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Proud Father Of A Few Dumbass Kids Fathers Day Gift Lined Notebook
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Book Synopsis People I Want to Punch in the Throat by : Jen Mann
Download or read book People I Want to Punch in the Throat written by Jen Mann and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 2014-09-09 with total page 226 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: NATIONAL BESTSELLER • A debut collection of witty, biting essays laced with a surprising warmth, from Jen Mann, the writer behind the popular blog People I Want to Punch in the Throat People I want to punch in the throat: • anyone who feels the need to bling her washer and dryer • humblebraggers • people who treat their pets like children Jen Mann doesn’t have a filter, which sometimes gets her in trouble with her neighbors, her fellow PTA moms, and that one woman who tried to sell her sex toys at a home shopping party. Known for her hilariously acerbic observations on her blog, People I Want to Punch in the Throat, Mann now brings her sharp wit to bear on suburban life, marriage, and motherhood in this laugh-out-loud collection of essays. From the politics of joining a play group, to the thrill of mothers’ night out at the gun range, to the rewards of your most meaningful relationship (the one you have with your cleaning lady), nothing is sacred or off-limits. So the next time you find yourself wearing fuzzy bunny pajamas in the school carpool line or accidentally stuck at a co-worker’s swingers party, just think, What would Jen Mann do? Or better yet, buy her book. Praise for People I Want to Punch in the Throat “People I Want to Punch in the Throat is so good that it’ll make you want to adopt all the cats in the world. I’m not sure about the correlation, but it’s that good. It should come with a warning.”—Jenny Lawson, author of Let’s Pretend This Never Happened “Jen Mann has an amazing way of telling stories that will make you cringe and burst out laughing at the same time. From swinger parties to racist toddlers, she makes the suburbs unbelievably funny.”—Karen Alpert, author of I Heart My Little A-Holes “Jen Mann says the things we’re all too afraid to say. Her honest and hilarious writing style reminds me of David Sedaris and Tina Fey.”—Robin O’Bryant, author of Ketchup Is a Vegetable: And Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves “Jen Mann’s shrewd and unrelenting assault on the absurdity of suburban life is an honest peek into the occasional nightmare that is part of living the American dream. I love Jen. I wish she was my neighbor. It’s so refreshing to know that I’m not the only one who wants to punch almost everyone in the f***ing throat.”—Nicole Knepper, author of Moms Who Drink And Swear
Download or read book Paper Towns written by John Green and published by A&C Black. This book was released on 2013 with total page 321 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Quentin Jacobson has spent a lifetime loving Margo Roth Spiegelman from afar. So when she cracks open a window and climbs into his life - dressed like a ninja and summoning him for an ingenious campaign of revenge - he follows. After their all-nighter ends, Q arrives at school to discover that Margo has disappeared.
Book Synopsis Exceptionally Bad Dad Jokes by : Spiffy McChappy
Download or read book Exceptionally Bad Dad Jokes written by Spiffy McChappy and published by . This book was released on 2019-05-23 with total page 105 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The perfect gift for any Dad who loves telling jokes and making everyone laugh! (cough cough) A fantastic novelty gift for Fathers day, Birthdays & Christmas. Clean family friendly jokes. The first page has space for you to write a special message, an ideal alternative to a card. Please note this book is not a joke book about Dads. It is a joke book full of Dad jokes. A Dad joke can best be described as an embarrassingly bad joke. Often demonstrated during special occasions & makes the family wince. This book will be a jolly old laugh for your old chap, but not so much for you. Please also note: No refunds will be given due to any embarrassment this book will cause you or if your eyes get sore from constant eye rolls.
