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My Book Of All The Fucking Idiots I Want To Punch
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Book Synopsis People I Want to Punch in the Throat by : Jen Mann
Download or read book People I Want to Punch in the Throat written by Jen Mann and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 2014-09-09 with total page 226 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: NATIONAL BESTSELLER • A debut collection of witty, biting essays laced with a surprising warmth, from Jen Mann, the writer behind the popular blog People I Want to Punch in the Throat People I want to punch in the throat: • anyone who feels the need to bling her washer and dryer • humblebraggers • people who treat their pets like children Jen Mann doesn’t have a filter, which sometimes gets her in trouble with her neighbors, her fellow PTA moms, and that one woman who tried to sell her sex toys at a home shopping party. Known for her hilariously acerbic observations on her blog, People I Want to Punch in the Throat, Mann now brings her sharp wit to bear on suburban life, marriage, and motherhood in this laugh-out-loud collection of essays. From the politics of joining a play group, to the thrill of mothers’ night out at the gun range, to the rewards of your most meaningful relationship (the one you have with your cleaning lady), nothing is sacred or off-limits. So the next time you find yourself wearing fuzzy bunny pajamas in the school carpool line or accidentally stuck at a co-worker’s swingers party, just think, What would Jen Mann do? Or better yet, buy her book. Praise for People I Want to Punch in the Throat “People I Want to Punch in the Throat is so good that it’ll make you want to adopt all the cats in the world. I’m not sure about the correlation, but it’s that good. It should come with a warning.”—Jenny Lawson, author of Let’s Pretend This Never Happened “Jen Mann has an amazing way of telling stories that will make you cringe and burst out laughing at the same time. From swinger parties to racist toddlers, she makes the suburbs unbelievably funny.”—Karen Alpert, author of I Heart My Little A-Holes “Jen Mann says the things we’re all too afraid to say. Her honest and hilarious writing style reminds me of David Sedaris and Tina Fey.”—Robin O’Bryant, author of Ketchup Is a Vegetable: And Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves “Jen Mann’s shrewd and unrelenting assault on the absurdity of suburban life is an honest peek into the occasional nightmare that is part of living the American dream. I love Jen. I wish she was my neighbor. It’s so refreshing to know that I’m not the only one who wants to punch almost everyone in the f***ing throat.”—Nicole Knepper, author of Moms Who Drink And Swear
Download or read book As You Wish written by Cary Elwes and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2014-10-14 with total page 272 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From Cary Elwes, who played the iconic role of Westley in The Princess Bride, comes a first-person behind-the-scenes look at the making of the film.
Book Synopsis Dark Soul: Boulder Series (Book 4) by : Eve L. Mitchell
Download or read book Dark Soul: Boulder Series (Book 4) written by Eve L. Mitchell and published by Eve L. Mitchell . This book was released on with total page 436 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: There’s no rest for the wicked…or a single father. I should know. I’m getting a crash course in parenthood. Lela has left…and I don’t know where she is. I’m left picking up the pieces and learning to balance being a wicked alpha and a new father. In my line of work, weakness is a death sentence. The sharks are circling—and they’re out for blood. My blood. But if they think I’ve gone soft, they’re about to get a rude awakening. Because if there’s one thing I do know, it’s that this dark soul never loses. When an old adversary returns to collect a debt, bringing new temptations…will it cost me everything? Dark Soul is Book 4 in the Boulder Series, you MUST read Books 1-3 before reading this book. It is not a standalone book.
Download or read book 25 K Later written by and published by iUniverse. This book was released on with total page 89 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Book Synopsis Before We Were Strangers by : Renée Carlino
Download or read book Before We Were Strangers written by Renée Carlino and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2015-08-18 with total page 320 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the USA TODAY bestselling author of Sweet Thing and Nowhere But Here comes a love story about a Craigslist “missed connection” post that gives two people a second chance at love fifteen years after they were separated in New York City. To the Green-eyed Lovebird: We met fifteen years ago, almost to the day, when I moved my stuff into the NYU dorm room next to yours at Senior House. You called us fast friends. I like to think it was more. We lived on nothing but the excitement of finding ourselves through music (you were obsessed with Jeff Buckley), photography (I couldn’t stop taking pictures of you), hanging out in Washington Square Park, and all the weird things we did to make money. I learned more about myself that year than any other. Yet, somehow, it all fell apart. We lost touch the summer after graduation when I went to South America to work for National Geographic. When I came back, you were gone. A part of me still wonders if I pushed you too hard after the wedding… I didn’t see you again until a month ago. It was a Wednesday. You were rocking back on your heels, balancing on that thick yellow line that runs along the subway platform, waiting for the F train. I didn’t know it was you until it was too late, and then you were gone. Again. You said my name; I saw it on your lips. I tried to will the train to stop, just so I could say hello. After seeing you, all of the youthful feelings and memories came flooding back to me, and now I’ve spent the better part of a month wondering what your life is like. I might be totally out of my mind, but would you like to get a drink with me and catch up on the last decade and a half? M
Download or read book We All Looked Up written by Tommy Wallach and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2015-03-24 with total page 384 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The lives of four high school seniors intersect weeks before a meteor is set to pass through Earth's orbit, with a 66.6% chance of striking and destroying all life on the planet.
