Intimate Creativity

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Publisher : Univ of Wisconsin Press
ISBN 13 : 0299180530
Total Pages : 268 pages
Book Rating : 4.2/5 (991 download)

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Book Synopsis Intimate Creativity by : Irving Sarnoff

Download or read book Intimate Creativity written by Irving Sarnoff and published by Univ of Wisconsin Press. This book was released on 2002-11-05 with total page 268 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Integrating the psychology of love and creativity, this pioneering book explores both how a couple’s involvement as lovers influences their creative collaboration and how working together affects their relationship. Representing a variety of genres—painting, sculpture, photography, and installation art—the celebrated couples profiled here include, among others, Christo and Jeanne-Claude, Elizabeth Diller and Ricardo Scofidio, and Kristin Jones and Andrew Ginzel. Intrigued by this process of "intimate creativity," psychologists Irving and Suzanne Sarnoff (themselves partners in love and work) decided to conduct in-depth interviews with partners in visual art because they defy the supremely individualistic tradition of their field. Whatever their age or sexual orientation, these artist-couples combine their talents to form a collective identity as a professional team. Passionately intense about their shared commitment, they communicate endlessly to resolve conflicts and reach consensus. Providing mutual validation and support, they increase their productivity and the quality of their work; they minimize their fear and frustration and enhance their pleasure in being together. The authors also draw on historical and contemporary literature about similar couples, ranging from Jean Arp and Sophie Taeuber to Gilbert and George to Claes Oldenburg and Coosje van Bruggen. Stimulating and engaging, this book highlights the features of a unique collaborative process, considers the connection between creativity and sexuality, and suggests possibilities for any couple to expand their intimacy.

Wired for Love

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Publisher : New Harbinger Publications
ISBN 13 : 1648482988
Total Pages : 332 pages
Book Rating : 4.6/5 (484 download)

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Book Synopsis Wired for Love by : Stan Tatkin

Download or read book Wired for Love written by Stan Tatkin and published by New Harbinger Publications. This book was released on 2024-06-01 with total page 332 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Invaluable for so many partners looking to reconnect and grow closer together." —Gwyneth Paltrow, founder and CEO of goop "Stan Tatkin can be entirely followed into the towering infernos of our most painful relationship challenges." —Alanis Morissette, artist, activist, and wholeness advocate The complete “insider’s guide” to understanding your partner’s brain, sparking lasting connection, and enjoying a romantic relationship built on love and trust—now with more than 170,000 copies sold. “What the heck is my partner thinking?” “Why do they always react like this?” “How can we get back that connection we had in the beginning?” If you’ve ever asked yourself these questions, you aren’t alone, and it doesn’t mean that your relationship is doomed. Every person is wired for love differently—with different habits, needs, and reactions to conflict. The good news is that most people’s minds work in predictable ways and respond well to security, attachment, and routines, making it possible to neurologically prime the brain for greater love and connection and fewer conflicts. This go-to guide will show you how. Drawn from neuroscience, attachment theory, and emotion regulation, this highly anticipated second edition of Wired for Love presents cutting-edge research on how and why love lasts, and offers ten guiding principles that can improve any relationship. This fully revised and updated edition also includes new guidance on how to manage disagreements, as well as new exercises to help you create a sense of safety and security, establish healthy conflict ground rules, and deal with the threat of the third—any outside source which threatens the harmony in your relationship, including in-laws, alcohol, children, and affairs. You’ll find proven-effective strategies to help you strengthen your relationship by: Creating and maintaining a safe “couple bubble” Using morning and evening routines to stay connected Learning how to see your partner’s point of view Meeting each other halfway in a fight Becoming the expert on what makes your partner feel loved By using simple gestures and words, you’ll learn to put out emotional fires and help your partner feel appreciated and loved. You’ll also discover how to move past a “warring brain” mentality and toward a more cooperative “loving brain.” Most importantly, you’ll gain a better understanding of the complex dynamics at work behind love and trust in intimate relationships. While there’s no doubt that love is an inexact science, if you understand how you and your partner are wired differently, you can overcome your differences, and create a lasting intimate connection.

