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The Kobold Wizards Dildo Of Enlightenment 2 An Adventure For 3 6 Players Levels 2 5
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Book Synopsis The Kobold Wizard's Dildo of Enlightenment +2 (An Adventure for 3-6 Players, Levels 2-5) by : Carlton Mellick Iii
Download or read book The Kobold Wizard's Dildo of Enlightenment +2 (An Adventure for 3-6 Players, Levels 2-5) written by Carlton Mellick Iii and published by . This book was released on 2010-06 with total page 232 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Are you ready to play some Dungeons and Fucking Dragons? The Kobold Wizard's Dildo of Enlightenment +2 is an absurd comedy about a group of adventurers (elf, halfling, bard, dwarf, assassin, thief) going through an existential crisis after having discovered that they are really just pre-rolled characters living inside of a classic AD&D role playing game. While exploring the ruins of Tardis Keep, these 6 characters must deal with their inept Dungeon Master's retarded imagination and resist their horny teenaged players' commands to have sex with everything in sight. Featuring: punk rock elf chicks, death metal orcs, porn-addicted beholders, a goblin/halfling love affair, a gnoll orgy, and a magical dildo that holds the secrets of the universe.
Book Synopsis The Cannibals of Candyland by : Carlton Mellick Iii
Download or read book The Cannibals of Candyland written by Carlton Mellick Iii and published by . This book was released on 2009-08 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A man tries to prove that are cannibalistic candy people.
Book Synopsis Razor Wire Pubic Hair by : Carlton Mellick III
Download or read book Razor Wire Pubic Hair written by Carlton Mellick III and published by . This book was released on 2012-06 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A surreal sexual nightmare by cult bizarro author Carlton Mellick III. In a dark future where males have become extinct, humans are forced to breed with factory-manufactured living fuck-toys that possess an abundance of both male and female sex organs. One such creature is adopted by a warrior dominatrix named Celsia, who is trying to have a baby. But once she takes her new merchandise home, things don't quite go as planned. Wild tribes of rapists, women with multiple vaginas covering their bodies, sex tournaments, erotic mutilation, and a giant vagina possessing the secrets of the universe, this is one ugly perverted hell of a world. Told in Mellick's early schizophrenic prose style, Razor Wire Pubic Hair is like postmodern minimalistic art mixed with Japanese "guro" porn.
Book Synopsis Every Time We Meet at the Dairy Queen, Your Whole Fucking Face Explodes by : Carlton Mellick III
Download or read book Every Time We Meet at the Dairy Queen, Your Whole Fucking Face Explodes written by Carlton Mellick III and published by . This book was released on 2016-04-06 with total page 122 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Known for his cute, disturbing, and utterly absurd novels, cult author Carlton Mellick III returns with a tale of childhood love and spontaneous face explosions. Ethan is in love with the weird girl in school. The one with the twitchy eyes and spiders in her hair. The one who can't sit still for even a minute and speaks in an odd squeaky voice. The one they call "Spiderweb." Although she scares all the other kids in school, Ethan thinks Spiderweb is the cutest, sweetest, most perfect girl in the world. But there's a problem. Whenever they go on a date at the Dairy Queen, her whole fucking face explodes. He's not sure why it happens. She just gets so excited that pressure builds under her skin. Then her face bursts, spraying meat and gore across the room, her eyeballs and lips landing in his strawberry sundae. At first, Ethan believes he can deal with his girlfriend's face-exploding condition. But the more he gets to know her, the weirder her condition turns out to be. And as their relationship gets serious, Ethan realizes that the only way to make it work is to become just as strange as she is. From the award-winning author of "Sweet Story" and "The Haunted Vagina," comes a twisted love story that is as creepy as it is heart-warming.
Book Synopsis Words to Rhyme with by : Willard R. Espy
Download or read book Words to Rhyme with written by Willard R. Espy and published by Checkmark Books. This book was released on 2001 with total page 692 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: An easy-to-use dictionary of over 80,000 rhyming words.
Book Synopsis The House of the Red Doors by : James A. Pozenel, Jr.
Download or read book The House of the Red Doors written by James A. Pozenel, Jr. and published by . This book was released on 2024-12-03 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Generations ago the House of the Red Doors visited your village. Now, so many years hence, could it be passing this way again? As the story goes, its mistress, Jassafae, still untouched by time's ravages, is a powerful being of unknown origin. Through her, fates are altered and wishes granted, but only to those brave enough to cross her threshold. You toil unceasingly, suffer much, and to what end? Unrequited dreams and the hope of an early grave? You resolve to enter and change your destiny.