Download or read book Ask a Manager written by Alison Green and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 2018-05-01 with total page 306 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the creator of the popular website Ask a Manager and New York’s work-advice columnist comes a witty, practical guide to 200 difficult professional conversations—featuring all-new advice! There’s a reason Alison Green has been called “the Dear Abby of the work world.” Ten years as a workplace-advice columnist have taught her that people avoid awkward conversations in the office because they simply don’t know what to say. Thankfully, Green does—and in this incredibly helpful book, she tackles the tough discussions you may need to have during your career. You’ll learn what to say when • coworkers push their work on you—then take credit for it • you accidentally trash-talk someone in an email then hit “reply all” • you’re being micromanaged—or not being managed at all • you catch a colleague in a lie • your boss seems unhappy with your work • your cubemate’s loud speakerphone is making you homicidal • you got drunk at the holiday party Praise for Ask a Manager “A must-read for anyone who works . . . [Alison Green’s] advice boils down to the idea that you should be professional (even when others are not) and that communicating in a straightforward manner with candor and kindness will get you far, no matter where you work.”—Booklist (starred review) “The author’s friendly, warm, no-nonsense writing is a pleasure to read, and her advice can be widely applied to relationships in all areas of readers’ lives. Ideal for anyone new to the job market or new to management, or anyone hoping to improve their work experience.”—Library Journal (starred review) “I am a huge fan of Alison Green’s Ask a Manager column. This book is even better. It teaches us how to deal with many of the most vexing big and little problems in our workplaces—and to do so with grace, confidence, and a sense of humor.”—Robert Sutton, Stanford professor and author of The No Asshole Rule and The Asshole Survival Guide “Ask a Manager is the ultimate playbook for navigating the traditional workforce in a diplomatic but firm way.”—Erin Lowry, author of Broke Millennial: Stop Scraping By and Get Your Financial Life Together
Book Synopsis Cracked Up to Be by : Courtney Summers
Download or read book Cracked Up to Be written by Courtney Summers and published by St. Martin's Griffin. This book was released on 2008-12-23 with total page 225 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Classic Courtney Summers with a brand new look and exclusive bonus material! This ebook edition of Cracked Up to Be includes updated text, an afterword from the author and a discussion guide. The high price of perfection is one 'Perfect' Parker Fadley always believed she was willing to pay until the events of a party during junior year fractures the lives of her family and friends. Something terrible has happened and only Parker knows it's her fault. If being a perfect daughter, student, friend and girlfriend couldn't keep her from making an unforgivable mistake, Parker hopes becoming a perfect mess will at least keep her loved ones from discovering the truth. But when the arrival of a curious new student and the unexpected return of an old enemy threaten her tenuous grip on control, Parker must decide just how far she'll go to keep her secret from surfacing. Also available from Courtney Summers: I'M THE GIRL, the new "brutally captivating" (Publishers Weekly, starred review) queer thriller based loosely on The Epstein case.
Download or read book Your Child and Play written by and published by . This book was released on 1982 with total page 24 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Book Synopsis How to Traumatize Your Children by : Knock Knock
Download or read book How to Traumatize Your Children written by Knock Knock and published by . This book was released on 2007 with total page 200 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: While it's inevitable that all of us will traumatize our children, even the most committed parents have lacked guidance to do so deliberately and effectively. Whether you want to traumatise your kids the same way your parents used to or use a different approach, this book shows you the way.
Download or read book Feed written by M. T. Anderson and published by Candlewick Press. This book was released on 2010-05-11 with total page 311 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Identity crises, consumerism, and star-crossed teenage love in a futuristic society where people connect to the Internet via feeds implanted in their brains. Winner of the LA Times Book Prize. For Titus and his friends, it started out like any ordinary trip to the moon - a chance to party during spring break and play around with some stupid low-grav at the Ricochet Lounge. But that was before the crazy hacker caused all their feeds to malfunction, sending them to the hospital to lie around with nothing inside their heads for days. And it was before Titus met Violet, a beautiful, brainy teenage girl who knows something about what it’s like to live without the feed-and about resisting its omnipresent ability to categorize human thoughts and desires. Following in the footsteps of George Orwell, Anthony Burgess, and Kurt Vonnegut, Jr., M. T. Anderson has created a brave new world - and a hilarious new lingo - sure to appeal to anyone who appreciates smart satire, futuristic fiction laced with humor, or any story featuring skin lesions as a fashion statement.