Intimate Partners

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Author :
Publisher : Ballantine Books
ISBN 13 : 0307775038
Total Pages : 480 pages
Book Rating : 4.3/5 (77 download)

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Book Synopsis Intimate Partners by : Maggie Scarf

Download or read book Intimate Partners written by Maggie Scarf and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 2010-12-15 with total page 480 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “Anyone involved in, embarking on, or yearning for, an intimate relationship should buy, borrow or steal Intimate Partners.” –New Woman What goes on in our intimate attachments? What patterns of relationships do couples tend to follow, and why? The bonds we create affect every aspect of our lives, and yet our grasp of them is limited by our emotional reactions and learned responses. Now, in Intimate Partners, bestselling author Maggie Scarf gives us the classic book on marriage–on how love relationships are formed and how they change over the course of the marital cycle. Here you’ll discover • how to understand one’s inherited emotional history–and how fits with a partner’s • the fascinating ways in which power and control, and intimacy and autonomy exert strong effects upon the kind of partnership two people create • surprising observations on the role of sex and the impact of children on marriage • why change can be experienced as a form of betrayal–and how to ensure that a relationship matures with, and is not impeded by, each individual’s growth • simple exercises that couples can do to resolve tensions and change the nature of the world they share • verbal and physical techniques to cope with sexual difficulties and enliven a couple’s connection during sex • straightforward methods for how to engage in healthy–not dysfunctional–quarrels Intimate Partners is a book that changes not only how we view love relationships, but also how we live them. “Every marriage contains a story, and it begins long before the wedding, Maggie Scarf tells us in her ambitious, thought-provoking . . . ultimately compelling study. . . . Read it and feel consoled.” –USA Today “Listen to Maggie Scarf . . . and you’ll come away thinking that yes, marriage can be tough, living long-term with another person is one of the greatest challenges there is, but it’s well worth the effort.” –Chicago Tribune “Provocative . . . Scarf writes lucidly and convincingly.” –The Washington Post Book World

The Five Love Languages

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Author :
Publisher : Moody Publishers
ISBN 13 : 1575678853
Total Pages : 209 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (756 download)

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Book Synopsis The Five Love Languages by : Gary Chapman

Download or read book The Five Love Languages written by Gary Chapman and published by Moody Publishers. This book was released on 2009-12-17 with total page 209 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Marriage should be based on love, right? But does it seem as though you and your spouse are speaking two different languages? #1 New York Times bestselling author Dr. Gary Chapman guides couples in identifying, understanding, and speaking their spouse's primary love language-quality time, words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service, or physical touch. By learning the five love languages, you and your spouse will discover your unique love languages and learn practical steps in truly loving each other. Chapters are categorized by love language for easy reference, and each one ends with simple steps to express a specific language to your spouse and guide your marriage in the right direction. A newly designed love languages assessment will help you understand and strengthen your relationship. You can build a lasting, loving marriage together. Gary Chapman hosts a nationally syndicated daily radio program called A Love Language Minute that can be heard on more than 150 radio stations as well as the weekly syndicated program Building Relationships with Gary Chapman, which can both be heard on fivelovelanguages.com. The Five Love Languages is a consistent New York Times bestseller - with over 5 million copies sold and translated into 38 languages. This book is a sales phenomenon, with each year outselling the prior for 16 years running!

The State of Affairs

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Publisher : HarperCollins
ISBN 13 : 0062322605
Total Pages : 321 pages
Book Rating : 4.0/5 (623 download)

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Book Synopsis The State of Affairs by : Esther Perel

