Readers Digest Funny Family Jokes

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Readers Digest Funny Family Jokes

Author : Editors at Reader's Digest
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1621451909
Total Pages : 262 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (214 download)

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Book Synopsis Readers Digest Funny Family Jokes by : Editors at Reader's Digest

Download or read book Readers Digest Funny Family Jokes written by Editors at Reader's Digest and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2014-10-21 with total page 262 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In the Reader's Digest Funny Family Jokes we have compiled some of the funniest jokes, riddles, and one-liners that can be shared across generations, around the dinner table or the campfire. Truly, there's something for everyone from 9 to 99. "Knock! Knock! Who's there? Justin. Justin who? Justin the neighborhood and thought I'd come over." Reader's Digest has a long tradition of providing our readers with laughter through our many humor features. In the Reader's Digest Funny Family Jokes we have compiled some of the funniest jokes, riddles, and one-liners that can be shared across generations, around the dinner table or the campfire. Truly, there's something for everyone from 9 to 99. We hope you and your family will take the time to read, share and laugh together. Did you hear that NASA has launched several cows into orbit? It was the herd shot around the world.

Reader's Digest Fun Jokes for Funny Kids

Author : Reader's Digest
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1621454398
Total Pages : 128 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (214 download)

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Book Synopsis Reader's Digest Fun Jokes for Funny Kids by : Reader's Digest

Download or read book Reader's Digest Fun Jokes for Funny Kids written by Reader's Digest and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2019-07-02 with total page 128 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Where does a king keep his armies?... ...In his sleevies! Do you have a budding comedian on your hands? Loaded with Knock Knock jokes, riddles, one-liners, tongue twisters and puns, Fun Jokes for Funny Kids will give them hours of new material that will keep kids ages 6-12 rolling in laughter. Knock Knock jokes, riddles, tongue twisters and puns guaranteed to make your kids (and you) laugh out loud. Also includes illustrations and cartoons for extra giggles. Knock Knock. ...Who's there? Boo hoo! ...Boo hoo who? Aww, don't cry--it's just a joke! Knock Knock. ...Who's there? Olive. ...Olive who? Olive you and I don't care who knows it! What do you call an old snowman? ...Water! Which dinosaur knew the most words? ...The thesaurus! What do you call a fish with no eyes? ...fsh! What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator! How do turtles talk to each other? By using shell phones! Why are teddy bears never hungry? They are always stuffed! Why did the spider go to the computer? To check his web site. Where do polar bears vote? The North Poll.

Reader's Digest Laughter is the Best Medicine: All Time Favorites

Author : Reader's Digest
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1621455971
Total Pages : 328 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (214 download)

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Book Synopsis Reader's Digest Laughter is the Best Medicine: All Time Favorites by : Reader's Digest

Download or read book Reader's Digest Laughter is the Best Medicine: All Time Favorites written by Reader's Digest and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2022-04-05 with total page 328 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A hilarious collection of the funniest family-friendly jokes, quotes, stories, cartoons, and anecdotes from the past 100 years of Reader’s Digest magazine. A little chuckle every day will keep the doctor away. Editors have mined the Reader’s Digest archives to bring you Laughter Is the Best Medicine, All-Time Favorites, a collection of the most hilarious jokes and anecdotes we’ve come across over the years. As you turn the pages of our newest collection, you’ll realize once again that laughter is always the best medicine. If evolution really works, how come mothers have only two hands? –Milton Berle The game card said: “Name three wars.” My teenage daughter’s response: “Civil War, Revolutionary War, and Star Wars.” Keep your temper. Nobody wants it. –Dearborn Independent Check out this billion-dollar idea. A smoke detector that shuts off when you yell, “I’m just cooking!” Anthropologists have discovered a 50-million-year-old human skull with three perfectly preserved teeth intact. They're not sure, but they think it may be the remains of the very first hockey player. –Jay Leno This collection of laugh-out-loud, clean jokes, one-liners, and other lighthearted glimpses of life—drawn from Reader’s Digest magazine’s most popular humor columns—is sure to tickle the funny bone. Packed with cartoons, quotes, quips, and stories contributed by professional comedians, joke writers, and readers of the magazine, this side-splitting compilation pokes fun at the facts and foibles of daily routines, illustrating that life is often funnier than fiction.

