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Dont Count Your Chicken Farts Before They Hatch
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Book Synopsis Don't Count Your Chicken Farts Before They Hatch by : Donald Rump
Download or read book Don't Count Your Chicken Farts Before They Hatch written by Donald Rump and published by Donald Rump. This book was released on 2018-07-04 with total page 34 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When Miles Puggsley spends his last dollar on a carton of empty eggs, he realizes he's reached rock bottom and the end is near. But there's a basement to the misery he now endures, especially for the once proud DMV specialist turned exorcist. Can a band of wild chicken farts change his fortune? No, probably not. Approximately 4,100 words.
Book Synopsis "The Farce of the Fart" and Other Ribaldries by : Jody Enders
Download or read book "The Farce of the Fart" and Other Ribaldries written by Jody Enders and published by University of Pennsylvania Press. This book was released on 2011-05-31 with total page 495 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Was there more to medieval and Renaissance comedy than Chaucer and Shakespeare? Bien sûr. For a real taste of saucy early European humor, one must cross the Channel to France. There, in the fifteenth and early sixteenth centuries, the sophisticated met the scatological in popular performances presented by roving troupes in public squares that skewered sex, politics, and religion. For centuries, the scripts for these outrageous, anonymously written shows were available only in French editions gathered from scattered print and manuscript sources. Now prize-winning theater historian Jody Enders brings twelve of the funniest of these farces to contemporary English-speaking audiences in "The Farce of the Fart" and Other Ribaldries. Enders's translation captures the full richness of the colorful characters, irreverent humor, and over-the-top plotlines, all in a refreshingly uncensored American vernacular. Those who have never heard the one about the Cobbler, the Monk, the Wife, and the Gatekeeper should prepare to be shocked and entertained. "The Farce of the Fart" and Other Ribaldries is populated by hilarious characters high and low. For medievalists, theater practitioners, and classic comedy lovers alike, Enders provides a wealth of information about the plays and their history. Helpful details abound for each play about plot, character development, sets, staging, costumes, and props. This performance-friendly collection offers in-depth guidance to actors, directors, dramaturges, teachers, and their students. "The Farce of the Fart" and Other Ribaldries puts fifteenth-century French farce in its rightful place alongside Chaucer, Shakespeare, commedia dell'arte, and Molière—not to mention Monty Python. Vive la Farce!
Book Synopsis A Happy Heart and One Slice Of Bread by : Arthur V. Dieli
Download or read book A Happy Heart and One Slice Of Bread written by Arthur V. Dieli and published by FriesenPress. This book was released on 2017-12-05 with total page 1985 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Sicilian proverbs are a pathway into the reality of Sicilian culture over the centuries. They are the voices of its people that ring true from generation to generation. The proverbs are an important sub-text of their conversation. Every segment of society is represented by the truth of the proverbs. The majority of the Sicilian proverbs in this collection were recorded by Dr. Giuseppe Pitrè (1841-1916) in four volumes of his twenty-five volume library of Sicilian folklore as he traveled the island tending to the sick in all walks of life. Tending the sick was Dr. Pitrè’s occupation, Sicilian folklore was Pitrè’s literary life. In his literary life he also edited The Archivio delle Tradition Popolari with his close friend and associate Salomone Marino. This English translation of his work makes the proverbs of the entire four volumes available to the English speaking world for the first time. The translation also includes about fifteen hundred Sicilian proverbs drawn from other collections.
Book Synopsis Four Stinky Stories Vol. 4 by : Donald Rump
Download or read book Four Stinky Stories Vol. 4 written by Donald Rump and published by Donald Rump. This book was released on 2020-02-21 with total page 85 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Can you believe it? Four more stinky stories have squeaked out, including these ghastly ghost turds: PUT ANOTHER FART IN THE JUKEBOX, BABY When Brad Blemmings meets his blind date at Fifty Something, a retro shake and burger joint, he's not sure what to expect. But the goth beauty Maimah is quite a handful, and then there's the matter of the farting jukebox in the corner... PEDO FLAMBÉ When an old man hobbles into the Palazzio and demands his favorite dish, the peculiar Pedo Flambé, the wait staff isn't sure what to make of it. "I'm sorry, sir, but we don't have such a thing on our menu." His baby-faced waiter Zach Spitz frowns. "You sure about that?" The old man slaps down a $100 bill. "Of course, sir. Right away, sir!" Zach's manager snatches up the bill and runs back to the kitchen. FART LOVER SUPREME Kimberly Grant is ruthless, and wants a taco. Thankfully, she's found a sucker to give it to her. Big time! DON'T COUNT YOUR CHICKEN FARTS BEFORE THEY HATCH When Miles Puggsley spends his last dollar on a carton of empty eggs, he realizes he's reached rock bottom and the end is near. But there's a basement to the misery he now endures, especially for the once proud DMV specialist turned exorcist. Can a band of wild chicken farts change his fortunes? No, probably not. BONUS: THE HAIRIEST BUTT The search for the hairiest butt on Venus leads to explosive results. Approximately 15,500 words.