Book Synopsis If He Had Been with Me by : Laura Nowlin
Download or read book If He Had Been with Me written by Laura Nowlin and published by Sourcebooks, Inc.. This book was released on 2013-04-02 with total page 338 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: If he had been with me everything would have been different... I wasn't with Finn on that August night. But I should've been. It was raining, of course. And he and Sylvie were arguing as he drove down the slick road. No one ever says what they were arguing about. Other people think it's not important. They do not know there is another story. The story that lurks between the facts. What they do not know—the cause of the argument—is crucial. So let me tell you...
Download or read book Invasive written by Chuck Wendig and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2016-08-16 with total page 262 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A gripping sci-fi tech thriller, set in the eye-opening, paranoid world of the electrifying Zeroes—from the New York Times–bestselling author of Wanderers. Hannah Stander is a consultant for the FBI—a futurist who helps the Agency with cases that feature demonstrations of bleeding-edge technology. It’s her job to help them identify unforeseen threats: hackers, AIs, genetic modification, anything that in the wrong hands could harm the homeland. Hannah is in an airport, waiting to board a flight home to see her family, when she receives a call from Agent Hollis Copper. “I’ve got a cabin full of over a thousand dead bodies,” he tells her. Whether those bodies are all human, he doesn’t say. What Hannah finds is a horrifying murder that points to the impossible—someone weaponizing the natural world in a most unnatural way. Discovering who—and why—will take her on a terrifying chase from the Arizona deserts to the secret island laboratory of a billionaire inventor/philanthropist. Hannah knows there are a million ways the world can end, but she just might be facing one she could never have predicted—a new threat both ancient and cutting-edge that could wipe humanity off the earth. “Enthralling . . . Wendig does an impeccable job blending fact and fiction as he describes invasive species and insects being used as biological weapons.” —The Washington Post “Think Thomas Harris’ Will Graham and Clarice Starling rolled into one and pitched on the knife’s edge of a scenario that makes Jurassic Park look like a carnival ride. Another rip-roaring, deeply paranoid thriller about the reasons to fear the future.” —Kirkus Reviews (starred review)
Download or read book The Last Centurion written by John Ringo and published by Baen Publishing Enterprises. This book was released on 2008-08-01 with total page 556 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Centurions were the guardians of Rome. At the height of the Roman Republic there were over five thousand qualified Roman Centurions in the Legions. To be a Centurion required that, in a mostly illiterate society, one be able to read and write clearly, to be able to convey and create orders, to be capable of not only performing every skill of a Roman soldier but teach every skill of a Roman soldier. Becoming a Centurion required intense physical ability, courage beyond the norm, years of sacrifice and a total devotion to the philosophy which was Rome. When Rome fell to barbarian invaders, there were less than five hundred qualified Centurions. Not because Rome had fewer people but because it had fewer willing to make the sacrifices. And the last Centurions left their shields in the heather and took a barbarian bride . . . We are . . . The Last Centurions. At the publisher's request, this title is sold without DRM (Digital Rights Management).
Book Synopsis F*ck Feelings by : Michael Bennett, MD
Download or read book F*ck Feelings written by Michael Bennett, MD and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2015-09 with total page 384 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "The only self-help book you'll ever need, from a psychiatrist who will help you put aside your unrealistic wishes, stop trying to change things you can't change, and do the best with what you can control--the first steps to solving all of life's impossible problems"--
Download or read book The Little Book Of Life written by and published by alan macmillan orr. This book was released on with total page 1021 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Book Synopsis I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell by : Tucker Max
Download or read book I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell written by Tucker Max and published by Citadel . This book was released on 2012-03-01 with total page 537 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The “highly entertaining and thoroughly reprehensible” #1 New York Times bestseller—now with sixteen pages of photos and a new introduction (The New York Times). My name is Tucker Max, and I am an asshole. I get excessively drunk at inappropriate times, disregard social norms, indulge every whim, ignore the consequences of my actions, mock idiots and posers, sleep with more women than is safe or reasonable, and just generally act like a raging dickhead. But, I do contribute to humanity in one very important way: I share my adventures with the world. --from the Introduction Actual reader feedback: "I find it truly appalling that there are people in the world like you. You are a disgusting, vile, repulsive, repugnant, foul creature. Because of you, I don’t believe in God anymore. No just God would allow someone like you to exist." "I’ll stay with God as my lord, but you are my savior. I just finished reading your brilliant stories, and I laughed so hard I almost vomited. I want to bring that kind of joy to people. You’re an artist of the highest order and a true humanitarian to boot. I'm in both shock and awe at how much I want to be you."