Reader's Digest Fun Jokes for Funny Kids vol 3

Author : Reader's Digest
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1621455092
Total Pages : 90 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (214 download)

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Book Synopsis Reader's Digest Fun Jokes for Funny Kids vol 3 by : Reader's Digest

Download or read book Reader's Digest Fun Jokes for Funny Kids vol 3 written by Reader's Digest and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2020-09-22 with total page 90 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Loaded with knock knock jokes, riddles, one liners, tongue twisters and puns, Fun Jokes for Funny Kids Vol. 3 will give kids hours of new material. They will keep their friends and family rolling in laughter. Perfect for kids 6-12. Knock knock jokes, riddles, tongue twisters, one liners and puns gauranteed to make your kids -and you- laugh out loud. Icon's for Alexa's Favorites denote her hand picked, favorite jokes. Alexa, a real life 4th grader from new York who loves telling jokes, is our resident guest editor!

Reader's Digest Fun Jokes for Funny Kids Vol. 2

Author : Reader's Digest
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1621454525
Total Pages : 128 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (214 download)

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Book Synopsis Reader's Digest Fun Jokes for Funny Kids Vol. 2 by : Reader's Digest

Download or read book Reader's Digest Fun Jokes for Funny Kids Vol. 2 written by Reader's Digest and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2019-11-05 with total page 128 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Why aren't dogs good dancers?... ...They have two left feet! Do you have a budding comedian on your hands? Loaded with Knock Knock jokes, riddles, one-liners, tongue twisters and puns, Fun Jokes for Funny Kids Vol. 2 will give them hours of new material that will keep kids ages 6-12 rolling in laughter. Knock Knock jokes, riddles, tongue twisters, one-liners and puns guaranteed to make your kids (and you) laugh out loud. Plus--Icon for Alexa's Favorites. Alexa is a 2nd grader from New York who loves telling jokes. She has hand-picked her favorites from each chapter. Knock Knock. ...Who's there? Dozen. ...Dozen who? Dozen anyone want to let me in? Knock Knock. ...Who's there? Pecan. ...Pecan who? Pecan someone you're own size! Why don't mummies take time off? ...They are afraid to unwind! Did you hear about the crook that stole a calendar? ...He got 12 months! What would bears be without bees? ...Ears! What travels all over the world but stays in one corner? A Stamp! How do turtles talk to each other? By using shell phones! Why are ghosts bad liars? Because you can see right through them! Why did the spider go to the computer? To check his web site. Where do polar bears vote? The North Poll.

Humor in Uniform

Author : Editors of Reader's Digest
Publisher : Penguin
ISBN 13 : 1606525875
Total Pages : 158 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (65 download)

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Book Synopsis Humor in Uniform by : Editors of Reader's Digest

Download or read book Humor in Uniform written by Editors of Reader's Digest and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2008-05-01 with total page 158 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: More information to be announced soon on this forthcoming title from Penguin USA

Reader's Digest Dumb Dad Jokes

Author : Reader's Digest
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1621454452
Total Pages : 216 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (214 download)

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Book Synopsis Reader's Digest Dumb Dad Jokes by : Reader's Digest

Download or read book Reader's Digest Dumb Dad Jokes written by Reader's Digest and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2019-05-07 with total page 216 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Is your dad funny? Is he funny looking? Just kidding. In the Reader's Digest Dumb Dad Jokes we have compiled some of the funniest jokes, riddles, and one-liners that can be shared across generations, around the dinner table or the campfire. Truly, there's something for everyone from 6 to 106. "Knock! Knock! Who's there? Justin. Justin who? Justin the neighborhood and thought I'd come over." Most dads get their best material from their families. And that's what we have here: a collection of riddles, jokes, one-liners, hilarious anecdotes and pointed wit that see families for what they truly are--our chief source of amusement! Reader's Digest has a long tradition of providing our readers with laughter through our many columns in the magazine. This collection is pulled right from that humorous source. "Did you hear that NASA has launched several cows into orbit? It was the herd shot around the world!"

Now That's Funny!

Author : Andy Simmons
Publisher : Penguin
ISBN 13 : 1606525042
Total Pages : 220 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (65 download)

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Book Synopsis Now That's Funny! by : Andy Simmons