Download or read book The State of Affairs written by Esther Perel and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2017-10-10 with total page 321 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "A fresh look at infidelity, broadening the focus from the havoc it wreaks within a committed relationship to consider also why people do it, what it means to them, and why breaking up is the expected response to duplicity — but not necessarily the wisest one.” — LA Review of Books From iconic couples’ therapist and bestselling author of Mating in Captivity comes a provocative and controversial look at infidelity with practical, honest, and empathetic advice for how to move beyond it. An affair: it can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet, this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. What are we to make of this time-honored taboo—universally forbidden yet universally practiced? Why do people cheat—even those in happy marriages? Why does an affair hurt so much? When we say infidelity, what exactly do we mean? Do our romantic expectations of marriage set us up for betrayal? Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Can an affair ever help a marriage? Perel weaves real-life case stories with incisive psychological and cultural analysis in this fast-paced and compelling book. For the past ten years, Perel has traveled the globe and worked with hundreds of couples who have grappled with infidelity. Betrayal hurts, she writes, but it can be healed. An affair can even be the doorway to a new marriage—with the same person. With the right approach, couples can grow and learn from these tumultuous experiences, together or apart. Affairs, she argues, have a lot to teach us about modern relationships—what we expect, what we think we want, and what we feel entitled to. They offer a unique window into our personal and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. Through examining illicit love from multiple angles, Perel invites readers into an honest, enlightened, and entertaining exploration of modern marriage in its many variations. Fiercely intelligent, The State of Affairs provides a daring framework for understanding the intricacies of love and desire. As Perel observes, “Love is messy; infidelity more so. But it is also a window, like no other, into the crevices of the human heart.”

Partners in Life and Love

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Publisher : Saint Pauls/Alba House
ISBN 13 : 9780818909344
Total Pages : 0 pages
Book Rating : 4.9/5 (93 download)

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Book Synopsis Partners in Life and Love by : Joseph R. Giandurco

Download or read book Partners in Life and Love written by Joseph R. Giandurco and published by Saint Pauls/Alba House. This book was released on 2002-06 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This booklet is designed to give couples an intro to the Church's teaching on marriage based on the new Catechism, & to help them prepare their wedding liturgy.

Partners in Love

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Publisher : Ipso Books
ISBN 13 : 1504059565
Total Pages : 192 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (4 download)

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Book Synopsis Partners in Love by : Jean Saunders

Download or read book Partners in Love written by Jean Saunders and published by Ipso Books. This book was released on 2019-01-31 with total page 192 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “A fun summer read” from the author of The Bannister Girls, shortlisted for the Romantic Novel of the Year award (Holly Kinsella, bestselling author). When a handsome stranger walks into Robin Pollard’s favorite secluded beach cove, he changes not only the landscape of her Cornish home, but the trajectory of her life. As her father enters into a business partnership with slick property developer Luke Burgess to sell off the wild moors on his land, Robin’s life is turned upside down. Fiery and headstrong, Robin won’t let her childhood home go without a fight. To keep her enemy close, Robin takes a job with Luke, refusing to let him take advantage of her father. But it’s her soul at stake as she struggles to save the land she cherishes—and trust her feelings for the man who has stolen her heart . . .

The 5 Love Languages

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Publisher : Moody Publishers
ISBN 13 : 0802492401
Total Pages : 183 pages
Book Rating : 4.8/5 (24 download)

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Book Synopsis The 5 Love Languages by : Gary Chapman

Download or read book The 5 Love Languages written by Gary Chapman and published by Moody Publishers. This book was released on 2014-12-11 with total page 183 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Over 20 million copies sold! A perennial New York Times bestseller for over a decade! Falling in love is easy. Staying in love—that’s the challenge. How can you keep your relationship fresh and growing amid the demands, conflicts, and just plain boredom of everyday life? In the #1 New York Times international bestseller The 5 Love Languages®, you’ll discover the secret that has transformed millions of relationships worldwide. Whether your relationship is flourishing or failing, Dr. Gary Chapman’s proven approach to showing and receiving love will help you experience deeper and richer levels of intimacy with your partner—starting today. The 5 Love Languages® is as practical as it is insightful. Updated to reflect the complexities of relationships today, this new edition reveals intrinsic truths and applies relevant, actionable wisdom in ways that work. Includes the Love Language assessment so you can discover your love language and that of your loved one.

