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I Love You Beth Cooper
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Book Synopsis I Love You, Beth Cooper by : Larry Doyle
Download or read book I Love You, Beth Cooper written by Larry Doyle and published by Harper Collins. This book was released on 2009-10-13 with total page 306 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Denis Cooverman wanted to say something really important in his high school graduation speech. So, in front of his 512 classmates and their 3,000 relatives, he announced: "I love you, Beth Cooper." It would have been such a sweet, romantic moment. Except that Beth, the head cheerleader, has only the vaguest idea who Denis is. And Denis, the captain of the debate team, is so far out of her league he is barely even the same species. And then there's Kevin, Beth's remarkably large boyfriend, who's in town on furlough from the United States Army. Complications ensue.
Book Synopsis I Love You Beth Cooper by : Larry Doyle
Download or read book I Love You Beth Cooper written by Larry Doyle and published by Atlantic Books Ltd. This book was released on 2009-07-01 with total page 319 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The hilarious first novel from Simpsons writer Larry Doyle - and soon to be a major flim directed by Chris Columbus and starring Hayden Panettiere. Denis Cooverman wanted to say something really important in his high school graduation speech. So, in front of his 512 classmates and their 3,000 relatives, he announced: 'I love you, Beth Cooper.' It should have been such a sweet, romantic moment. Except that Beth, the head cheerleader, has only the vaguest idea who Denis is. And Denis, the captain of the debate team, is so not in her league that he is barely even of the same species. And then there's Kevin, Beth's remarkably large boyfriend, who's in town on leave from the US Army. Complications ensue...
Download or read book Deliriously Happy written by Larry Doyle and published by Harper Collins. This book was released on 2011-11-08 with total page 243 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Do you like dogs? Babies? Baby dogs? Have you ever eaten ice cream or had love troubles? Wish there were dirty parts in The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then this is the book for you. It’s all here: This impressively consecutive collection of funny writing by Larry Doyle, the winner of the 2008 Thurber Prize for American Humor, a former writer for The Simpsons, and the author of I Love You, Beth Cooper, brings together an astonishing range of subjects under the umbrella of hilarious—an umbrella that is your free gift if you order right now. Too late. But you can still take home this enormously entertaining read, featuring writing from the New Yorker, Esquire, and National Lampoon, along with never-before-seen pieces only available in this exclusive offer. Here’s what other happy customers had to say: “[Doyle] is, as his credits suggest, wickedly funny.” —New York Times Book Review “If Earth ever needs an Interplanetary Humor Ambassador, Larry Doyle’s the guy.”—Washington Post
Download or read book Go, Mutants! written by Larry Doyle and published by Harper Collins. This book was released on 2010-06-09 with total page 375 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Larry Doyle, the author of I Love You, Beth Cooper, returns with Go, Mutants!, a hilariously outrageous novel of teenage angst and restlessness, populated with heroes and villains straight out of the classic sci-fi and teen movies of the ‘50s and ‘60s. Soon to be a major motion picture from Universal Studios, Larry Doyle’s Go, Mutants! is the funniest, most original bit of genre-bending since Pride, Prejudice and Zombies. This story of alien high school rebels without a cause is sure to bring out the unabashed B-movie fan in everyone.
Download or read book Ghosts of Kansas written by Beth Cooper and published by Schiffer Publishing. This book was released on 2010 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Meet the ghosts of Kansas! Visit with a librarian who moves books at the State Capitol and ghosts that have been known to go home with patrons at River House. Learn about the Holton House spirit seen on a thermal imaging camera. Drink a cold brew with a ghost at Fat Matt's, the Twilighter, and PJ's Bar. Relive college days at the haunted fraternity in Manhattan, where a ghost rattles doorknobs during tours. Buy a hammer from Ghostly Grandpa at his hardware store in Shawnee. Kansas ghosts are here to thrill and entertain you!
