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All Things Huge And Hideous
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Book Synopsis All Things Huge And Hideous by : G. Scott Huggins
Download or read book All Things Huge And Hideous written by G. Scott Huggins and published by James & Harriet. This book was released on 2020-08-23 with total page 206 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Hilarious! Veterinary horror like Terry Pratchett would write!"-- D.J. Butler, author of WITCHY EYE"A rollicking adventure that hits all the right notes."--Christopher Ruocchio, Award-Winning Author of The Sun Eater SeriesEveryone says it was better in the Good Old Days. Before the Dark Lord subjugated us. Before he gave all the good land to his ogres, orcs and trolls, reducing the civilized races to serfdom and the dirty work: pig farming, sewer cleaning, veterinary medicine.But even before that happened, things weren't that much different for the veterinarians. Everyone cheered the heroes who rode their unicorn chargers into combat against the Dark Lord's dragons, but no one ever remembered who treated the unicorns' phosphine burns afterward. The only real difference is that now I'm treating the dragons. Today I have to save one's life. Know what fewmets are? No? Then make a sacrifice of thanks right now to whatever gods you worship, because I have only a few hours to figure a way to get them flowing back out of the Dark Lord's favorite dragon. Yeah, from the other end. And that's just my most illustrious client. I've got orcs and trolls who might eat me and dark elf barons who might sueme if their bloodhawks and chimeras don't pull through. And that doesn't even consider thepossibility that the old hag with the basilisk might show up.The only thing that's gone right this evening is finding Harriet to be my veterinary assistant.She's almost a witch, which just might save us both. If we don't kill each other first.
Book Synopsis All Things Huge and Hideous by : G Scott Huggins
Download or read book All Things Huge and Hideous written by G Scott Huggins and published by . This book was released on 2019-07-25 with total page 210 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: IF YOU CAN READ THIS, THANK A TEACHER.IF YOU CAN READ THIS AND YOU HAVEN'T BEEN FED TO THE DRAGON, THANK A VET.That's me, Dr. James DeGrande. Fire-lizards deflamed, dire-rats spayed, flea and tick removal a speciality. I'm your local veterinarian, but I'm also a slave of the Dark Lord. I've hired a new assistant Harriet, who is almost a witch. I just hope that she can do better than my last assistant who ... almost survived.There's no more heroes anymore. That's because they were all fed to the Dark Lord's pet Dragon after the last War.It's not the easiest position from which to make the world a better place, but I might be able to do something about the dragon. If His Darkness's vampiric Prime Minister doesn't do something about me first. It's time to go see my patients, and hope they don't see me first."A rollicking adventure that hits all the right notes." --Christopher Ruocchio, Award-Winning Author of The Sun Eater Series
Book Synopsis Everything Is Awful by : Matt Bellassai
Download or read book Everything Is Awful written by Matt Bellassai and published by Atria/Keywords Press. This book was released on 2019-04-02 with total page 272 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the break-out star of BuzzFeed comes a collection of hilariously anguished essays chronicling awful and humiliating moments from his life so far, proving “the mantra of his life and career: being a human is hard work, so you may as well make your story funny when you can” (Bustle). Matt Bellassai has no idea what he’s doing. Well, to be fair, he did become semi-Internet famous by getting drunk at work, making him a socially acceptable—nay—professional alcoholic. He’s got some things figured out. But the rest is all just a terrible, disgusting mess. This is Matt’s book. Just to clarify, though, it is absolutely not a memoir; Matt is far too young to have done anything worth remembering (though he did win an actual People’s Choice Award for his BuzzFeed web series, “Whine About It,” which is pretty good, if you ask his mother). This is also most certainly not a book of advice; he is too woefully ill-prepared for life to offer anything in the way of counsel. Call this a collection of awful moments that led to his grumbling, blundering adulthood—a chronicle of little indignities that, when taken together, amount to a life of hilarious anguish. With keen wit and plenty of self-deprecation, Matt reveals how hard it is to shed his past as the Midwest’s biggest nerd, and how he came out to his friends and family (the closet was a bit messy). Matt also wrestles with the humiliations of adulthood, like giving up on love in New York City, and combating the inner voice that tells him to say aloud all the things the rest of us are smart enough to keep to ourselves. You probably don’t need this book, but let’s be honest—you do. Since you’re already reading, you might as well pull up a chair, grab your glass(es) of wine, and enjoy.
