odd German Attitudes, Behavior or Cultural practices, then this is the book for you. You are not alone, you see. Nor is there anything wrong with you reacting that way. Your puzzlement is a perfectly healthy and normal human response to the cognitive dissonance and other psychological disrruptions that often dissonate and disrupt when foreigners make unprotected contact with high-grade Germanness. Or at least that’s what a specialist in Vienna told me. As Winston Churchill once said, “Germany is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma.” Actually, he said Russia when he said that but I’m pretty sure he meant Germany. He was Winston Churchill, after all, and he had been around a bit. I certainly would have said Germany. And I wouldn’t, much less couldn’t have said it better myself. Germany and the Germans are indeed enigmatic and, well, really weird sometimes. This collection of random personal observations and unsolicited opinion is an attempt to document just that. I cannot guarantee that this list of German oddities is complete, of course. I can assure you, however, that enjoying these oddities in the privacy of your own home is a relatively safe and effective way to partake in the German experience without any of the harmful side effects. Viel Glück dabei (and good luck with that).
Download or read book Brain Quest written by Hermann Observer and published by Hermann Observer. This book was released on 2017-12-17 with total page 192 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Mission Nemo simply must succeed. If the crew of the Super Small Miniaturized Nano-like Operations Wessel S. S. Minnow fails to destroy the inoperable anti-capitalist coagulum lodged in Morris Moore's progressive brain, how will General De Klein's Federal Department of Antidotes operatives at SUCFACE Mission Control find out if Leftylometazoline (aka LeftX) really works? Would this usher in the final stage of the liberal clerisy’s clandestine collectivist conspiracy to abolish our few remaining individual freedoms forever? That would not please President Thump one microscopic little bit. Join Major Miles Stone and his disturbingly alluring crew on their miniaturized mission through the left and lefter hemispheres of the progressive brain. Their fantastic voyage is a race against time that takes them through such redoubtable regions as the Clinton Vortex, the Che Guevara Gray Area and the Obama Trauma Center itself. Here they bravely confront such anatomical monstrosities as the fantasist frontalis, the hyperbolthalamus and the dreaded pious aspiration node. Their progressive brain journey only gets progressively worse as they are repeatedly attacked by repulsive swarms of nanny neurons, doomsday dendrons, robin hoodlums and the formidable radical egalitarian bacterium. If not for the courage of the fearless crew, and their deadly arsenal of passing phasers, millennial mindset missiles, moral busybody antibodies and Condescendium®, the Minnow would be lost. The Minnow would be lost. The tension never stops building during this thrilling tale of adventure, danger, suspense and romance. And lust. Will Captain Hanna Grenada's irresistible animal magnetism finally seduce the Major into experiencing something vaguely resembling basic human emotion? Can the all too communicative HAL 9999 super computer and his annoying eye drones really be trusted to operate the ship? And will the Minnow's political corrector deflectors and smug shields hold, allowing Stone and his crew to reach their target and ignite the liberal bombast bomb in time? I could tell you but that would ruin the suspense. Not your everyday dystopian science-fiction erotic horror political thriller, this bombastic bombshell of a book knows no shame when it comes to overwhelming you with its serious silliness, wanton wackiness and forthright, flat-out farce. Purchase it now before it is too late or something. Soon to be made into a major motion picture. Or maybe it has been already. There is also time travel involved here, after all.
Book Synopsis Climate Crisis Fun Facts! by : Hermann Observer
Download or read book Climate Crisis Fun Facts! written by Hermann Observer and published by Hermann Observer. This book was released on 2023-09-21 with total page 152 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Take a deep breath. It’s time for Climate Crisis Fun Fact Number One: There is no Climate Crisis. The weather is not your fault. The climate (weather over time) is not your fault either. Yes, the climate is changing. It is changing because it has never not changed. But no, the “pollutant” CO2, anthropogenic or otherwise, is not driving this change. It is driving plant growth. The narrative you are being led to believe is false. The causes for climate change are all natural. Natural, although not yet fully understood. This book is an exercise in humility. It aims to offer those who feel uncomfortable with the arrogant CO2 Climate Crisis consensus of our age a chance to step back and doubt. It is a modest collection of well-documented facts and logical observations that will hopefully help you choose to refuse. Choose to refuse believing those who profit financially or in any other way from the CO2 narrative.
Book Synopsis The Night and Its Moon by : Piper CJ
Download or read book The Night and Its Moon written by Piper CJ and published by Sourcebooks, Inc.. This book was released on 2022-09-20 with total page 441 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: An addictive fantasy romance from TikTok sensation Piper CJ, now newly revised and edited. Two orphans grow into powerful young women as they face countless threats to find their way back to each other. Farleigh is just an orphanage. At least, that's what the church would have the people believe, but beautiful orphans Nox and fae-touched Amaris know better. They are commodities for sale, available for purchase by the highest bidder. So when the madame of a notorious brothel in a far-off city offers a king's ransom to purchase Amaris, Nox ends up taking her place — while Amaris is drawn away to the mountains, home of mysterious assassins. Even as they take up new lives and identities, Nox and Amaris never forget one thing: they will stop at nothing to reunite. But the threat of war looms overhead, and the two are inevitably swept into a conflict between human and fae, magic and mundane. With strange new alliances, untested powers, and a bond that neither time nor distance could possibly break, the fate of the realms lies in the hands of two orphans — and the love they hold for each other.