Book Synopsis How Not to Kill Your Baby by : Jacob Sager Weinstein
Download or read book How Not to Kill Your Baby written by Jacob Sager Weinstein and published by Andrews McMeel Publishing. This book was released on 2012-03-20 with total page 137 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "This laugh-out-loud hilarious book is mandatory reading for parents, and should be taught in schools as the "cautionary tale" portion of Sex Ed. Run don't walk to buy it, and if you're a baby with lethal parents, crawl don't roll." --Rob Kutner (writer, The Daily Show, Conan, The Future According To Me) "Unlike babies themselves, copies of Jacob Sager Weinstein's book can be bought and sold on the open market. Buy two and bring joy and laughter to the lives of a copy-less couple." --Jose Arroyo (writer, Conan) "The "s-a-g-e" in Jacob's middle moniker indicates exactly that. He is a whimsically wise and hysterically funny fellow whom any child (or book buying adult) would be wise to listen to." --Dennis Miller "If you don't buy this book and then your baby dies, how are you going to feel? Pretty bad, I imagine." --Larry Doyle (writer, I Love You Beth Cooper; Go, Mutants!; The Simpsons) Have you ever read a parenting book that left you feeling inadequate and/or terrified? In other words, have you ever read any parenting book whatsoever? If so, you need How Not To Kill Your Baby, a hilarious parody of every fear-mongering, crazy-making pregnancy and parenting manual you've ever cringed over. Just consider the following advice: * "As you know if you have ever seen someone give birth in a movie or television show, all newborns emerge with adorable round faces, pudgy limbs, and twinkling eyes. If, by contrast, the nurse hands you a tiny, squawling creature with the face of an old man and skin covered in goo, hand it back immediately. There has clearly been some sort of mixup with a nearby ward for senile midgets." * "It's essential that you keep careful track of your baby's every bodily function. That way, when she is president of the United States and a paranoid-minded conspiracy movement springs up denying her eligibility for the position, you will have documentary proof that she did, in fact, poop on U.S. soil at 8:23AM on February 23." * "When choosing a nursery school, make sure to visit first, and ask the teachers about their educational philosophies. Then ask about their criminal records. If they insist they have none, you may need to keep asking, perhaps while shining a bright light in their face. Also, take their fingerprints, then follow them home from a discreet distance and go through their trash. Oh, and don't forget to thank them for their dedication to helping the young!" * "It is easy to adjust your parenting techniques as your children grow: simply do and say the exact same things, but raise your voice by one decibel for every year of your child's age." How Not To Kill Your Baby is printed on child-safe, 100% piranha-free paper, and bound without the use of exploding staples. You'll get no such promise from What To Expect When You're Expecting. How Not To Kill Your Baby is the book for you... unless you're some kind of baby-hating creep who wants to parent all wrong.
Download or read book Fierce Pajamas written by David Remnick and published by Modern Library. This book was released on 2002-10-15 with total page 527 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When Harold Ross founded The New Yorker in 1925, he called it a “comic weekly.” And although it has become much more than that, it has remained true in its irreverent heart to the founder’s description, publishing the most illustrious literary humorists in the modern era—among them Robert Benchley, Dorothy Parker, Groucho Marx, James Thurber, S. J. Perelman, Mike Nichols, Woody Allen, Calvin Trillin, Garrison Keillor, Ian Frazier, Roy Blount, Jr., Steve Martin, and Christopher Buckley. Fierce Pajamas is a treasury of laughter from the magazine W. H. Auden called the “best comic magazine in existence.”
Book Synopsis Carter Finally Gets It by : Brent Crawford
Download or read book Carter Finally Gets It written by Brent Crawford and published by Little, Brown Books for Young Readers. This book was released on 2010-03-21 with total page 300 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Meet Will Carter, but feel free to call him Carter. (Yes, he knows it's a lazy nickname, but he didn't have much say in the matter.) Here are five things you should know about him: 1. He has a stuttering problem, particularly around boobs and belly buttons. 2. He battles Attention Deficit Disorder every minute of every day unless he gets distracted. 3. He's a virgin, mostly because he's no good at talking to girls (see number 1). 4. He's about to start high school. 5. He's totally not ready. Join Carter for his freshman year, where he'll search for sex, love, and acceptance anywhere he can find it. In the process, he'll almost kill a trombone player, face off with his greatest nemesis, suffer a lot of blood loss, narrowly escape death, run from the cops (not once, but twice), get caught up in a messy love triangle, meet his match in the form of a curvy drill teamer, and surprise the hell out of everyone, including himself.