Book Synopsis One of Those Hideous Books Where the Mother Dies by : Sonya Sones
Download or read book One of Those Hideous Books Where the Mother Dies written by Sonya Sones and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2013-05-07 with total page 279 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Fifteen-year-old Ruby Milliken leaves her best friend, her boyfriend, her aunt, and her mother's grave in Boston and reluctantly flies to Los Angeles to live with her father, a famous movie star who divorced her mother before Ruby was born.
Book Synopsis My Point...And I Do Have One by : Ellen DeGeneres
Download or read book My Point...And I Do Have One written by Ellen DeGeneres and published by Bantam. This book was released on 2011-03-16 with total page 209 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this #1 New York Times bestseller, Ellen DeGeneres shares her hilarious take on everything from our most baffling human foibles–including how we behave in elevators, airplanes, and restrooms, and why we’re so scared of the boogeyman–to fashion trends, celebrity, and her secret recipe for Ellen’s Real Frenchy French Toast. Most of all, this witty, engaging book offers insights into the mind of one of America’s most beloved comics.… Dear Reader, I was awfully excited when I was asked to write a book. I was however, nervous. I was afraid I didn’t have anything important to say. But when I began writing, I realized that although I don’t know a lot about any one thing, I know a little about a whole bunch of things: baking a pie; dancing; curing the common cold; running the Iditarod–it’s all in the book. And I realized I notice things that maybe some people don’t notice (or they don’t notice that they don’t notice). That’s all in the book, too.
Download or read book Huge Cloudy written by Bill Carty and published by . This book was released on 2019-04-23 with total page 112 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Poetry. In his debut collection HUGE CLOUDY, Bill Carty attends to the world, bringing thought to vision with a cartographer's sense of scale, and a shipbuilder's attention to detail. Alternating stretches of lyric narrative with longer serial poems, HUGE CLOUDY proceeds by a Ship of Theseus poetics. Like a series of field notes, the poems document change as the contemporary landscape is revised by big and small forces--the bank vault that becomes an open mic, the pond that becomes condos, the puddle of vomit to walk around. These poems attend to the ugliness of a world, of a history, or poetic lineage, with a magic map. Drawing as much from the neighborhoods of Seattle as from coastal environs, this is a collection that folds the map--a kind of bounding sphere--in on itself.
Book Synopsis Happy Hour in Hell by : Tad Williams
Download or read book Happy Hour in Hell written by Tad Williams and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2013 with total page 418 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Angel Bobby Dollar sets out to rescue his girlfriend Casimira being held hostage in the netherworld by the demon Eligor while also trying to elude an undead psychopath named Smyler.
Download or read book If I Ran the Zoo written by Dr. Seuss and published by RH Childrens Books. This book was released on 2013-10-22 with total page 33 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Animals abound in Dr. Seuss’s Caldecott Honor–winning picture book If I Ran the Zoo. Gerald McGrew imagines the myriad of animals he’d have in his very own zoo, and the adventures he’ll have to go on in order to gather them all. Featuring everything from a lion with ten feet to a Fizza-ma-Wizza-ma-Dill, this is a classic Seussian crowd-pleaser. In fact, one of Gerald’s creatures has even become a part of the language: the Nerd!
Book Synopsis The Shadow out of Time (時光幽影) by : Howard Phillips Lovecraft
Download or read book The Shadow out of Time (時光幽影) written by Howard Phillips Lovecraft and published by Hyweb Technology Co. Ltd.. This book was released on 2011-09-15 with total page 689 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: One of the feature stories of the Cthulhu Mythos, "The Shadow Out of Time" is the tale of a professor of political economics that is thrown into a mind-shattering journey through time and space, while his body is held hostage by an alien mind. Horrified and panic-stricken by the implications of his experiences, he hopes against all reason and evidence that he has merely lost his mind.