Book Synopsis Speaking of Animals by : Robert Palmatier
Download or read book Speaking of Animals written by Robert Palmatier and published by Bloomsbury Publishing USA. This book was released on 1995-04-30 with total page 497 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: No other nonhuman source has served as the basis for more metaphors than animals. Speaking of Animals is a dictionary of animal metaphors that are current in American English. It is comprehensive, historical, and metaphor-based. Each entry refers to the other dictionaries that catalog that same metaphor, and the dates of first appearance in writing are supplied, where possible, for both the metaphor and the name of the source. The main text is organized alphabetically by metaphor rather than by animal or animal behavior; all the metaphors are classified according to their animal source in a list at the end of the book. An animal metaphor is a word, phrase, or sentence that expresses a resemblance or similarity between someone or something and a particular animal or animal class. True metaphors are single words, such as the noun tiger, the verb hog, and the adjective chicken. Phrasal metaphors combine true metaphors with other words, such as blind tiger, hog the road, and chicken colonel. Other animal metaphors take the form of similes, such as like rats leaving a sinking ship and prickly as a hedgehog. Still others take the form of proverbs, such as Don't count your chickens before they hatch and Let sleeping dogs lie. The horse is the animal most frequently referred to in metaphors, followed closely by the dog. The Bible is the most prolific literary source of animal metaphors, followed closely by Shakespeare.
Book Synopsis They Call Me Vlad - Episode 1: Return of the Blech by : Donald Rump
Download or read book They Call Me Vlad - Episode 1: Return of the Blech written by Donald Rump and published by Donald Rump. This book was released on 2023-12-18 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: VLAD WIECKOWSKY has never smelled worse! Fresh off a plane from Honolulu, which surprisingly didn't crash, it doesn't take long before trouble finds him. But that's nothing a few, nice, timely, juicy air biscuits can't fix. Or not... Approximately 3,000 words.
Book Synopsis Till Death Do Us Fart by : Donald Rump
Download or read book Till Death Do Us Fart written by Donald Rump and published by Donald Rump. This book was released on 2014-05-18 with total page 20 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Helen Hubbard's fears have finally been confirmed. During brunch one morning in her favorite restaurant, her husband Gary confesses to cheating on her, and is ready to leave at a moment's notice. When she pries deeper into the matter, she discovers more about his mysterious lover Muffy than she cares to know. “So you’re leaving me for a fart???” Helen exclaimed. For mature (and not so mature) audiences. Approximately 2,500 words.
Book Synopsis Like a Festering Ingrown Toenail--Where’s My Side of Toe Cheese? by : Donald Rump
Download or read book Like a Festering Ingrown Toenail--Where’s My Side of Toe Cheese? written by Donald Rump and published by Donald Rump. This book was released on 2016-05-08 with total page 23 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Earl Muggs wanted a wife. Instead, he got the devil, or close to it. His witch of a wife Helga doesn’t cook, doesn’t clean, and certainly doesn’t polish yours truly. Gagnabbit! So what’s a man to do? Get revenge, that’s what! And mental midget Muggs knows just how… Approximately 1,200 words. WARNING: Contains toe cheese.
Book Synopsis Don't Count Your Chickens Before They Are Hatched Because by : Olga M. Fyne
Download or read book Don't Count Your Chickens Before They Are Hatched Because written by Olga M. Fyne and published by . This book was released on 2010-07 with total page 20 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This book is satirical in nature, and is appropriate for both children and adult audience. To the adult, the title (Aesop's Fable) actually speaks for itself, because it is criticizing the idea of being sure of things, before seeing them actually materialize, or expecting the ideal conditions for things to happen in the future. Children, although they might not quite understand the fable, will enjoy the humor in each line of text, and the lively accompanying illustrations. Olga Mullings was born in New Roads, Westmoreland, Jamaica West Indies. She is the seventh child, born to Alton and Viris Mullings, in a very huge family. She received her formal education, at the Enfield All-Age School, Westmoreland, and attended West Indies College Mandeville, now Northern Caribbean University, (NCU), where she completed a three year course of study in Teacher Education. Olga is married with three children, and migrated to the United States of America in 1987. She has been teaching in the NYC. Dept of Education for 21 years, and enjoys teaching children, but takes special pride in the teaching of reading. This gave her an incentive to write children's books, especially rhymes, which encourages children to read and make it easier for them to decode. Olga is a firm believer that the sky is the limit, therefore, she is always improving herself. As a result, she is the holder of a B. A. Degree from Empire State College, a M.S. Degree from Brooklyn College, a S.D.A. Certificate from N.Y.S. Education Department, with studies completed at Mass. College of Liberal Arts, and a Literacy Leaders Certificate from Teachers College. This summer, she completed a PhD from Northwestern Theological Seminary, with a concentration in Divinity. Finally, Olga was born with an insatiable appetite for writing, and finds tremendous pleasure in doing so. She sees an opportunity to write in almost everything, and has the ability to compose a rhyme, a book or a poem out of just about anything. She also wrote three other books, namely: "My Shadow is a Copy Cat" Jerry and Sherry" and "Squirrel Race." She is available for book-signing events at bookstores, libraries, schools, churches, amusement centers, etc, upon invitation and appointment. She also hosts: educational, spiritual conferences and workshops, performs marriage ceremonies, and accepts educational/administrative consultation, author con-sultation and speaking engagements. For further information, please visit www.fynebooks.com.