Book Synopsis The Sense of an Ending by : Julian Barnes
Download or read book The Sense of an Ending written by Julian Barnes and published by Vintage. This book was released on 2011-10-05 with total page 158 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: BOOKER PRIZE WINNER • NATIONAL BESTSELLER • A novel that follows a middle-aged man as he contends with a past he never much thought about—until his closest childhood friends return with a vengeance: one of them from the grave, another maddeningly present. A novel so compelling that it begs to be read in a single setting, The Sense of an Ending has the psychological and emotional depth and sophistication of Henry James at his best, and is a stunning achievement in Julian Barnes's oeuvre. Tony Webster thought he left his past behind as he built a life for himself, and his career has provided him with a secure retirement and an amicable relationship with his ex-wife and daughter, who now has a family of her own. But when he is presented with a mysterious legacy, he is forced to revise his estimation of his own nature and place in the world.
Book Synopsis Dumb Jokes for Smart Folks by : Jessica Delfino
Download or read book Dumb Jokes for Smart Folks written by Jessica Delfino and published by Humorist Media. This book was released on 2020-11-26 with total page 134 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Dumb Jokes for Smart Folks delivers a grown-up spin on the quintessential children's joke book.
Book Synopsis Christopher Cricket on Cats by : Anthony Henderson Euwer
Download or read book Christopher Cricket on Cats written by Anthony Henderson Euwer and published by . This book was released on 1909 with total page 54 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Book Synopsis Let's Pretend This Never Happened by : Jenny Lawson
Download or read book Let's Pretend This Never Happened written by Jenny Lawson and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2013-03-05 with total page 385 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The #1 New York Times bestselling (mostly true) memoir from the hilarious author of Furiously Happy. “Gaspingly funny and wonderfully inappropriate.”—O, The Oprah Magazine When Jenny Lawson was little, all she ever wanted was to fit in. That dream was cut short by her fantastically unbalanced father and a morbidly eccentric childhood. It did, however, open up an opportunity for Lawson to find the humor in the strange shame-spiral that is her life, and we are all the better for it. In the irreverent Let’s Pretend This Never Happened, Lawson’s long-suffering husband and sweet daughter help her uncover the surprising discovery that the most terribly human moments—the ones we want to pretend never happened—are the very same moments that make us the people we are today. For every intellectual misfit who thought they were the only ones to think the things that Lawson dares to say out loud, this is a poignant and hysterical look at the dark, disturbing, yet wonderful moments of our lives. Readers Guide Inside
Book Synopsis First Time for Everything by : Henry Fry
Download or read book First Time for Everything written by Henry Fry and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 2022-05-10 with total page 359 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A “big-hearted” (The Daily Beast), “LOL-worthy” (Cosmopolitan) debut about a down-on-his-luck gay man working out how he fits into the world, making up for lost time, and opening himself up to life’s possibilities “Part of a new wave of authors releasing uplifting queer literature that casts its characters as the heroes of their lives . . . crammed with blossoming romances and glittery escapism.”—The Guardian Danny Scudd is absolutely fine. He always dreamed of escaping the small-town life of his parents’ fish-and-chip shop, moving to London, and becoming a journalist. And, after five years in the city, his career isn’t exactly awful, and his relationship with pretentious Tobbs isn’t exactly unfulfilling. Certainly his limited-edition Dolly Parton vinyls and many (maybe too many) house plants are hitting the spot. But his world is flipped upside down when a visit to the local clinic reveals that Tobbs might not have been exactly faithful. In fact, Tobbs claims they were never operating under the “heteronormative paradigm” of monogamy to begin with. Oh, and Danny’s flatmates are unceremoniously evicting him because they want to start a family. It’s all going quite well. Newly single and with nowhere to live, Danny is forced to move in with his best friend, Jacob, a flamboyant nonbinary artist whom he’s known since childhood, and their eccentric group of friends living in an East London “commune.” What follows is a colorful voyage of discovery through modern queer life, dating, work, and lots of therapy—all places Danny has always been too afraid to fully explore. Upon realizing just how little he knows about himself and his sexuality, he careens from one questionable decision (and man) to another, relying on his inscrutable new therapist and housemates to help him face the demons he’s spent his entire life trying to repress. Is he really fine, after all?