How to Fall in Love with Anyone

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Author :
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1501137468
Total Pages : 211 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (11 download)

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Book Synopsis How to Fall in Love with Anyone by : Mandy Len Catron

Download or read book How to Fall in Love with Anyone written by Mandy Len Catron and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2017-06-27 with total page 211 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “A beautifully written and well-researched cultural criticism as well as an honest memoir” (Los Angeles Review of Books) from the author of the popular New York Times essay, “To Fall in Love with Anyone, Do This,” explores the romantic myths we create and explains how they limit our ability to achieve and sustain intimacy. What really makes love last? Does love ever work the way we say it does in movies and books and Facebook posts? Or does obsessing over those love stories hurt our real-life relationships? When her parents divorced after a twenty-eight year marriage and her own ten-year relationship ended, those were the questions that Mandy Len Catron wanted to answer. In a series of candid, vulnerable, and wise essays that takes a closer look at what it means to love someone, be loved, and how we present our love to the world, “Catron melds science and emotion beautifully into a thoughtful and thought-provoking meditation” (Bookpage). She delves back to 1944, when her grandparents met in a coal mining town in Appalachia, to her own dating life as a professor in Vancouver. She uses biologists’ research into dopamine triggers to ask whether the need to love is an innate human drive. She uses literary theory to show why we prefer certain kinds of love stories. She urges us to question the unwritten scripts we follow in relationships and looks into where those scripts come from. And she tells the story of how she decided to test an experiment that she’d read about—where the goal was to create intimacy between strangers using a list of thirty-six questions—and ended up in the surreal situation of having millions of people following her brand-new relationship. “Perfect fodder for the romantic and the cynic in all of us” (Booklist), How to Fall in Love with Anyone flips the script on love. “Clear-eyed and full of heart, it is mandatory reading for anyone coping with—or curious about—the challenges of contemporary courtship” (The Toronto Star).

The All-or-Nothing Marriage

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Author :
Publisher : Penguin
ISBN 13 : 1101984341
Total Pages : 354 pages
Book Rating : 4.1/5 (19 download)

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Book Synopsis The All-or-Nothing Marriage by : Eli J. Finkel

Download or read book The All-or-Nothing Marriage written by Eli J. Finkel and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2019-01-08 with total page 354 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “After years of debate and inquiry, the key to a great marriage remained shrouded in mystery. Until now...”—Carol Dweck, author of Mindset: The New Psychology of Success Eli J. Finkel's insightful and ground-breaking investigation of marriage clearly shows that the best marriages today are better than the best marriages of earlier eras. Indeed, they are the best marriages the world has ever known. He presents his findings here for the first time in this lucid, inspiring guide to modern marital bliss. The All-or-Nothing Marriage reverse engineers fulfilling marriages—from the “traditional” to the utterly nontraditional—and shows how any marriage can be better. The primary function of marriage from 1620 to 1850 was food, shelter, and protection from violence; from 1850 to 1965, the purpose revolved around love and companionship. But today, a new kind of marriage has emerged, one oriented toward self-discover, self-esteem, and personal growth. Finkel combines cutting-edge scientific research with practical advice; he considers paths to better communication and responsiveness; he offers guidance on when to recalibrate our expectations; and he even introduces a set of must-try “lovehacks.” This is a book for the newlywed to the empty nester, for those thinking about getting married or remarried, and for anyone looking for illuminating advice that will make a real difference to getting the most out of marriage today.

Modern Romance

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Publisher : Penguin
ISBN 13 : 0143109251
Total Pages : 290 pages
Book Rating : 4.1/5 (431 download)

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Book Synopsis Modern Romance by : Aziz Ansari