Book Synopsis The Bible of Mother Aeon by : Lucifer Damuel White
Download or read book The Bible of Mother Aeon written by Lucifer Damuel White and published by Lucifer Damuel White. This book was released on 2021-08-07 with total page 321 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The Bible of Mother Aeon is a Bible built around the Guardian Goddess Mother Aeon and Her teachings as presented by me, Lucifer Damuel (Jeremy) White. It is a religion founded on instructions for a better life and through it many mysteries about life finally come into understanding. It is an understanding of the occult, too, with which a magician can evolve. The best life principles and the knowledge to operate your life to its greatest potential are contained in its pages.
Book Synopsis Anti Voidalism 2: Book of Raine by : Lucifer Jeremy White
Download or read book Anti Voidalism 2: Book of Raine written by Lucifer Jeremy White and published by Lulu.com. This book was released on 2018-08-31 with total page 104 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This is the second book covering Anti Voidalism. The first established it and was based on the idea that the best someone can do in life is to fill it with good things. This, the second book, called The Book of Raine, continues the religious ideas that the first created, but this time focusing on a way of life that imparts great blessings into it.
Download or read book The $500 Question written by Donald Rump and published by Donald Rump. This book was released on 2014-01-06 with total page 31 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Perkins Deadwood can't believe his ears. His twelve-year-old son just asked for a pet fart for Christmas. And not just any fart, a Spanish fart. ¡Ay, caramba! Can the used car salesman talk his son out of it? Or is this Christmas going to really stink? For mature (and not so mature) audiences. Approximately 2,100 words.
Download or read book Marriage Stinks written by Donald Rump and published by Donald Rump. This book was released on 2013-11-09 with total page 33 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Mackelroy Puggsley thought he'd heard it all until an odd man named Bilby Bloob shows up in his lobby one morning. When Bilby demands a marriage license for his gassy wife, the old man puts his foot down. Sure, it's one thing to marry your high school sweetheart, but a fart? Who in the world marries a fart? "Well I'm not going anywhere until you give us a marriage license," Bilby insists. "Is that so?" Mackelroy cracks his knuckles. Marriage Stinks is a work of fart fiction, approximately 3,600 words in length.
Download or read book Fart Lover Supreme written by Donald Rump and published by Donald Rump. This book was released on 2020-01-24 with total page 27 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Kimberly Grant is ruthless, and wants a taco. Thankfully, she's found a sucker to give it to her. Big time. Approximately 2,800 words.
Download or read book The Hairiest Butt written by Donald Rump and published by Donald Rump. This book was released on 2019-05-06 with total page 28 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The search for the hairiest butt on Venus leads to explosive results. Approximately 1,600 words. WARNING: Butts, with lots of hair on them.
Book Synopsis Put Another Fart in the Jukebox, Baby by : Donald Rump
Download or read book Put Another Fart in the Jukebox, Baby written by Donald Rump and published by Donald Rump. This book was released on 2018-06-19 with total page 20 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When Brad Blemmings meets his blind date at Fifty Something, a retro shake and burger joint, he's not sure what to expect. But the goth beauty Maimah is quite a handful, and then there's the matter of the farting jukebox in the corner... Approximately 3,100 words.
Download or read book The Gay Assteroid written by Donald Rump and published by Donald Rump. This book was released on 2020-09-24 with total page 23 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Bill Bluster, founder and visionary behind the oddball Bluster Space Entertainment, LLC, sees an opportunity. When a pink asteroid is stopped short of striking earth's 15th colony Syphus, he puts in a bid and snaps it up. Now in his possession, he's not sure what to do with it. How does one go about promoting a pink asteroid that doesn't look the least bit menacing? By promising a gay, old time, of course! Approximately 1,000 words.