Book Synopsis Life Among the Savages by : Shirley Jackson
Download or read book Life Among the Savages written by Shirley Jackson and published by McClelland & Stewart. This book was released on 2020-05-05 with total page 167 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In a hilariously charming domestic memoir, America’s celebrated master of terror turns to a different kind of fright: raising children In her celebrated fiction, Shirley Jackson explored the darkness lurking beneath the surface of small-town America. But in Life Among the Savages, she takes on the lighter side of small-town life. In this witty and warm memoir of her family’s life in rural Vermont, she delightfully exposes a domestic side in cheerful contrast to her quietly terrifying fiction. With a novelist’s gift for character, an unfailing maternal instinct, and her signature humor, Jackson turns everyday family experiences into brilliant adventures. Penguin Random House Canada is proud to bring you classic works of literature in e-book form, with the highest quality production values. Find more today and rediscover books you never knew you loved.
Download or read book Red Rising written by Pierce Brown and published by Del Rey. This book was released on 2014-01-28 with total page 414 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • Pierce Brown’s relentlessly entertaining debut channels the excitement of The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins and Ender’s Game by Orson Scott Card. “Red Rising ascends above a crowded dystopian field.”—USA Today ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR—Entertainment Weekly, BuzzFeed, Shelf Awareness “I live for the dream that my children will be born free,” she says. “That they will be what they like. That they will own the land their father gave them.” “I live for you,” I say sadly. Eo kisses my cheek. “Then you must live for more.” Darrow is a Red, a member of the lowest caste in the color-coded society of the future. Like his fellow Reds, he works all day, believing that he and his people are making the surface of Mars livable for future generations. Yet he toils willingly, trusting that his blood and sweat will one day result in a better world for his children. But Darrow and his kind have been betrayed. Soon he discovers that humanity reached the surface generations ago. Vast cities and lush wilds spread across the planet. Darrow—and Reds like him—are nothing more than slaves to a decadent ruling class. Inspired by a longing for justice, and driven by the memory of lost love, Darrow sacrifices everything to infiltrate the legendary Institute, a proving ground for the dominant Gold caste, where the next generation of humanity’s overlords struggle for power. He will be forced to compete for his life and the very future of civilization against the best and most brutal of Society’s ruling class. There, he will stop at nothing to bring down his enemies . . . even if it means he has to become one of them to do so. Praise for Red Rising “[A] spectacular adventure . . . one heart-pounding ride . . . Pierce Brown’s dizzyingly good debut novel evokes The Hunger Games, Lord of the Flies, and Ender’s Game. . . . [Red Rising] has everything it needs to become meteoric.”—Entertainment Weekly “Ender, Katniss, and now Darrow.”—Scott Sigler “Red Rising is a sophisticated vision. . . . Brown will find a devoted audience.”—Richmond Times-Dispatch Don’t miss any of Pierce Brown’s Red Rising Saga: RED RISING • GOLDEN SON • MORNING STAR • IRON GOLD • DARK AGE • LIGHT BRINGER
Book Synopsis The Android's Dream by : John Scalzi
Download or read book The Android's Dream written by John Scalzi and published by Tor Books. This book was released on 2007-04-01 with total page 408 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From New York Times bestseller and Hugo Award-winner John Scalzi, a wild-and-woolly caper novel of interstellar diplomacy A human diplomat creates an interstellar incident when he kills an alien diplomat in a most . . . unusual . . . way. To avoid war, Earth's government must find an equally unusual object: a type of sheep ("The Android's Dream"), used in the alien race's coronation ceremony. To find the sheep, the government turns to Harry Creek, ex-cop, war hero and hacker extraordinare, who, with the help of a childhood friend turned artificial intelligence, scours the earth looking for the rare creature. But there are others with plans for the sheep as well. Mercenaries employed by the military. Adherents of a secret religion based on the writings of a 21st century SF author. And alien races, eager to start a revolution on their home world and a war on Earth. To keep our planet from being enslaved, Harry will have to pull off a grand diplomatic coup, a gambit that will take him from the halls of power to the lava-strewn battlefields of alien worlds. There's only one chance to get it right, to save the life of the sheep—and to protect the future of humanity. Other Tor Books The Android’s Dream Agent to the Stars Your Hate Mail Will Be Graded Fuzzy Nation Redshirts 1. Lock In 2. Head On The Interdepency Sequence 1. The Collapsing Empire 2. The Consuming Fire Old Man's War Series 1. Old Man’s War 2. The Ghost Brigades 3. The Last Colony 4. Zoe’s Tale 5. The Human Division 6. The End of All Things At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.