Download or read book Hauntings written by Ellen and published by Tachyon Publications. This book was released on 2013-04-01 with total page 433 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This fiendish anthology, complied by the horror genre’s most acclaimed editor, drags you into the twisted minds of modern literary masters at their fiendish best. Visionary storytellers fill this collection of tales lyrical and strange, monstrous and exhilarating, horrific and transformative. *A sweetly vengeful voice on the radio calls a young soldier out to join a phantom patrol. *A hotel maid who threw her newborn child from a fourth-story window lingers in an interminable state. *An intern in a paranormal research facility delves deeply into the unexplained deaths of two staff members. *A serial killer plans his ultimate artistic achievement: the unveiling of an extremely special instrument in a very private concert. At once familiar and shocking, these riveting stories will haunt you long after you put down your book and turn out the light.
Book Synopsis Gimme Some Sugar by : Sawyer Bennett
Download or read book Gimme Some Sugar written by Sawyer Bennett and published by Big Dog Books, LLC. This book was released on 2019-06-11 with total page 84 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Larkin Mancinkus prides herself on making the town of Whynot, North Carolina just a little sweeter. As owner of Sweet Cakes Bakery, Larkin gets all the town gossip – the sugar, the spice, and the everything not so nice. So when she finds herself on the tip of everyone’s tongue thanks to an encounter with a mysterious and handsome stranger, she learns the true meaning of ‘if you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.’ Deacon Locke has spent his life traveling the world with no particular destination in mind. But when he rolls into Whynot on his Harley, he just knows there is something different about this town. What he doesn’t know is that out of all the places he’s traveled and all the people he’s met, the gorgeous bakery owner might just entice him to put down some solid roots. Come on down to see what’s cookin’ between Larkin and Deacon!
Book Synopsis Bronze Age Mindset by : Bronze Pervert
Download or read book Bronze Age Mindset written by Bronze Pervert and published by . This book was released on 2018-06-06 with total page 198 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The Atlantic named this author as possibly Steve Bannon's contact in the White House (Rosie Gray, The Atlantic Feb 10 2017: " 'Think you should speak directly to my WH cutout / cell leader,' Yarvin said in an email. 'I've never met him and don't know his identity, we just DM on Twitter. He's said to be 'very close' to Bannon...Goal is to intimidate Congress with pure masculine show of youth, energy. Trump is said to know, will coordinate with powerful EOs..."); and a recent Vox article (Tara Isabella Burton, Vox June 1 2018) claimed that he is the "text" to Jordan Peterson's "subtext," and a "distilled" form of Peterson. Distilled means purer: yes, so why not read and understand the purer version? T. I. Burton also adds in this article that this author BAP is a kind of priest-king to thousands on Twitter and outside and is possibly leading a spiritual reawakening.Some say that this book, found in a safebox in the port area of Kowloon, was dictated, because Bronze Age Pervert refuses to learn what he calls "the low and plebeian art of writing." It isn't known how this book was transcribed. The contents are pure dynamite. He explains that you live in ant farm. That you are observed by the lords of lies, ritually probed. Ancient man had something you have lost: confidence in his instincts and strength, knowledge in his blood. BAP shows how the Bronze Age mindset can set you free from this Iron Prison and help you embark on the path of power. He talks about life, biology, hormones. He gives many examples from history, both ancient and modern. He shows the secrets of the detrimental robots, how they hide and fabricate. He helps you escape gynocracy and ascend to fresh mountain air.The pricing, he insisted on against all advice. It refers to the lucky 969 Movement of Burma, led by the noble monk Wirathu.Praise be to the Pervert. Praise be to his teaching of peace.Be careful.
Download or read book Apeshit written by Carlton Mellick Iii and published by . This book was released on 2013-10 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Friday the 13th meets Visitor Q. Apeshit is Mellick's love letter to the great and terrible B-horror movie genre. Six trendy teenagers (three cheerleaders and three football players) go to an isolated cabin in the mountains for a weekend of drinking, partying, and crazy sex, only to find themselves in the middle of a life and death struggle against a horribly mutated psychotic freak that just won't stay dead. Mellick parodies this horror clich and twists it into something deeper and stranger. It is the literary equivalent of a grindhouse film. It is a splatter punk's wet dream. It is perhaps one of the most fucked up books ever written. If you are a fan of Takashi Miike, Evil Dead, early Peter Jackson, or Eurotrash horror, then you must read this book.