Download or read book Modern Romance written by Aziz Ansari and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2016-06-14 with total page 290 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The #1 New York Times Bestseller “An engaging look at the often head-scratching, frequently infuriating mating behaviors that shape our love lives.” —Refinery 29 A hilarious, thoughtful, and in-depth exploration of the pleasures and perils of modern romance from Aziz Ansari, the star of Master of None and one of this generation’s sharpest comedic voices At some point, every one of us embarks on a journey to find love. We meet people, date, get into and out of relationships, all with the hope of finding someone with whom we share a deep connection. This seems standard now, but it’s wildly different from what people did even just decades ago. Single people today have more romantic options than at any point in human history. With technology, our abilities to connect with and sort through these options are staggering. So why are so many people frustrated? Some of our problems are unique to our time. “Why did this guy just text me an emoji of a pizza?” “Should I go out with this girl even though she listed Combos as one of her favorite snack foods? Combos?!” “My girlfriend just got a message from some dude named Nathan. Who’s Nathan? Did he just send her a photo of his penis? Should I check just to be sure?” But the transformation of our romantic lives can’t be explained by technology alone. In a short period of time, the whole culture of finding love has changed dramatically. A few decades ago, people would find a decent person who lived in their neighborhood. Their families would meet and, after deciding neither party seemed like a murderer, they would get married and soon have a kid, all by the time they were twenty-four. Today, people marry later than ever and spend years of their lives on a quest to find the perfect person, a soul mate. For years, Aziz Ansari has been aiming his comic insight at modern romance, but for Modern Romance, the book, he decided he needed to take things to another level. He teamed up with NYU sociologist Eric Klinenberg and designed a massive research project, including hundreds of interviews and focus groups conducted everywhere from Tokyo to Buenos Aires to Wichita. They analyzed behavioral data and surveys and created their own online research forum on Reddit, which drew thousands of messages. They enlisted the world’s leading social scientists, including Andrew Cherlin, Eli Finkel, Helen Fisher, Sheena Iyengar, Barry Schwartz, Sherry Turkle, and Robb Willer. The result is unlike any social science or humor book we’ve seen before. In Modern Romance, Ansari combines his irreverent humor with cutting-edge social science to give us an unforgettable tour of our new romantic world.

Fierce Marriage

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Author :
Publisher : Baker Books
ISBN 13 : 1493412779
Total Pages : 240 pages
Book Rating : 4.4/5 (934 download)

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Book Synopsis Fierce Marriage by : Ryan Frederick

Download or read book Fierce Marriage written by Ryan Frederick and published by Baker Books. This book was released on 2018-04-17 with total page 240 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Ryan and Selena Frederick were newlyweds when they landed in Switzerland to pursue Selena's dream of training horses. Neither of them knew at the time that Ryan was living out a death sentence brought on by a worsening genetic heart defect. Soon it became clear he needed major surgery that could either save his life--or result in his death on the operating table. The young couple prepared for the worst. When Ryan survived, they both realized that they still had a future together. But the near loss changed the way they saw all that would lie ahead. They would live and love fiercely, fighting for each other and for a Christ-centered marriage, every step of the way. Fierce Marriage is their story, but more than that, it is a call for married couples to put God first in their relationship, to measure everything they do and say to each other against what Christ did for them, and to see marriage not just as a relationship they should try to keep healthy but also as one worth fighting for in every situation. With the gospel as their foundation, Ryan and Selena offer hope and practical help for common struggles in marriage, including communication problems, sexual frustration, financial stress, family tension, screen-time disconnection, and unrealistic expectations.

Getting the Love You Want

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Author :
Publisher : Macmillan
ISBN 13 : 9780805068955
Total Pages : 340 pages
Book Rating : 4.0/5 (689 download)

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Book Synopsis Getting the Love You Want by : Harville Hendrix

Download or read book Getting the Love You Want written by Harville Hendrix and published by Macmillan. This book was released on 2001 with total page 340 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: I know of no better guide for couples who genuinely desire a maturing relationship.M. Scott Peck, author of The Road Less Traveled A remarkable bookthe most incisive and persuasive I have ever read on the knotty problems of marriage relationships. Ann Roberts, former president, Rockefeller Family Fund

Crazy Love

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Publisher : Impact Publishers
ISBN 13 : 9781886230804
Total Pages : 252 pages
Book Rating : 4.2/5 (38 download)

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Book Synopsis Crazy Love by : W. Brad Johnson

Download or read book Crazy Love written by W. Brad Johnson and published by Impact Publishers. This book was released on 2007 with total page 252 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The scenario is all too common: Girl meets guy (or Guy meets girl). Guy is smart, charming, and maybe even endearing. Girl falls in love. As the relationship progresses Guy's serious personality problems begin to surface. She gets longer and more vivid glimpses of habits and tendencies she didn't notice at first. With about 15% of the adult population suffering from one or more personality disorders -- that's over 16 million potential relationship partners, says the National Institutes of Health -- finding the right partner and maintaining a healthy love relationship is harder work than we thought! Crazy Love sheds light on the odd but surprisingly common disorders of personality so that readers can become better informed and more careful when entering or continuing a relationship. Johnson and Murray tell us why so many of us are attracted to personality disordered partners, and--most important--they offer strategies for detecting and avoiding such potential disasters. They also recognize the needs of readers who are already in committed relationships with personality-impaired partners, and offer hope in the form of healthy survival strategies and tips for making the relationship more livable.