Download or read book Now That's Funny! written by Andy Simmons and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2012-08-16 with total page 220 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Every year, Reader’s Digest readers send in tens of thousands of jokes and funny anecdotes, in their quest for a $100 check and, as an extra benefit, eternal glory: to have their joke published in the world’s best-read magazine. One man is stopping them from their quest. Andy Simmons. It takes a sense of humor. And Andy certainly has that. Not only is he the arbiter of all things funny in Reader’s Digest; he is their Mark Twain, Bill Cosby, and even their David Sedaris. In other words, Andy is the guy Reader’s Digest turns to whenever they need a funny story all of America can appreciate. He’s perfect for the job. Andy takes great delight in the funny and oddball side of everyday life. In Now That’s Funny!, Andy presents his most popular, funniest writings on all things America, some exclusive and all-new, some taken from the award-winning pages of Reader’s Digest. You’ll discover the Andy that goes out and tries things. His first-person tales of taking dance lessons, participating in a Revolutionary War reenactment, and even taking stand-up comedy lessons are some of the funniest articles to ever appear in Reader’s Digest. Then you discover the Andy that observes America. His roundups of dumb criminals, crazy lawsuits, ridiculous excuses and out-of-touch scientific research will have you roaring with laughter -- and feeling much better about yourself. Then there’s Andy, the family man. You’ll laugh out loud as he goes in search of his inner macho --or for the next stop on his vacation, if only he can find the directions. And Andy’s observations on marriage and fatherhood are as accurate as they are funny. Finally, there’s Andy the jokester. Here are tales from the job of trying to think, act, and be funny every workday, no matter what the dog did this morning on the rug. Tales of his sit-downs with comic legends from Robin Williams to Woody Allen will have you in stitches. Andy also shares his favorite jokes -- many of them too edgy for printing in Reader’s Digest! Add it up, and it’s a book filled with hundreds of feel-good, laugh-out-loud moments about life in these United States -- exactly the type of reading we need today!

Laughter Totally is the Best Medicine

Author : Reader's Digest
Publisher : Trusted Media Brands
ISBN 13 : 9781621454069
Total Pages : 0 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (54 download)

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Book Synopsis Laughter Totally is the Best Medicine by : Reader's Digest

Download or read book Laughter Totally is the Best Medicine written by Reader's Digest and published by Trusted Media Brands. This book was released on 2018-10-16 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: More than 1,000 of the funniest, laugh-out-loud jokes, quips, quotes, anecdotes, and cartoons from Reader’s digest magazine—guaranteed to put laughter in your day. This collection of laugh-out-loud, clean jokes, one-liners, and other lighthearted glimpses of life—drawn from Reader’s Digest magazine’s most popular humor columns—is sure to tickle the funny bone. Packed with more than 1,000 jokes, anecdotes, funny things kids say, cartoons, quotes, and stories contributed by professional comedians, joke writers, and readers of the magazine, this side-splitting compilation pokes fun at the facts and foibles of daily routines, illustrating that life is often funnier than fiction. “If evolution really works, how come mothers have only two hands? – Milton Berle The game card said: “Name three wars.” My teenage daughter’s response: “Civil War, Revolutionary War, and Star Wars.” Why do Pilgrims’ pants fall down? Because their belts are on their hats! Check out this billion-dollar idea. A smoke detector that shuts off when you yell, “I’m just cooking!” Overheard in an office: Supervisor to team leader: "So our people aren’t astute enough to understand these comments on the document?" Leader: "What does astute mean?"

The Funniest Joke Book Ever!

Author : Editors of Portable Press
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1626866139
Total Pages : 90 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (268 download)

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Book Synopsis The Funniest Joke Book Ever! by : Editors of Portable Press

Download or read book The Funniest Joke Book Ever! written by Editors of Portable Press and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2016-05-01 with total page 90 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Over 500 giggles, groans, and belly laughs! Kids can’t resist sharing jokes (even you try to stop them), so they always need a fresh supply. We’ve stuffed the pages of this little joke book with the funniest jokes we could find. Old favorites, new favorites, and a few festering stinkers, all guaranteed to make kids laugh out loud. You’ll find Q&A jokes, knock-knock jokes, riddles, and one-liners. And, of course, we’ve included entire chapters of those all-time kid-pleasers: elephant jokes, pirate jokes, and space jokes. Here’s a sampling: What's black and white, black and white, black and white? A penguin rolling down a hill. Why don’t zombies eat clowns? They taste funny. Why did the hen scold her chicks? They were using fowl language. What kind of books do skunks read? Best-smellers! How does Darth Vader like his toast? On the dark side. . . . and many more!

The World's Greatest Collection of Clean Jokes

Author : Bob Phillips
Publisher : Harvest House Publishers
ISBN 13 : 0736948503
Total Pages : 113 pages
Book Rating : 4.7/5 (369 download)

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Book Synopsis The World's Greatest Collection of Clean Jokes by : Bob Phillips

Download or read book The World's Greatest Collection of Clean Jokes written by Bob Phillips and published by Harvest House Publishers. This book was released on 2013-03-01 with total page 113 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This top-selling collection of pure fun (more than 295,000 copies sold) is back with a fresh and lively new cover to reach more readers eager to laugh. Puns, one-liners, jester-worthy jokes, and quirky quips will amaze and astound friends and family. Giggles are guaranteed as readers enjoy the crazy conversations and hilarious observations— “Daddy, the teacher was reading the Bible to us—all about the children of Israel building the temple, the children of Israel crossing the Red Sea, the children of Israel making sacrifices. Didn’t the grownups do anything?” “You’re the laziest fellow I have seen. Don’t you do anything quickly?” “Yes, I get tired fast.” “I haven’t slept for days.” “How come?” “I only sleep at night!”