Download or read book Hideous Kinky written by Esther Freud and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2021-07-13 with total page 192 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The debut novel from the author of Summer at Gaglow, called "a near-seamless meshing of family feeling, history and imagination" by the New York Times Book Review Escaping gray London in 1972, a beautiful, determined mother takes her daughters, aged 5 and 7, to Morocco in search of adventure, a better life, and maybe love. Hideous Kinky follows two little English girls -- the five-year-old narrator and Bea, her seven-year-old sister -- as they struggle to establish some semblance of normal life on a trip to Morocco with their hippie mother, Julia. Once in Marrakech, Julia immerses herself in Sufism and her quest for personal fulfillment, while her daughters rebel -- the older by trying to recreate her English life, the younger by turning her hopes for a father on a most unlikely candidate. Shocking and wonderful, Hideous Kinky is at once melancholy and hopeful. A remarkable debut novel from one of England's finest young writers, Hideous Kinky was inspired by the author's own experiences as a child. Esther Freud, daughter of the artist Lucian Freud and great-granddaughter of Sigmund Freud, lived in Marrakech for one and a half years with her older sister Bella and her mother. Hideous Kinky is now a major motion picture starring Kate Winslet ("Titanic," "Sense and Sensibility").
Book Synopsis Brief Interviews with Hideous Men by : David Foster Wallace
Download or read book Brief Interviews with Hideous Men written by David Foster Wallace and published by Little, Brown. This book was released on 2009-09-24 with total page 336 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this thought-provoking and playful short story collection, David Foster Wallace nudges at the boundaries of fiction with inimitable wit and seductive intelligence. Wallace's stories present a world where the bizarre and the banal are interwoven and where hideous men appear in many guises. Among the stories are 'The Depressed Person,' a dazzling and blackly humorous portrayal of a woman's mental state; 'Adult World,' which reveals a woman's agonized consideration of her confusing sexual relationship with her husband; and 'Brief Interviews with Hideous Men,' a dark, hilarious series of imagined interviews with men on the subject of their relations with women. Wallace delights in leftfield observation, mining the absurd, the surprising, and the illuminating from every situation. This collection will enthrall DFW fans, and provides a perfect introduction for new readers.
Book Synopsis The Big Golden Book of Dinosaurs by : Robert T. Bakker
Download or read book The Big Golden Book of Dinosaurs written by Robert T. Bakker and published by Golden Books. This book was released on 2013 with total page 65 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Renowned paleontologist Robert T. Bakker and award-winning paleoartist Luis V. Rey combine forces in this oversized picture book about the evolution of dinosaurs. From the conquest of land by dino ancestor Acanthostega during the Devonian Period, through the mass die-off of dinosaurs at the end of the Cretaceous Period, Bakker and Rey take readers on a safari through time while paying subtle homage to the 1960 Giant Golden Book Dinosaurs and Other Prehistoric Reptiles that inspired them both as young dinophiles. With stops along the way to look at monster bugs, ferocious fin-backs, fluffy dinosaurs, sea monsters and the 12-year-old girl who discovered them, dinosaur orchestras, tickling tyrannosaurs, and much, much more, this is a journey readers will never forget. It's a perfect gift for young dinosaur lovers as well as adult fans of Dr. Bakker and Luis Rey!"
Book Synopsis Witchy Eye, Second Edition by : D.J. Butler
Download or read book Witchy Eye, Second Edition written by D.J. Butler and published by Baen Books. This book was released on 2023-07-14 with total page 772 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Now with a new chapter! A STUNNING BAEN BOOKS DEBUT. A brilliant Americana flintlock fantasy novel set in a world of Appalachian magic that works. Sarah Calhoun is the fifteen-year-old daughter of the Elector Andrew Calhoun, one of Appalachee’s military heroes and one of the electors who gets to decide who will next ascend as the Emperor of the New World. None of that matters to Sarah. She has a natural talent for hexing and one bad eye, and all she wants is to be left alone—especially by outsiders. But Sarah’s world gets turned on its head at the Nashville Tobacco Fair when a Yankee wizard-priest tries to kidnap her. Sarah fights back with the aid of a mysterious monk named Thalanes, who is one of the not-quite-human Firstborn, the Moundbuilders of the Ohio. It is Thalanes who reveals to Sarah a secret heritage she never dreamed could be hers. Now on a desperate quest with Thalanes to claim this heritage, she is hunted by the Emperor’s bodyguard of elite dragoons, as well as by darker things—shapeshifting Mockers and undead Lazars, and behind them a power more sinister still. If Sarah cannot claim her heritage, it may mean the end to her, her family—and to the world where she is just beginning to find her place. At the publisher's request, this title is sold without DRM (Digital Rights Management).