Download or read book Whargoul written by Dave Brockie and published by Deadite Press. This book was released on 2010-12 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: I Destroyed Your Life I Raped Your Wife I Am the Fucking Whargoul From the killing grounds of Stalingrad to the death camps of the holocaust. From torture chambers in Iraq to race riots in the United States, the Whargoul was there - killing and raping. It is a beast born in bullets and shrapnel, feeding off of pain, misery, and hard drugs. Cursed to wander the Earth without the hope of death, it is reborn again and again to spread the gospel of hate, abuse, and genocide. But what if it's not the only monster out there? What if there's something worse? From Dave Brockie, the twisted genius behind GWAR, comes a novel about the darkest days of the twentieth century. The modern world is dying and Brockie is here to put a bullet between its eyes and violate the corpse. This is all-out fucking war!
Book Synopsis Fantastic Orgy by : Carlton Mellick Iii
Download or read book Fantastic Orgy written by Carlton Mellick Iii and published by . This book was released on 2011-09 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Shark Sex, mutant cats, and strange sexually transmitted diseases. Over the past few decades, sexually transmitted diseases have evolved in unusual ways. Herpes, AIDS, Gonorrhea; these are all STDs of the past. These days, sexually transmitted diseases are more extreme and bizarre. Not exactly diseases anymore, they are more like sexually transmitted body modifications. There's an STD that changes your hair color, an STD that causes your toes to grow larger, one causes you to grow extra breasts on your body, another causes your skin to grow long metal spikes, and there's an especially annoying STD that causes you to ejaculate miniature eyeballs. Tonight is Share Your STD Night at the Demon Seed Swingers Club. Although most members of society fear the idea of contracting these diseases, there are some underground deviants who embrace them. They believe the diseases make them strange, unique, and beautiful. So they come together once a month to trade their wonderful STDs with each other in a surreal, fantastical orgy. However, tonight will not be like other nights. There's a new disease spreading through the sex club, a disease that causes people to become rabid bloodthirsty killing machines. As the infected rampage through the Demon Seed, the survivors realize there's only one thing they can do to survive the night: turn their grotesque STDs into deadly super weapons. Also featuring the short stories: "Candy-Coated" - A buff dude with a lollipop for a head has a hard time picking up the laydaaays due to all of the bearded truckers who keep trying to lick his head. "Ear Cat" - A Kitty of the Month Club selection gone horribly, horribly wrong. "City Hobgoblins" - A member of a punk rock band falls in love with a shark-like creature. (a prequel to the cult novel Satan Burger) "Porno in August" - A group of porn actors find themselves floating in the middle of the ocean, unable to remember who they are or why they are there. (Chosen for The Year's Best Fantasy and Horror)
Book Synopsis Satan Burger (15th Anniversary Edition) by : Carlton Mellick III
Download or read book Satan Burger (15th Anniversary Edition) written by Carlton Mellick III and published by Eraserhead Press. This book was released on 2016-07-01 with total page 296 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When Satan Burger was first being passed around among teenage punks and fans of weird art and film, there was nothing else like it. A book of rebellious spirit that simplistically captured the postmodern malaise of a culture obsessed with consumerism. It quickly gained an underground following, was transcribed by fans and bootlegged online, was translated into Russian and made its way around the world attracting the attention of readers bored with typical mainstream fare. Combining a satirical wit and style on par with legendary humorists such as Kurt Vonnegut and Russell Edson with the crazy punk ethos of cult film directors such as Terry Gilliam, David Lynch, and Takashi Miike, this was a book overflowing with so many new ideas and absurd philosophies that it not only launched the career of underground author Carlton Mellick III, but inspired an entire literary movement. For the fifteenth anniversary of the release of this Bizarro Fiction classic, Eraserhead Press is thrilled to present this special hardcover edition, featuring an introduction by splatterpunk legend John Skipp, illustrations by Ryan Ward, and a new preface by the author. Satan Burger explores a new kind of apocalypse. Not an apocalypse caused by disease or nuclear war, but an apocalypse of boredom. A plague of monotony has spread across the countryside, sucking all passion and inspiration out of everyone over the age of twenty-five, leaving only the disenfranchised youth to fend for themselves in a world crumbling around them. Featuring a narrator who sees his body from a third-person perspective, a man whose flesh is dead but his body parts are alive and running amok, an overweight messiah, the personal life of the Grim Reaper, a race of women who feed on male orgasms, and a motley group of squatter punks that team up with the devil to find their place in a world that doesn't want them anymore.