Laughter, The Best Medicine: Those Lovable Pets

Author : Editors of Reader's Digest
Publisher : Penguin
ISBN 13 : 1606524003
Total Pages : 226 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (65 download)

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Book Synopsis Laughter, The Best Medicine: Those Lovable Pets by : Editors of Reader's Digest

Download or read book Laughter, The Best Medicine: Those Lovable Pets written by Editors of Reader's Digest and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2012-02-02 with total page 226 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: People are funny, but so are the animals we love-and our day-to-day relationships with them can be even more entertaining. Dogs and cats obviously rule the comedic roost, but parrots, parakeets, and other talking birds are often an endless source of amusement as well. Even our connection to bunnies, hamsters, and the occasional white rat can evoke a good laugh. The 500-plus pet anecdotes, cartoons, and quotes in Laughter Is The Best Medicine: Those Lovable Pets have been collected from more than eight decades' worth of Reader's Digest magazines and are guaranteed to cheer up your day. You'll meet the woman whose dog trembled at the "Beware of Dog" sign in their front yard until she told him, "Relax! It's you!"; the vet whose advice to a woman whose cat had swallowed lots of unpopped popcorn was, "first, keep him out of the sun"; the mother-in-law who concealed her way-too-plump piglet's weight loss pills in ice cream; and much more. Our furry or fine feathered friends not only warm our hearts but also amuse us (and our joke writers, too) with their antics-one reason, no doubt, the market for this book is so vast: At the minimum, 40 percent of American households own at least one pet.

Jokes to Tell Your Dad

Author :
Publisher :
ISBN 13 : 9781567660982
Total Pages : 24 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (69 download)

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Book Synopsis Jokes to Tell Your Dad by :

Download or read book Jokes to Tell Your Dad written by and published by . This book was released on 1995-09 with total page 24 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Presents a collection of jokes featuring fathers and their offspring.

Laughter Really Is The Best Medicine

Author : Editors of Reader's Digest
Publisher : Penguin
ISBN 13 : 1606525859
Total Pages : 258 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (65 download)

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Book Synopsis Laughter Really Is The Best Medicine by : Editors of Reader's Digest

Download or read book Laughter Really Is The Best Medicine written by Editors of Reader's Digest and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2011-01-06 with total page 258 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This collection of laugh-out-loud jokes, one-liners, and other lighthearted glimpses of life-drawn from Reader's Digest magazine's most popular humor columns-is sure to tickle the funny bone. Packed with more than 1,000 jokes, anecdotes, cartoons, quotes, and stories contributed by professional comedians, joke writers, and readers of the magazine, this side-splitting compilation pokes fun at the facts and foibles of daily routines, illustrating that life is often funnier than fiction Did you hear about the Broadway actor who broke through the floorboards? He was just going through a stage What did the ill comic say in the hospital? "I'm here...all weak!" Charles Dickens walks into a bar and orders a martini. The bartender asks, "Olive or twist?" Posted in a dental office: "Be kind to your dentist. He has fillings too." "The main advantage of being famous is that when you bore people at dinner parties, they think it is their fault." -Henry Kissinger, Nobel Peace Prize, 1973 As Groucho Marx once said, "A laugh is like an aspirin, only it works twice as fast."

The Communicative Mind

Author : Line Brandt
Publisher : Cambridge Scholars Publishing
ISBN 13 : 1443853887
Total Pages : 640 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (438 download)

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Book Synopsis The Communicative Mind by : Line Brandt