Book Synopsis What My Mother Doesn't Know by : Sonya Sones
Download or read book What My Mother Doesn't Know written by Sonya Sones and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2013-05-07 with total page 280 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Sophie describes her relationships with a series of boys as she searches for Mr. Right.
Book Synopsis Stories We Never Tell by : Savi Sharma
Download or read book Stories We Never Tell written by Savi Sharma and published by Harper Collins. This book was released on 2022-12-22 with total page 204 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: There are stories we never talk about. Stories we are afraid to share. Simply because they hurt too much or no one wants to listen to them. Such was the story of Jhanvi, who is a budding social media influencer. She appears to have it all together, living her ideal life, but something is missing: Jhanvi has this impossible need that drives her to be more perfect than any person could possibly be. And the story of Ashray, who had a rocky start in life. With hard work and determination, he translates his dreams into reality, but his deep-seated insecurities come to the fore when life throws him a curveball. As their stories intersect, their lives change in ways they never expected. In a world of loss, darkness and destruction, will Jhanvi and Ashray be able to tell a story of hope, light and recovery?
Book Synopsis Shadows of Ivory by : T. L. Greylock
Download or read book Shadows of Ivory written by T. L. Greylock and published by . This book was released on 2020-07-04 with total page pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: By day, Eska de Caraval digs for ancient treasure in the dust and dirt and sweltering sun. By night, she dons the embroidered silks and jewels that are the markings of her family's success. Spurred by a relentless thirst to lay bare the world's secrets, Eska has led Firenzia Company to renown across the Seven Cities of Bellara, and far beyond. But when she comes into possession of a priceless reliquary with a harrowing history-one of six lost to the centuries-and the treacherous artifact within, Eska unwittingly sets off a race to uncover the other five and the powers they contain. Bankrupt and bitter, Manon Barca supports a brother and a failing company on loans she cannot repay, all while her disgraced father rots in prison. Determined to drag her family name out of oblivion, Manon does not fear to take on the might of Eska de Caraval and Firenzia Company, even if it means sabotaging an excavation and endangering innocent lives. When her reckless decisions put her at the mercy of one of the most powerful men in the Seven Cities, Manon finds herself caught in a storm beyond her making, one that will see the sundering of alliances that have stood for three hundred years.As the de Caraval and Barca rivalry surges, Eska must wield intellect and steel against a web of enemies and deceit, all while Manon battles tirelessly to preserve the final remnants of her family and its legacy.Neither, however, is prepared to contend with the rising tide of an ancient menace unleashed upon the world once more?.