Book Synopsis The Keillor Reader by : Garrison Keillor
Download or read book The Keillor Reader written by Garrison Keillor and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2014-05-01 with total page 400 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Stories, essays, poems, and personal reminiscences from the sage of Lake Wobegon When, at thirteen, he caught on as a sportswriter for the Anoka Herald, Garrison Keillor set out to become a professional writer, and so he has done—a storyteller, sometime comedian, essayist, newspaper columnist, screenwriter, poet. Now a single volume brings together the full range of his work: monologues from A Prairie Home Companion, stories from The New Yorker and The Atlantic, excerpts from novels, newspaper columns. With an extensive introduction and headnotes, photographs, and memorabilia, The Keillor Reader also presents pieces never before published, including the essays “Cheerfulness” and “What We Have Learned So Far.” Keillor is the founder and host of A Prairie Home Companion, celebrating its fortieth anniversary in 2014. He is the author of nineteen books of fiction and humor, the editor of the Good Poems collections, and a member of the American Academy of Arts and Letters.
Book Synopsis Rachel’s Homemade Holiday (Pudding Pantry, Book 2) by : Caroline Roberts
Download or read book Rachel’s Homemade Holiday (Pudding Pantry, Book 2) written by Caroline Roberts and published by HarperCollins UK. This book was released on 2019-10-31 with total page 432 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This Christmas, home is where the heart is . . .
Download or read book Class written by Paul Fussell and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 1992 with total page 212 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This book describes the living-room artifacts, clothing styles, and intellectual proclivities of American classes from top to bottom.
Download or read book A Fatal Grace written by Louise Penny and published by Minotaur Books. This book was released on 2007-05-15 with total page 356 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Read the series that inspired Three Pines on Prime Video. From the #1 New York Times bestseller Louise Penny comes the second Armand Gamache mystery set in the stunning countryside of Quebec. Winner of the 2007 Agatha Award for Best Novel! Welcome to winter in Three Pines, a picturesque village in Quebec, where the villagers are preparing for a traditional country Christmas, and someone is preparing for murder. No one liked CC de Poitiers. Not her quiet husband, not her spineless lover, not her pathetic daughter—and certainly none of the residents of Three Pines. CC de Poitiers managed to alienate everyone, right up until the moment of her death. When Chief Inspector Armand Gamache, of the Sûreté du Quebec, is called to investigate, he quickly realizes he's dealing with someone quite extraordinary. CC de Poitiers was electrocuted in the middle of a frozen lake, in front of the entire village, as she watched the annual curling tournament. And yet no one saw anything. Who could have been insane enough to try such a macabre method of murder—or brilliant enough to succeed? With his trademark compassion and courage, Gamache digs beneath the idyllic surface of village life to find the dangerous secrets long buried there. For a Quebec winter is not only staggeringly beautiful but deadly, and the people of Three Pines know better than to reveal too much of themselves. But other dangers are becoming clear to Gamache. As a bitter wind blows into the village, something even more chilling is coming for Gamache himself.
Download or read book Small Mouth Sounds written by Bess Wohl and published by Abrams. This book was released on 2019-10-22 with total page 75 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “Leaves you moved, refreshed and, yes, maybe even enlightened.” —New York Times (Critic’s Pick) In the overwhelming quiet of the woods, six runaways from city life embark on a silent retreat. As these strangers confront internal demons both profound and absurd, their vows of silence collide with the achingly human need to connect. Filled with awkward and insightful humor, Bess Wohl’s beguiling and compassionate new play brilliantly captures the unique eloquence of a silent retreat and asks how we address life’s biggest questions when words fail us. A major hit of the 2015–16 Off Broadway season with two sold out extended runs, Small Mouth Sounds is “wry and observant . . . long on emotions and short on words” (Daily News).
Download or read book Harper's Weekly written by John Bonner and published by . This book was released on 1857 with total page 868 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Book Synopsis Our Tragic Universe by : Scarlett Thomas
Download or read book Our Tragic Universe written by Scarlett Thomas and published by HMH. This book was released on 2010-09-01 with total page 388 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This “delightfully whimsical novel riffs on the premise that ordinary lives stubbornly resist the tidy order that a fiction narrative might impose on them” (Publishers Weekly). Can a story save your life? Meg Carpenter is broke. Her novel is years overdue. Her cell phone is out of minutes. And her moody boyfriend’s only contribution to the household is his sour attitude. So she jumps at the chance to review a pseudoscientific book that promises life everlasting. But who wants to live forever? Consulting cosmology and physics, tarot cards, koans (and riddles and jokes), new-age theories of everything, narrative theory, Nietzsche, Baudrillard, and knitting patterns, Meg wends her way through Our Tragic Universe, asking this and many other questions. Does she believe in fairies? In magic? Is she a superbeing? Is she living a storyless story? And what’s the connection between her off-hand suggestion to push a car into a river, a ship in a bottle, a mysterious beast loose on the moor, and the controversial author of The Science of Living Forever? Smart, entrancing, and boiling over with Thomas’s trademark big ideas, Our Tragic Universe is a book about how relationships are created and destroyed, how we can rewrite our futures (if not our histories), and how stories just might save our lives.