Download or read book Melodious Accord written by Alice Parker and published by . This book was released on 1991 with total page 100 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Book Synopsis Satan Burger (20th Anniversary Edition) by : Carlton Mellick, III
Download or read book Satan Burger (20th Anniversary Edition) written by Carlton Mellick, III and published by . This book was released on 2021-11-25 with total page 308 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Satan Burger explores a new kind of apocalypse. Not an apocalypse caused by disease or nuclear war, but an apocalypse of boredom. A plague of monotony has spread across the countryside, sucking all passion and out of everyone over the age of twenty-five, leaving only the disenfranchised youth to fend for themselves in a world crumbling around them. Featuring a narrator who sees his body from a third-person perspective, a man whose flesh is dead but his body are alive and amok, an overweight messiah, the personal life of the Grim Reaper, a race of women who feed on male orgasms, and a group of squatter punks that team up with the devil to find their place in a world that doesn't want them anymore.
Book Synopsis Full Metal Octopus by : Carlton Mellick, III
Download or read book Full Metal Octopus written by Carlton Mellick, III and published by . This book was released on 2021-07-20 with total page 216 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: For almost 20 years, Carlton Mellick III has been writing some of the strangest and most compelling novels the bizarro fiction genre has to offer. Described as one of the top 40 science-fiction writers under the age of 40 by The Guardian and "one of the most original novelists working today" by extreme horror legend Edward Lee, Mellick returns with an erotic urban fantasy crime novel about love and violence, sex and sexuality, oppression and overcoming impossible odds. Welcome to Grub Town, the most corrupt city in America. A place where gutter punk mermaids swim in sewage-filled canals, fairy prostitutes hang in birdcages on every street corner, and yakuza elves run everything behind the scenes. Eliot is the most beautiful fairy in all of the city with his dazzling emerald green butterfly wings that make everyone who sees them fall instantly in lust with him. But it's more of a curse than a blessing. Forced to hide his wings in public in order to avoid the constant sexual harassment, Eliot only finds solace when visiting his friends at the Snake Pit lamia strip club or getting tattooed by the dark and mysterious half-octopus woman named Oona. Oona is the best tattooist in the city, but she is a frightening woman three times Eliot's size with nine-foot tentacles that could choke a man to death in seconds. But despite this fact, Eliot is desperately in love with her. He's so infatuated with the octomaid that he gets new tattoos from her each and every week just to be closer to her, addicted to having her artwork permanently embedded into his skin. But when Eliot accidentally murders the only heir to the elf yakuza crime family in Oona's tattoo shop, they are forced to go on the run together, hoping to avoid the wrath of the most dangerous man in town. With everyone in the city out to get them, they can only rely on each other if they have any hope for survival. Like if Quentin Tarantino played with Monster High dolls, Full Metal Octopus is a return to Mellick's pulpy gritty bizarro style previously seen in The Cannibals of Candyland, Armadillo Fists, and Clownfellas.
Book Synopsis The Midnight Isles by : Greg A. Vaughan
Download or read book The Midnight Isles written by Greg A. Vaughan and published by . This book was released on 2014-01-21 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: An audience with the Crusader Queen leads the heroes through a mysterious portal to an otherworldly fortress that lies betwixt Golarion and the demonic Abyss. Bringing the fight for the Worldwound to its demonic source means dealing with the cultists of Deskari, demon prince of locusts, who infest the castle like a swarm of insects. Beyond the fortress lies the Abyssal realm of the Midnight Isles, lair of the succubus queen Nocticula, wherein lies the final secret of the powerful crystals empowering the Worldwound's demonic armies with mythic power. Can the heroes navigate the intrigues of three demon lords to strike a critical blow for the forces of good without losing their souls to darkness? The Midnight Isles is a Pathfinder Roleplaying Game adventure for 12th-level characters who have gained five mythic tiers. This volume also includes an extensive gazetteer of the Abyss, and an overview of the cult of Nocticula, along with a bestiary of several monsters and demon lords and part four of Robin D. Laws's Pathfinder Journal novella.