Book Synopsis Capture Me (Capture Me: Book 1) by : Anna Zaires
Download or read book Capture Me (Capture Me: Book 1) written by Anna Zaires and published by Mozaika LLC. This book was released on 2015-12-08 with total page 181 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A new dark romance series from the New York Times bestselling author of Twist Me She fears him from the first moment she sees him. Yulia Tzakova is no stranger to dangerous men. She grew up with them. She survived them. But when she meets Lucas Kent, she knows the hard ex-soldier may be the most dangerous of them all. One night—that’s all it should be. A chance to make up for a failed assignment and get information on Kent’s arms dealer boss. When his plane goes down, it should be the end. Instead, it's just the beginning. He wants her from the first moment he sees her. Lucas Kent has always liked leggy blondes, and Yulia Tzakova is as beautiful as they come. The Russian interpreter might’ve tried to seduce his boss, but she ends up in Lucas’s bed—and he has every intention of seeing her there again. Then his plane goes down, and he learns the truth. She betrayed him. Now she will pay.
Book Synopsis I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die by : Sarah J. Robinson
Download or read book I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die written by Sarah J. Robinson and published by WaterBrook. This book was released on 2021-05-11 with total page 257 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A compassionate, shame-free guide for your darkest days “A one-of-a-kind book . . . to read for yourself or give to a struggling friend or loved one without the fear that depression and suicidal thoughts will be minimized, medicalized or over-spiritualized.”—Kay Warren, cofounder of Saddleback Church What happens when loving Jesus doesn’t cure you of depression, anxiety, or suicidal thoughts? You might be crushed by shame over your mental illness, only to be told by well-meaning Christians to “choose joy” and “pray more.” So you beg God to take away the pain, but nothing eases the ache inside. As darkness lingers and color drains from your world, you’re left wondering if God has abandoned you. You just want a way out. But there’s hope. In I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die, Sarah J. Robinson offers a healthy, practical, and shame-free guide for Christians struggling with mental illness. With unflinching honesty, Sarah shares her story of battling depression and fighting to stay alive despite toxic theology that made her afraid to seek help outside the church. Pairing her own story with scriptural insights, mental health research, and simple practices, Sarah helps you reconnect with the God who is present in our deepest anguish and discover that you are worth everything it takes to get better. Beautifully written and full of hard-won wisdom, I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die offers a path toward a rich, hope-filled life in Christ, even when healing doesn’t look like what you expect.
Book Synopsis I Was Born for This by : Alice Oseman
Download or read book I Was Born for This written by Alice Oseman and published by Scholastic Inc.. This book was released on 2022-10-18 with total page 307 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the bestselling creator of HEARTSTOPPER and LOVELESS, a deeply funny and deeply moving exploration of identity, friendship, and fame. For Angel Rahimi life is about one thing: The Ark -- a boy band that's taking the world by storm. Being part of The Ark's fandom has given her everything she loves -- her friend Juliet, her dreams, her place in the world. Her Muslim family doesn't understand the band's allure -- but Angel feels there are things about her they'll never understand. Jimmy Kaga-Ricci owes everything to The Ark. He's their frontman -- and playing in a band with his mates is all he ever dreamed of doing, even it only amplifies his anxiety. The fans are very accepting that he's trans -- but they also keep shipping with him with his longtime friend and bandmate, Rowan. But Jimmy and Rowan are just friends -- and Rowan has a secret girlfriend the fans can never know about. Dreams don't always turn out the way you think and when Jimmy and Angel are unexpectedly thrust together, they find out how strange and surprising facing up to reality can be. A funny, wise, and heartbreakingly true coming of age novel. I Was Born for This is a stunning reflection of modern teenage life, and the power of believing in something -- especially yourself.
Download or read book Saving Grace written by A.D. Justice and published by A.D. Justice. This book was released on with total page 265 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: I wanted to ask for a divorce. Instead of the fight I expected, she agreed—with a few stipulations, all of which revolved around our son leaving for college in the fall. Keeping those promises would be a challenge, no doubt. But all I had to do was uphold my end of the deal then walk away without a backward glance. Somewhere along the way, our charade became my reality. With each day that passes, I realize time is once again my enemy. I can’t lose her a second time. I’ll never walk away—she healed my soul. Saving Grace is now my only hope.
Download or read book Feed written by M. T. Anderson and published by Candlewick Press. This book was released on 2010-05-11 with total page 311 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Identity crises, consumerism, and star-crossed teenage love in a futuristic society where people connect to the Internet via feeds implanted in their brains. Winner of the LA Times Book Prize. For Titus and his friends, it started out like any ordinary trip to the moon - a chance to party during spring break and play around with some stupid low-grav at the Ricochet Lounge. But that was before the crazy hacker caused all their feeds to malfunction, sending them to the hospital to lie around with nothing inside their heads for days. And it was before Titus met Violet, a beautiful, brainy teenage girl who knows something about what it’s like to live without the feed-and about resisting its omnipresent ability to categorize human thoughts and desires. Following in the footsteps of George Orwell, Anthony Burgess, and Kurt Vonnegut, Jr., M. T. Anderson has created a brave new world - and a hilarious new lingo - sure to appeal to anyone who appreciates smart satire, futuristic fiction laced with humor, or any story featuring skin lesions as a fashion statement.