Book Synopsis Destroyer of Worlds by : Larry Correia
Download or read book Destroyer of Worlds written by Larry Correia and published by Baen Books. This book was released on 2020-09-01 with total page 481 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: IF IT'S WAR YOU WANT . . . The best of military epic fantasy as the bestselling Saga of the Forgotten Warrior series continues. The Great Extermination has begun. In the Capitol, Grand Inquisitor Omand Vokkan hatches a plot to kill every member of the untouchable caste in all of Lok, down to the last man, woman, and child. As a member of the Order of Inquisition, Vokkan has no official say in the creation of Law, but he has powerful allies willing to do his bidding. Through them, he has convinced the Judges that the genocide will be swift, complete, and without complication. Nothing is farther from the truth. Lord Protector Devedas has sworn to uphold the Law. Once, he and the traitor Ashok Vadal had been like brothers. Now, he hunts Vadal and the Sons of the Black Sword, heretics and rebels who seek to live outside the rule of the Law. All Devedas must do is find and kill his best friend and order will be restored to Lok. The rebels seek the secret kingdom spoken of by the Prophet Thera, a paradise where water is pure and food plentiful, where there are no castes, where the people rule themselves, and are not slaves to the Capitol. Ashok Vadal is not sure he believes in such a Paradise, but he—along with his allies—does seek refuge in the rebellion’s hideout in Akershan. But Vadal, a former High Protector who has turned his back on the corrupt Law, will not merely wait meekly, hoping that fleeing to Akershan will spare the rebellion from the clutches of the Great Extermination. No, if it’s a war the Capitol wants, Vadal, who has faced down gods and demons, will be all too willing to give it to them. About House of Assassins: “Correia piles on the intrigue, action, and cliffhangers in the invigorating second Saga of the Forgotten Warrior epic fantasy. . . . Correia also weaves in elements that question the value of belief and the cost of giving authority to those who find more profit in preying on the weak. . . . Brisk fight scenes, lively characters, and plenty of black humor continue to make this series a real pleasure.”—Publishers Weekly About prequel Son of the Black Sword: "This book has everything I like in fantasy: intense action scenes, evil in horrifying array, good struggling against the darkness, and most of all people—gorgeously flawed human beings faced with horrible moral choices that force them to question and change and grow."—Jim Butcher, creator of the New York Times best-selling Dresden Files "Best-selling fantasy author Correia casts a compelling spell with this India-influenced series opener. . . . Correia skillfully sets in motion this story of plots within plots, revealing complex, sympathetic characters and black-hearted villains with equal detail and insight. Full of action, intrigue, and wry humor, this exciting series launch promises many more thrills to come."—Publishers Weekly (starred review) "Fans who like Correia’s fast-moving style will be pleased with the plethora of action scenes, and epic fantasy readers interested in delving into a new universe should be equally satisfied. A solid choice for admirers of Brent Weeks and Brandon Sanderson’s Mistborn series."—Library Journal "Correia is, above all, a storyteller, and he weaves a unique and entertaining tale. Without question, his action sequences pop on the page, his magic system has a nice wrinkle, and he has the foundations laid out for some excellent character growth as the series continues . . . [A] definite hit."—Bookreporter "The lore here is fascinating and well told. I enjoyed learning the history of the world and the legend of Ramrowan. The politics are just complicated enough to feel real without being too difficult to follow. Where the book truly shines, however, is in the characters. All are well drawn and distinctively voiced."—SFCrowsnest “I loved the book, it was great, fast paced, with wonderful characters, and also a lot of wonderful scenes that screamed to be painted.”—Larry Elmore, legendary, award-winning artist, and cover artist for Son of the Black Sword. "Son of the Black Sword: Saga of the Forgotten Warrior tells of what happens after the war with the gods, when demons were cast out and fell to the world to nearly destroy these unstoppable beasts until the gods sent a hero to save them. Centuries have passed since this event and the people have regulated these events to legend. One Ashok has been chosen to be a protector with a powerful weapon in hand, uncovering those who still practice old ways and are potential dangers to the order—but when he discovers all his efforts have been based on a lie, everything's about to change. A powerful epic fantasy evolves into a solid, compelling read."—Midwest Book Review About the Urban Fantasy of Larry Correia: “[A] no-holds-barred all-out page turner that is part science fiction, part horror, and an absolute blast to read.”—Bookreporter.com“A gun person who likes science fiction—or, heck, anyone who likes science fiction—will enjoy [these books] . . . The plotting is excellent, and Correia makes you care about the characters . . . I read both books without putting them down except for work . . . so whaddaya waitin’ for? Go and buy some . . . for yourself and for stocking stuffers.”—Massad Ayoob “This lighthearted, testosterone-soaked sequel to 2009's Monster Hunter International will delight fans of action horror with elaborate weaponry, hand-to-hand combat, disgusting monsters, and an endless stream of blood and body parts.”—Publishers Weekly on Monster Hunter Vendetta