Book Synopsis I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die by : Sarah J. Robinson
Download or read book I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die written by Sarah J. Robinson and published by WaterBrook. This book was released on 2021-05-11 with total page 257 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A compassionate, shame-free guide for your darkest days “A one-of-a-kind book . . . to read for yourself or give to a struggling friend or loved one without the fear that depression and suicidal thoughts will be minimized, medicalized or over-spiritualized.”—Kay Warren, cofounder of Saddleback Church What happens when loving Jesus doesn’t cure you of depression, anxiety, or suicidal thoughts? You might be crushed by shame over your mental illness, only to be told by well-meaning Christians to “choose joy” and “pray more.” So you beg God to take away the pain, but nothing eases the ache inside. As darkness lingers and color drains from your world, you’re left wondering if God has abandoned you. You just want a way out. But there’s hope. In I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die, Sarah J. Robinson offers a healthy, practical, and shame-free guide for Christians struggling with mental illness. With unflinching honesty, Sarah shares her story of battling depression and fighting to stay alive despite toxic theology that made her afraid to seek help outside the church. Pairing her own story with scriptural insights, mental health research, and simple practices, Sarah helps you reconnect with the God who is present in our deepest anguish and discover that you are worth everything it takes to get better. Beautifully written and full of hard-won wisdom, I Love Jesus, But I Want to Die offers a path toward a rich, hope-filled life in Christ, even when healing doesn’t look like what you expect.
Download or read book Hello, Holland written by Beth Leipholtz and published by . This book was released on 2020-10-11 with total page 91 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Hi mama (or dad!). I've been where you are. The darkness, the unknowns, the fear, the uncertainty -- everything that accompanies a hearing loss diagnosis. You may feel all of these things at once. You may ebb and flow between them. Or you may not know what you feel at all. And that is okay. When you are told your child has significant hearing loss, there is no right reaction. Tears may flow, or they may refuse to come. Anger may boil over, or it may fester. Grief can pave the way, or it can be pushed aside. We all process serious, life-altering news differently. My own family received that news on October 18, 2019. In some ways, it feels like a lifetime ago. In others, the pain and emotions are still fresh. Time is funny that way. My goal in sharing my son Cooper's story -- our story, really -- is to show you that you are truly never alone. This journey to Holland (hang in there, I'll get to the relevancy of this) can feel like a lonely one at the beginning. But when you find acceptance, when you open your heart, there is so much beauty to be found along the way.
Download or read book Vanished written by E. E. Cooper and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2015-05-12 with total page 189 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Gone Girl meets Pretty Little Liars in the first book of this fast-paced psychological thriller series full of delicious twists and turns. Friendship. Obsession. Deception. Love. Kalah knows better than to fall for Beth Taylor . . . but that doesn't stop her from falling hard and falling fast, heart first into a sea of complications. Then Beth vanishes. She skips town on her eighteenth birthday, leaving behind a flurry of rumors and a string of broken hearts. Not even Beth's best friend, Britney, knows where she went. Beth didn't even tell Kalah good-bye. One of the rumors links Beth to Britney's boyfriend, and Kalah doesn't want to believe the betrayal. But Brit clearly believes it—and before Kalah can sort out the truth, Britney is dead. When Beth finally reaches out to Kalah in the wake of Brit's suicide, Kalah wants to trust what Beth tells her. But she's swiftly realizing that nothing here is as it seems. Kalah's caught in the middle of a deadly psychological game, and only she can untangle the deceptions and lies to reveal the unthinkable truth.
Download or read book To Sir, with Love written by Lauren Layne and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2021-06-29 with total page 288 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Love Is Blind meets You’ve Got Mail in this laugh-out-loud romantic comedy following two thirty-somethings who meet on a blind dating app—only to realize that their online chemistry is nothing compared to their offline rivalry. Perpetually cheerful and eager to please, Gracie Cooper strives to make the best out of every situation. So when her father dies just months after a lung cancer diagnosis, she sets aside her dreams of pursuing her passion for art to take over his Midtown Manhattan champagne shop. She soon finds out that the store’s profit margins are being squeezed perilously tight, and complicating matters further, a giant corporation headed by the impossibly handsome, but irritatingly arrogant Sebastian Andrews is proposing a buyout. But Gracie can’t bear the thought of throwing away her father’s dream like she did her own. Overwhelmed and not wanting to admit to her friends or family that she’s having second thoughts about the shop, Gracie seeks advice and solace from someone she’s never met—the faceless “Sir”, with whom she connected on a blind dating app where matches get to know each other through messages and common interests before exchanging real names or photos. But although Gracie finds herself slowly falling for Sir online, she has no idea she’s already met him in real life…and they can’t stand each other.