Book Synopsis John Dies at the End by : Jason Pargin
Download or read book John Dies at the End written by Jason Pargin and published by Macmillan. This book was released on 2009-09-29 with total page 479 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: John Dies at the End is a genre-bending, humorous account of two college drop-outs inadvertently charged with saving their small town--and the world--from a host of supernatural and paranormal invasions. Now a Major Motion Picture. "[Pargin] is like a mash-up of Douglas Adams and Stephen King... 'page-turner' is an understatement." —Don Coscarelli, director, Phantasm I-V, Bubba Ho-tep STOP. You should not have touched this flyer with your bare hands. NO, don't put it down. It's too late. They're watching you. My name is David. My best friend is John. Those names are fake. You might want to change yours. You may not want to know about the things you'll read on these pages, about the sauce, about Korrok, about the invasion, and the future. But it's too late. You touched the book. You're in the game. You're under the eye. The only defense is knowledge. You need to read this book, to the end. Even the part with the bratwurst. Why? You just have to trust me. The important thing is this: The sauce is a drug, and it gives users a window into another dimension. John and I never had the chance to say no. You still do. I'm sorry to have involved you in this, I really am. But as you read about these terrible events and the very dark epoch the world is about to enter as a result, it is crucial you keep one thing in mind: None of this was my fault.
Book Synopsis Full Grown People by : Jennifer Niesslein
Download or read book Full Grown People written by Jennifer Niesslein and published by . This book was released on 2014 with total page 230 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: An anthology of thirty essays from the site fullgrownpeople.com.
Book Synopsis Cashing in on the American Dream by : Paul Terhorst
Download or read book Cashing in on the American Dream written by Paul Terhorst and published by Bantam. This book was released on 1988 with total page 248 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A brilliant and practical five year plan for all who dream of retiring while they're young and healthy enough to enjoy it. Provides clear advice on how to overcome the personal, financial and psychological obstacles.
Book Synopsis Romancing the Dark in the City of Light by : Ann Jacobus
Download or read book Romancing the Dark in the City of Light written by Ann Jacobus and published by Macmillan. This book was released on 2015-10-06 with total page 285 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A troubled teen, living in Paris, is torn between two boys, one of whom encourages her to embrace life, while the other—dark, dangerous, and attractive—urges her to embrace her fatal flaws.
Book Synopsis Smokepit Fairytales by : Tripp Ainsworth
Download or read book Smokepit Fairytales written by Tripp Ainsworth and published by Createspace Independent Publishing Platform. This book was released on 2016-11-04 with total page 328 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: An adventure tale for our times, the author combines real world events and supernatural elements in the style of a classical epic to tell a sometimes snarky, sometimes uproarious, and very poignant modern tale. Meet Hank Allensworth and Wilson Evans in a modern reflection of the Epic of Gilgamesh. An epic bromance between a Marine and his corpsman running around Oceanside, California . Degenerate Lance Corporals who have recently returned from Afghanistan, spending most of their time drunk at The Purple Church. One night while they're out drinking they are called back to base and the battalion is put on stand by because during the conflict with ISIS, the Islamic Republic of Iran decided to end the proxy war and get involved themselves. Soon after, Hank and Doc go with the regiment to keep the Iranians from crossing the Euphrates. The war kicks off and the Marines push across Iraq and into Iran. Hank and Doc both are wounded and sent home. The rest of the story they deal with survivor's guilt, alcoholism, PTSD, covering up for a murder, and trying to manage deteriorating love lives. I don't know if I could say there's any deeper meaning than gratuitous sex and violence, but I can guarantee you that if you've spent more than three days in an infantry battalion you will love this book.
Book Synopsis Daddy Flies by : Brye Butler Steeves
Download or read book Daddy Flies written by Brye Butler Steeves and published by CreateSpace. This book was released on 2015-09-16 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Daddy Flies" is a children's book for 2-5 year olds about a smart girl named Katie, who uses her little-kid logic to figure out what her dad does at work. Is he a bird? Is he a bug? Follow along with Katie to discover how her dad gets up in the sky. This book is for military families and anyone who ever wondered about flying!