How to Not Die Alone

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Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1982120649
Total Pages : 352 pages
Book Rating : 4.9/5 (821 download)

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Book Synopsis How to Not Die Alone by : Logan Ury

Download or read book How to Not Die Alone written by Logan Ury and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2021-02-02 with total page 352 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A “must-read” (The Washington Post) funny and practical guide to help you find, build, and keep the relationship of your dreams. Have you ever looked around and wondered, “Why has everyone found love except me?” You’re not the only one. Great relationships don’t just appear in our lives—they’re the culmination of a series of decisions, including whom to date, how to end it with the wrong person, and when to commit to the right one. But our brains often get in the way. We make poor decisions, which thwart us on our quest to find lasting love. Drawing from years of research, behavioral scientist turned dating coach Logan Ury reveals the hidden forces that cause those mistakes. But awareness on its own doesn’t lead to results. You have to actually change your behavior. Ury shows you how. This “simple-to-use guide” (Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone) focuses on a different decision in each chapter, incorporating insights from behavioral science, original research, and real-life stories. You’ll learn: -What’s holding you back in dating (and how to break the pattern) -What really matters in a long-term partner (and what really doesn’t) -How to overcome the perils of online dating (and make the apps work for you) -How to meet more people in real life (while doing activities you love) -How to make dates fun again (so they stop feeling like job interviews) -Why “the spark” is a myth (but you’ll find love anyway) This “data-driven” (Time), step-by-step guide to relationships, complete with hands-on exercises, is designed to transform your life. How to Not Die Alone will help you find, build, and keep the relationship of your dreams.

Why You Will Marry the Wrong Person

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Author :
Publisher : School of Life Press
ISBN 13 : 9780995573628
Total Pages : 0 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (736 download)

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Book Synopsis Why You Will Marry the Wrong Person by : The School of Life

Download or read book Why You Will Marry the Wrong Person written by The School of Life and published by School of Life Press. This book was released on 2017-04-27 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A collection of essays extended from The New York Times' most-read article of 2016. Anyone we might marry could, of course, be a little bit wrong for us. We don’t expect bliss every day. The fault isn’t entirely our own; it has to do with the devilish truth that anyone we’re liable to meet is going to be rather wrong, in some fascinating way or another, because this is simply what all humans happen to be – including, sadly, ourselves. This collection of essays proposes that we don’t need perfection to be happy. So long as we enter our relationships in the right spirit, we have every chance of coping well enough with, and even delighting in, the inevitable and distinctive wrongness that lies in ourselves and our beloveds.

Eight Dates

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Author :
Publisher : Workman Publishing
ISBN 13 : 1523504463
Total Pages : 241 pages
Book Rating : 4.5/5 (235 download)

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Book Synopsis Eight Dates by : John Gottman

Download or read book Eight Dates written by John Gottman and published by Workman Publishing. This book was released on 2019-02-05 with total page 241 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Whether you’re newly together and eager to make it work or a longtime couple looking to strengthen and deepen your bond, Eight Dates offers a program of how, why, and when to have eight basic conversations with your partner that can result in a lifetime of love. “Happily ever after” is not by chance, it’s by choice– the choice each person in a relationship makes to remain open, remain curious, and, most of all, to keep talking to one another. From award-winning marriage researcher and bestselling author Dr. John Gottman and fellow researcher Julie Gottman, Eight Dates offers an ingenious and simple-to-implement approach to effective relationship communication. Here are the subjects that every serious couple should discuss: Trust. Family. Sex and intimacy. Dealing with conflict. Work and money. Dreams, and more. And here is how to talk about them—how to broach subjects that are difficult or embarrassing, how to be brave enough to say what you really feel. There are also suggestions for where and when to go on each date—book your favorite romantic restaurant for the Sex & Intimacy conversation (and maybe go to a yoga or dance class beforehand). There are questionnaires, innovative exercises, real-life case studies, and skills to master, including the Four Skills of Intimate Conversation and the Art of Listening. Because making love last is not about having a certain feeling—it’s about both of you being active and involved.