Download or read book The Communicative Mind written by Line Brandt and published by Cambridge Scholars Publishing. This book was released on 2013-11-04 with total page 640 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Integrating research in linguistics, philosophy, semiotics, neurophenomenology, and literary studies, The Communicative Mind presents a thought-provoking and multifaceted investigation into linguistic meaning construction. It explores the various ways in which the intersubjectivity of communicating interactants manifests itself in language structure and use and argues for the indispensability of dialogue as a semantic resource in cognition. The view of the mind as highly conditioned by the domain of interpersonal communication is supported by an extensive range of empirical linguistic data from fiction, poetry and written and spoken everyday language, including rhetorically “creative” metaphors and metonymies. The author introduces Cognitive Linguistics to the notion of enunciation, which refers to the situated act of language use, and demonstrates the centrality of subjectivity and turn-taking interaction in natural semantics. The theoretical framework presented takes contextual relevance, viewpoint shifts, dynamicity, and the introduction into discourse of elements with no real-world counterparts (subjective motion, fictivity and other forms of non-actuality) to be vital components in the construction of meaning. The book engages the reader in critical discussions of cognitive-linguistic approaches to semantic construal and addresses the philosophical implications of the identified strengths and limitations. Among the theoretical advances in what Brandt refers to as the cognitive humanities is Fauconnier and Turner’s theory of conceptual integration of “mental spaces” which has proved widely influential in Cognitive Poetics and Linguistics, offering a philosophy of language bridging the gap between pragmatics and semantics. With its constructive criticism of the “general mechanism” hypothesis, according to which “blending” can explain everything from the origin of language to binding in perception, Brandt’s book brings the scope and applicability of Conceptual Integration Theory into the arena of scientific debate. The book contains five main chapters entitled Enunciation: Aspects of Subjectivity in Meaning Construction, The Subjective Conceptualizer: Non-actuality in Construal, Conceptual Integration in Semiotic Meaning Construction, Meaning Construction in Literary Text, and Effects of Poetic Enunciation: Seven Types of Iconicity.

Best of Reader's Digest Vol 2

Author : Reader's Digest
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1621455637
Total Pages : 421 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (214 download)

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Book Synopsis Best of Reader's Digest Vol 2 by : Reader's Digest

Download or read book Best of Reader's Digest Vol 2 written by Reader's Digest and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2021-06-08 with total page 421 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This collection showcases over 40 timeless stories that make you feel deeply and stick with you, along with cartoons, jokes, and readers' warm and funny true anecdotes. From everyday heroes to larger-than-life characters, small moments to historic events, the unforgettable stories in Reader's Digest come alive as never before in this keepsake book. Our editors have combed the archives for the narratives that thrill your senses, warm your heart, lift your spirits and leave you amazed or simply grateful for your connection with fellow humans, including: *Pilot Down: The Rescue of Scott O'Grandy--An Air Force captain policing a NATO "No Fly Zone" is struck by a missile and must use his ejection seat and parachute down into enemy territory. *The Pig That Changed My Life--The author agrees to take in what he's told is a mini pig. At first he hides the pig in his office, but his partner finds out and is upset. Nevertheless, they keep the pig and call it Esther. Esther grows up to be 650 pounds, sleeps with them along with 2 cats and 2 dogs, and wins the whole family over with her antics. The humans become vegan. *To My Daughter on Acquiring Her First Car--This is a lovely letter written by a father to his daughter as he gets her a car. It is a fond but serious plea that she not take lightly the responsibility of working this machine, that her and many others’ lives depend on her good judgement and care.

Laughter Still Is the Best Medicine

Author : Editors of Reader's Digest
Publisher : Trusted Media Brands
ISBN 13 : 9781621451372
Total Pages : 0 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (513 download)

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Book Synopsis Laughter Still Is the Best Medicine by : Editors of Reader's Digest

Download or read book Laughter Still Is the Best Medicine written by Editors of Reader's Digest and published by Trusted Media Brands. This book was released on 2014-01-02 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: More than 1,000 jokes, quotes, anecdotes, and cartoons from Reader’s digest magazine—guaranteed to put laughter in your day. This hilarious collection offers up some of the funniest moments that get us through our day, in the form of jokes, gags and cartoons that will have readers laughing out loud. Editors have mined the Reader’s Digest archives to bring readers Laughter the Best Medicine, All-Time Faves, a collection of the most hilarious jokes and anecdotes we’ve come across over the years. As you turn the pages of our newest collection, you’ll realize once again that laughter is always the best medicine. “Did you hear the one about the hitchhiker who never got anywhere? He’d get up early to avoid traffic.” --Chuck Welch, Houston, TX “When my husband was a home builder, his thumb ended up on the business end of a sledgehammer, and our three-year-old daughter, Kiana, was eager to tell the entire world. When her caregiver asked how the accident had happened, Kiana shook her head sadly and said, “You know, sometimes at work, my daddy just gets hammered.” --Stasia Uhlmann, Rocky Mountain House, Canada “After one of my students acted up, I took him to our school psychiatrist, who asked if he had ADHD. “No,” said the boy. “I just have a normal TV.” –Matthew Hughes, Fort Collins, CO “I’ve been told that when you meet the right person, you know immediately. How come when you meet the wrong person, it takes a year and a half?” --Comedian Phil Hanley