Download or read book The Beach Trap written by Ali Brady and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2022-06-14 with total page 385 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Two best friends torn apart by a life-altering secret. One summer to set the record straight. When twelve-year-olds Kat Steiner and Blake O’Neill meet at Camp Chickawah, they have an instant connection. But everything falls apart when they learn they’re not just best friends—they’re also half sisters. Confused and betrayed, the girls break off all contact. Fifteen years later, when their father dies suddenly, Kat and Blake discover he’s left them a joint inheritance: the family beach house in Destin, Florida. The two sisters are immediately at odds. Blake, who has recently been demoted from regular nanny to dog nanny, wants to sell the house, while social media influencer Kat is desperate to hold on to the place where she lived so many happy memories. Kat and Blake reluctantly join forces to renovate the dilapidated house, with the understanding that Kat will try to buy Blake out at the end of the summer. The women clash as Blake’s renovation plans conflict with Kat’s creative vision; meanwhile, each sister finds herself drawn into a summer romance. As the weeks pass, the two women realize the most difficult project they face this summer will be coming to grips with their shared past—and learning how to become sisters.
Book Synopsis Awake & Alive to Truth by : John L. Cooper
Download or read book Awake & Alive to Truth written by John L. Cooper and published by . This book was released on 2020-11-27 with total page pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Have you sensed it? Chaos. Violence. Confusion. Anxiety. How do we know what's true when there are so many differing voices telling us what to do? After traveling the world for 23 years in a rock band, John L. Cooper has noticed one consistent issue: people are desperately confused. Awake & Alive to Truth tackles the reigning philosophies of our day of post-modernism, relativism, and the popular view of the goodness of man and combats these viewpoints by standing on the absolute truth of the Word of God. Awake & Alive to Truth answers some of the most asked questions in modern culture. Go on a journey through some John Cooper's personal stories, the doctrine of original sin, the authority of Scripture, the danger of trusting your emotions, and end with the greatest news possible: God wants to rescue you from the chaos and the darkness and bring you into His glorious light.
Book Synopsis Mr Darcy Broke My Heart by : Beth Pattillo
Download or read book Mr Darcy Broke My Heart written by Beth Pattillo and published by . This book was released on 2010 with total page 273 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: As Claire Prescott reads the first draft of 'Pride and Prejudice', she uncovers a long-hidden secret about the iconic Darcy, aswell as a truth about Austen's own struggle to find the right hero for Elizabeth Bennet.
Download or read book Mission to America written by Walter Kirn and published by National Geographic Books. This book was released on 2006-10-10 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Mason LaVerle is a young man on a mission–a mission to save his people’s way of life. Mason was raised in a tiny, isolated Montanan sect, the church of the Aboriginal Fulfilled Apostles. But the Apostles face a dwindling membership, so Mason is sent on an outreach operation to bring back converts–specifically brides. As he discovers shopping malls, fast food, and faster women, the forces of faith and the forces of America collide, leading Mason to the brink of missionary madness.
Book Synopsis We Will Tell You Otherwise by : Beth Mayer
Download or read book We Will Tell You Otherwise written by Beth Mayer and published by . This book was released on 2019-08-20 with total page 140 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Fiction. "What does Beth Mayer's intimate collection of short stories want to tell us? That the dead have much to teach the living, that madness can point the way to clarity, that the burn of departing never cools, that inside abandonment can be redemption. Mayer's prose rattles like bones, proving that no matter how far you live in the margins, you can't escape the telling."--Desiree Cooper "Beth Mayer's stories unflinchingly explore the tough and the tender sides of family life as well as offering us a window into the lives of those we often prefer not to notice when we pass them in our neighborhoods. I was moved by the deep emotional truths in WE WILL TELL YOU OTHERWISE, and the slyly ironic and often sardonic wit of these stories kept me smiling all the way through. What a lovely collection of stories this is!"--David Haynes "The stories in Beth Mayer's WE WILL TELL YOU OTHERWISE are indelible treasures, full of poignancy and pathos. Mayer is the best kind of writer--one who doles out her wisdom with humor, who mines the intricacies of love, friendship, and family effortlessly."--John Jodzio
